Chapter Text
"Tougou-san--?"
You half-whisper as you wake up from a deep, groggy sleep. Your heavy eyelids open to see a dark figure hunched over your futon. "Tougou?" you repeat, only for the man's hand to clamp down onto your mouth, silencing you. "Shh," Tougou hushes, putting a finger to his lips.
"Don't wake the others."
The 'others' Tougou refers to are your five brothers, sleeping around you on their own futons scattered about the room. You glance to your left where Choromatsu rests. His face is peaceful, deep asleep.
Tougou withdraws his hand from your mouth, moving it to cup your cheek. His fingers brush against your jaw. You stare up at him, his face appears upside down from where you are. You feel a tight nervousness in your chest as he touches you. "Tougou-san?" you venture again, hardly above a whisper. He leans in, his hot breath hitting your nose. It smells like saké and cigarette smoke. "Shh, Osomatsu-kun. You and me, we're going to play a special game, okay?" his voice is low and smooth.
You don't know what to think. Something feels off, and there's a little voice in the back of your head telling you to be afraid. But Tougou is a good guy, right? He just wants to play a game, doesn't he? You do like games.
So, you let a small smile spread on your face. "Okay," you reply, holding a finger to your lips, letting him know you'll be good and quiet.
Tougou takes your hand and pulls you onto your rear, so you're sitting away from him. He wraps an arm around your stomach. "The rules of this game are simple, so listen close, Osomatsu-kun," he says, tightening his grip slightly. "To win, you have to stay as quiet as possible and sit perfectly still, no matter what."
You frown and nod. This game doesn't sound like very much fun.
"It's like a tickle game, you see? I win if you make any noise or try to get away. And you don't want me to win, Osomatsu-kun."
"I-I don't?"
"If you win, I'll give you anything you want; candy, toys, new clothes, all the oden you can eat, whatever! But if I win..."
Tougou trails off. You haven't even noticed his hand wandering to your thigh.
"If you lose, I'll hurt you. And your brothers. I'll kill them, and your parents too."
The blood in your veins turns ice cold. He must be joking, right? You think you can hear a smile in his voice; surely he's just joking!
You feel his hand squeeze your thigh through your pajamas.
"Tougou-san? I dont w-want to play anymore--"
His hand flies up to grip the back of your head, taking a fistful of your hair and twisting it. You let out a small yelp. "Uh-uh, Osomatsu-kun," he hisses. "Quiet, quiet."
You swallow dryly, tears welling up in your eyes. With one fist tangled up in your hair, he slips his free hand under the waist of your pajama bottoms.
---
You won the game. You did so well, Tougou says. Such a good boy.
He keeps his end, buying you candy and toys. Your brothers are so jealous! You can't help but feel a little pleased with yourself.
But, he comes back the next night. And the next. The game becomes harder to win.
But you need to win.
You need to.
---
He tells you he has a secret.
"Your parents know about our game, you know," Tougou says, lifting you to your feet. "I give them money so I can live here, but I also pay them for our playtime."
It can't be true... can it? They wouldn't let him do this, would they?
He leads you out of your bedroom. You turn a pleading gaze toward your sleeping brothers. You will them awake. But nothing happens.
Tougou brings you just outside your parents room. It's dark, but you think you can see the foggy outline of your mother through the rice paper.
Tougou takes your hand.
"Your mom and dad, they have to take care of you six all on your dad's salary. Do you think that's enough, Osomatsu-kun?"
You look at the floor and shrug your shoulders.
Tougou shakes his head. "All the money I give them for you is what keeps your family from becoming homeless. You don't want to ruin that, do you?"
You look up at him. He's wearing a warm smile. He gently squeezes your hand. "No..." You whisper.
He pushes you to the floor and you play your game, right there, inches from your mom and dad. But now you know they don't care. Not really.
No one does.
---
Tougou cares.
It doesn't take long for you to notice how nice he is to you after the game is over. And you've done so well! He always treats you to some oden and cake the morning after. "You're such a good boy, Osomatsu-kun, helping your mom and dad like this," he says.
And you are. Such a good boy.
When he hurts you, he cuddles and pets you afterwards. He murmurs into your neck and tells you how sorry he is.
He is sorry, isn't he? He doesn't want to hurt you, you know it! It feels good to him. He's said so. And you want to make him feel good. For your mom and dad.
For Tougou-san.
---
You wake up in a cold sweat. Gasping for air. Your lungs burn. You can feel his hands all over your body. Touching, rubbing, rough hands on your skin--
You twist and spasm in your bed, kicking the blanket off and scrambling to your hands and knees. Your eyes dart around. You see your brothers stirring around you.
Choromatsu wakes up.
"Osomatsu-niisan?" He says, sitting up with a yawn. He scratches his head, stopping mid-movement to stare at you with a look of mild shock. "Are you... okay?"
You are on all fours, panting and gasping for breath. Your arms and legs are shaking. "No." You manage to choke out. You immediately regret it.
Choromatsu crawls toward you, carefully clambering over your sleeping siblings. He reaches out to put a hand on your shoulder. "What's wrong, Osomatsu?" he asks, his voice low and concerned.
You jerk away from him. "Don't touch me," you say, your voice sounding tight. Choromatsu draws his hand back as though he were slapped. "Osomatsu--"
"Don't touch me!" You bark out, nearly snarling your words. Todomatsu is awake now, rubbing his eyes with a scowl. "What's all the shouting?" he mutters. Choromatsu waves him off and tells him to go back to sleep. You wish he'd leave you alone. You just need to be left alone.
But Choromatsu stays. He sits still beside you, watching with careful eyes as you tremble and pant, until your breath calms and your muscles are burnt out. You sit back down, letting your hands fall to your sides.
Choromatsu lets out a quiet sigh. "Can you tell me what's wrong?" he asks, hugging his knees to his chest. You shake your head. "Just... don't touch me," you repeat. You feel guilty. You're upsetting Choromatsu, you filthy little fuck. You ugly little freak.
Choromatsu frowns. "I won't touch you," he says. "Osomatsu-niisan, can't you tell me what's wrong?"
You should tell him. Tell him.
"Nothing. N-nothing's wrong, Choromatsu!" You say, snapping back into a façade of your usual self. You turn to face him. It takes every ounce of strength you've got. You smile and scratch your nose. "Just a nightmare!" you say. "A pretty b-bad one, I guess."
Choromatsu looks at you. He seems doubtful. "Are you sure?" he asks after a while. You want to scream. "I'm sure, asshole," you say with a scoff as you lay back down on the futon. You pull the blanket up over your chin. "Go back to sleep, Fappymatsu," you say. You squeeze your eyes shut. You don't want to see his concerned gaze. You don't want to see him.
A few moments later, you hear the rustle of the blanket, and among the deep, sleeping breaths of your brothers, you hear Choromatsu. His distinctive snore; a quiet rumble with a touch of whistle in the nose.
It takes you all night, but eventually, you fall back asleep.