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Riri woke up slowly, the sun barely peaking into her window. With a soft sigh and quick stretch, she got up. As she grabbed her blouse and tie, her blazer already sitting neatly on her desk, she’d checked her phone, seeing if Kira had texted her about the plans for the day. So far there wasn’t, she must’ve gotten up before her sister this time, she usually did, just so she could make tea for them both.
She took off her silk pajama shirt and looked in the mirror, sighing as she looked at the scars on her face and under her breast, she had gotten the surgery about 5 years ago, when she was 15. Growing up she felt odd to be the only boy in her family besides father, which also didn’t help her case either.
Kira was the first she told, not like she could really help it though..
——
Riri sat on her bed, shirtless, she had begun to grow out her hair, but it never felt enough. She wasn’t able to use makeup without it seeming odd and couldn’t really wear any type of bras due to her cursingly flat chest.
It was late at night, she shouldn’t have even been awake at that time, but she couldn’t help it. Thoughts about how she felt plagued her mind, leaving her to look in the mirror, tears in her eyes but never leaving them as she looked at herself, her hands shaking just a bit.
Thirty minutes had passed as her mind was filled with how she’d never be a girl truly, she had a bad body type, broad shoulders, sharp face, and her fathers nose. The only real feminine thing about her was her eyes, just like her mothers, a deep green in soft eyes, though always made to look sharp, careful, threatening.
She bit her lip as a sob left her, just barely there, if anyone heard it, she could be punished for weakness and being awake for late. Which made her eyes gaze over the scars on her ribs and hips, more on her back if she turned around.
It must’ve been the soft lamp she still had on, giving just enough light so Riri could hear herself, or that damn sob. But the door of her and Kira’s shared bedroom—the only thing Arkadi let them have without a huge hassle, which the two we extremely thankful for—opened slowly, it didn’t creak, but Riri could feel the eyes of her sister on her, she always did.
“Riruka?”
Riri stiffened up at the name, taking a small breath before turning. Kira’s eyes were soft, a type of softness only reserved for her sister, and her movements careful as she walked to Riri slowly, sitting next to her but leaving enough space just in case.
“Why are you awake?” Riri asked, her voice a bit strained.
“I could ask the same… are you okay?”
Riri looked forward and back at her reflection, one hand went to her chest carefully, she couldn’t hold it in anymore, she had been for months.
“I… I-I don’t want to be a boy anymore… I want to be a girl, like you and my mama…” Riri hated that her voice broke, hated that her vision blurred as she held back tears.
A soft hum was all that left Kira for a moment, a soft frown on her face, it made Riri panic a bit inside.
What if she told father? About her weakness? Her stupid worries? The fact that she broke down in front of Kira. Timurovs didn’t break down, didn’t show weakness, made dumb worries be pushed to the back of their mind. But Riri was only 12. She couldn’t help it.
“Okay…” Kira finally said, putting a hand over Riri’s free one next to her. “What… does that mean? You wanna be called something else? Oh, I’ll have to use girl pronouns for you now… hm, might take a minute to get used to, but it’s fine.”
Riri felt a weight lift off her chest as Kira talked, and she nodded along. “Yea… I’m not a boy anymore… I’ll be a girl, and my name will be… Arienne Rose Timurov, Riri for short.” She said, and she couldn’t help the small smile that came up.
“Hm… Arienne, or Riri, it is! But… you know father with know about this, right?” Kira said, worry in her voice.
“Yea… I know… but, I’ll save up my gamble winnings and get surgery, be happy… and, if I have to take a few beatings before I can be happy with myself… then okay..”
Kira sighed and hugged Riri. “You’re so brave… sister. I’ll be here for you, even if sometimes it’ll have to be from faraway.” Riri felt lighter inside at the term ‘sister’, she knew Kira would have to get used to it, but so far it was going well. “Thank you…”
“Of course.” Kira said while getting up. “Now, sleep, we have a long day ahead of us tomorrow.” Riri nodded and told Kira goodnight as she walked out. Riri looked herself in the mirror, getting up slowly and turning it around before putting on her sleep shirt, turning off the lamp, and settling in bed, her body feeling lighter, even if it’d only be for a while.
——
Riri sighed at the memory, putting on her blouse, tie, and reached for her jacket, making sure it wasn’t wrinkled. She also thought back to how her father reacted, surprisingly, he wasn’t mad, she didn’t get beat, all he truly cared about was if she stayed strong, obedient, and a Timurov, which of course, she did.
Riri looked through her small selection of masks before just settling on a black one with small black flowers engraved in it, but would only be seen if up close, and she knew that only two people had the likelihood of seeing it.
Kira, and Mary.
Riri thought back to the girl, she didn’t know about her being trans, no one but her family and workers did. Everyone else has just known her as Riri, which she definitely didn’t mind.
But, she knew Mary would find out sooner or later, the two haven’t gone anything past making out yet, but she knew one day, it would, and she’d have to be prepared to answer questions, and hope to any divine being out there that Mary wouldn’t love her any less.
