Chapter Text
It was natural for Zacharie to notice things. He had a very keen eye underneath his mask, and a sharp memory to go along with it too. He was the type to remember all the details of a person’s face, their body, their characteristics, and whether or not they owed him credits. He knows all his item stocks by heart and keeps them well-maintained and counted at all times so he knew if some spectre would pilfer something from his bag of supplies, because what a dangerous life a travelling merchant had, after all. He can sell bats as well as he can use them.
Of course, because of his keenness Zacharie noticed something in his most regular customers. Watching them enter the shopping mall and approach him, a small smile spread across his lips as he saw the Batter lag right behind his Player, all-too-intently staring at them with intensity Zacharie could pinpoint with ease.
“Hello, my dear Player,” he greeted, and he saw the Batter’s eyes lift from his Player’s and to him, a glare replacing the look he was giving his Player from behind. He smirked behind his mask. The Batter was so much like an open book, it was a surprise the Player didn’t notice anything before. “I’ve got a nice new bat I think you and the Batter would like,” he spoke up, leaning down to rummage through his bag and pulling out the new bat he himself had tested out on a Spectre he had run into on his way there. His eyes widened slightly behind his mask—there was still blood on the bat, and hurriedly he wiped it away with his thumb before handing it to the Player for them to inspect. While they did so, mumbling under their breath and looking over at the credits they had stuffed in their pocket, Zacharie took this time to further observe the Batter’s actions.
He eyed the way the Batter look his Player over—his four eyes were soft, admiring, and had a light shine in them that Zacharie was sure he hadn’t seen in them back in Zone 0. His eyes wandered all over the Player’s form—their back (oh, naughty, Batter,) their arms, their legs, their hair, and when his eyes wandered down to the Player’s hands holding the bat, stroking it and looking it over—there, he saw it! A light flush crossed the Batter’s cheeks.
Oh, how easy. Zacharie thought to himself, trying his hardest to not laugh at the Batter’s predicament.
“Right, we’re taking this one.” The Player spoke up, breaking Zacharie out of his reverie, and, thankful for his mask, Zacharie coolly nodded, taking the offered credits to him. “And some fortune tickets and meat.”
Zacharie handed over the items, and after a brief exchange of thanks, the Player gestured for the Batter to follow them down the stairs.
“Wait just a moment, Player,” Zacharie spoke up, “If you don’t mind, I’d like to have a few words with the Batter for a moment?”
The Player and the Batter exchanged looks, both as surprised as the other, before the Player shrugged, and nodded. “Okay,” they agreed, “I’ll head downstairs first. Come back to me soon, okay?”
“… Right.” The Batter replied, just as the Player turned to leave. Zacharie snickered at this, earning him a glare from the Batter. “What do you want?” he demanded.
“I know what you’re up to, Batter,” he purred, sauntering out from behind the counter to be at the Batter’s side, who by now, was staring at him with four bewildered eyes. “I’ve seen the way you’re looking at the lovely Player, Batter.”
The Batter’s eyes widened even more, almost comically, and Zacharie laughed. “I can tell you don’t have a single romantic bone in your body, and at this rate you’ll never get your Player.” The Batter glared at him, but he held up his hands defensively. “But guess what, Batter, I know someone who knows the art of seduction.”
The Batter paused, and stood down. “… Who are they?”
Zacharie grinned behind his mask and presented himself with a flourish. “Yours truly.”
The Batter gave him a sceptical glance. “… You?”
“Yes, me.” Zacharie replied, “I’ll help you get that Player of yours, problem-free.” He showed the Batter a hands-up, winking despite the mask on his face.
“… What’s the catch