——
Riri sat at one of the desks in the student council rooms. Her lunch sitting next to her folders Kira had given her before heading to the main lunch hall with the others. She took out a pill from a pill bottle and quickly took a bite of her sandwich, swallowing it, and the pill. She would’ve done a quick shot and then she would slide into the cafeteria with Kira, but she had unfortunately ran out, waiting for her next bottle to come in. Yes she did it by syringe, it barely affects her anymore anyways.
Riri sighed, finishing her sandwich and drink, discarding it into the trash and sliding her pill bottle back into her blazer pocket. Quickly getting back to work on the files Kira wanted her to inspect. Not hearing the pill bottle slip out of her pocket and onto the floor.
——
Just before a council meeting, Riri stood next to Kira by the window watching over the gambling hall, her sisters eyes focused on Yumeko, her eyes focused on Mary. Both girls knew each other's fondness for the two friends gambling with each other, even if one was more aware and more willing to accept her feelings than the other.
Chad, Dori, and Runa were talking near the table, Suki actually sitting down and scrolling on his phone. Riri made sure she could still hear them just in case Chad almost got stabbed by Dori… again. Her eyes focused on one but ears focused on all.
After a moment, Riri could hear a “What the hell?’ Come from Chad, both sisters turned their head to face him as he picked up a small bottle. “What is ‘Estrace’? That a new drug or something? Damn I didn’t know we could have stuff like this! Wait.. does this mean I can smoke-“
“Shut up Chad, let me see that.” Suki said, now next to the three. “Huh, it’s a form a estrogen medicine, pills to be exact.” Suki said, looking up and sighing as the others looked confused. “It’s for trans people! Male to female to be specific.”
A small ‘ohh’ came from the others, nodding slowly. “Why would someone here need that? By what I know of, Chad loves being a guy, and you do too.” Runa said, taking the bottle as inspecting it, sucker in her other hand.
Riri froze, her eyes widening with panic just a bit. Her hands slowly patted her blazer pockets. She couldn’t feel it. Damnit! She knew she should’ve invested in adding zippers to these things!
Kira could see her panic, even if subtle and put a hand on her sister's shoulder before going to the four near the table, holding out her hand and getting it from Runa. “Hmm… could be from a clumsy house pet. But no one else brings this up, isn’t worth our time, I’ll find out who it belongs to soon.”
The four just nodded, walking to their seats and Kira pocketed the pills, Riri slowly calmed down and the tightness in her chest loosened just a bit, but she knew it either ended there, or someone brought it up, she was hoping it was the first option.
Riri watched as Kira walked over, carefully handing her the pill bottle. “Be more careful with this Ri, now go sit, the meeting will start soon.” Riri just nodded, half thankfulness and the other half obedience as she pocketed the pills and walked over to her seat.
She checked her pockets a lot after that.
——
Riri stood in front of her mirror again, classes had ended and the sun was beginning to set, Kira didn’t need her anymore, so she decided to go back to hiding in her room, reading, checking on her plants, taking her medication and her daily look in the mirror. Her fingers gently grazed over the scars under her breast, taking a small breath then going to the scars on her face.
Two scars were small, over her lips, then a bigger one from her left jaw to the edge of her nose. She can still feel the sting of the bottle hitting her sometimes, the blood trickling down her face, Kira patching her up in the middle of the night after their father fell asleep. It haunted her.
She took a deep breath and pushed the memory back, taking down her hair and placing the mask that was wrapped around her wrist—now neatly folded—into her drawer with her other mask.
She didn’t hear the door open or shut, it wasn’t until she turned around that she spotted her girlfriend. “Mary!” Her eyes widened and she instinctively covered her chest, the spot that her girlfriends eyes were set on.
Mary had never seen Riri naked, the girl never let her. Why? Well, Riri was terrified that if Mari knew, she’d never see her as a girl, as her girlfriend, like the scars were just adding to how much of a freak she was-
“Oh Riri…” Her thoughts were cut off by Mary’s soft voice, Riri opened her eyes, when did she close them? And looked down at Mary, the girl was closer now, one hand on Riri’s hips. “I’m sorry…” the apology came out fast, Riri didn’t even understand herself why she said it, but it felt needed.
Mary looked up at her, raising a brow, “Why are you sorry baby?” Riri sighed, leaning her forehead against hers, her body tense. “I… I didn’t tell you sooner…” Riri mumbled out, pretty sure that Mary had put two and two together by now—she had.
“I thought that if you knew, you’d done me disgusting, think I wasn’t a real girl, that it was just another thing to add to the list of my flaws, that you’d find the absurd amount of scars on me gross-“ Riri paused as she felt a soft kiss on her cheek, and the tear that followed with it.
Damnit. Timurovs weren’t weak, not pathetic, not fearful of others' negative opinions, easily taking them down or ignoring them. But Riri loved Mary, her opinion mattered so much, it shouldn’t affect her, but I did. Love has a way of doing that, letting you feel things that you’ve never thought you could. Riri felt human with Mary, but… would this change things?
“You’re so beautiful baby, scars and all, I don’t care that you’re trans, you’re as much as a girl as me, now, let me prove to you that you’re beautiful.” Riri’s eyes widened, a soft smile growing on her face, a few tears fell down her face, Mary gently wiping them away.
Then, after a moment, Mary’s lips were on Riri’s. The two had kissed multiple times, but it still sent a rush through Riri, the softness of Mary’s lips, the feeling of her touch on her skin, fingers running through her hair, it was heaven to her.
Mary broke the kiss, kissing the scars on her face before moving down to her jaw, neck, collarbone, then stopped, looking up at Riri. She stood up and grabbed her hand, pulling her to the bed, locking the dorm room door in the process and then pulling Riri down onto the bed. “Lay on your back baby…” Riri shivered slightly, the tone of her voice was soft, full of love, and a bit of need. Riri laid on her back without argument, her face growing warm as Mary spread her legs, crawling between them and lying on her a bit, their eyes meeting.
“Can I please show you how beautiful I think you are… you can stop me at any time…” Mary asked, her gaze soft, one hand holding her up and one holding her waist, rubbing her thumb against her hip. Riri nodded, “I need a verbal response hun.” Riri sighed and wrapped her arms around Mary’s neck, pulling her down and into a quick kiss. “Yes… you can.”
Mary smiled and kissed her back before kissing down Riri’s body, first her neck, then collarbone, then reaching the dip between Riri’s breast, her brown eyes still locked on her green ones, making sure that every response Riri’s body gave was positive.
Riri tensed just a bit, her body getting used to these new sensations, her breathing growing heavy and soft noises leaving her as she watched Mary reach one of her breast, lifting it a bit as she kissed the surgery scar, whispering soft praises to her, erasing any doubt Riri had about herself in that moment.
Mary’s hand trailed down Riri’s body, reaching the pajama pants she had put on earlier, her kissing stopped for a moment and her gaze met Riri’s again, silently asking, which was met with an eager nod. Mary smiled softly, leaning back up and kissing Riri as she lifted her hips up a bit, taking the pants off with the help of Riri kicking them to the side.
Tongues met as hands caressed thighs, soft moans filled the room as Mary’s knee brushed against Riri's black lace panties, pressing against her a bit. The kiss broke and Mary made her way down Riri’s body again, kissing her scars on her body in the process.
Once she met the girl's thighs, her fingers hooked under Riri’s panties, looking up at her asking again, “Please… please Mary…” Riri whimpered out, one hand gripping the sheets and the other in her hair, her breathing heavy, red marks littering her body, Mary wishes she could take a picture of it.
Mary quickly took off the panties with a quick tug, tossing them to the side, not caring about where they landed. Mary looked down and hummed, her clit and pussy looked as any real one, just a few scars from surgery, which was expected, must’ve had a great doctor though. Of course she did, she’s fucking rich. Mary thought to herself, mentally shaking her head before pressing her thumb against Riri’s clit, rubbing a bit, earning a whine from the girl under her.
“See baby? You’re a real girl, every part is perfect. You’re perfect…” she whispered softly before dipping down, her lips meeting Riri’s pussy, kissing it and taking in each whine, whimper, and moan before taking her tongue out and working her magic.
Riri squeezed her eyes shut, both hands gripping the sheets now, soft moans leaving her with each stroke of her tongue against her, she could already feel it coming, but she held back, taking the pleasure in, never wanting it to end. “Fuck… yes, yes, yes…” Riri whimpered out, her legs squeezing together a bit around Mary’s head. “I’m close… бля, ангел, я сейчас кончу” She let her natural tongue slip out, she knew Mary couldn't understand, but the way Mary’s thumb and tongue quickened meant she knew enough.
Riri felt it quickly, her body stiffened and she threw her head back, moaning out Mary’s name with an accent, Mary’s tongue continuing, letting her girlfriend ride it out. After she had calmed down, Mary pulled back, looking down at the limp woman, a bit of her cum sticking on her chin, which she wiped off with a finger, taking it in her mouth and sucking it all off before lying next to the naked woman.
She kissed her cheek, rubbing up and down her arm, “You did so well for me baby… such a good girl…” She whispered out, Riri shivered from the praise and term, she turned her head to Mary and sighed, curling up and lying against her. Mary let her cuddle against her, kissing her head, making sure nothing got on her clothes, she still had a gamble after this that she had forgotten until now, she sighed, she’ll just freshen up in Riri’s bathroom.
“Rest baby, you’ve done enough today…” she said, kissing her head again, letting Riri doze off against her. She sighed and slowly got up grabbing the girls a new pair of underwear, sliding them on, then her pajama pants and shirt, covering her up with a blanket before heading to the bathroom.
Today just added to how much she loved her girlfriend.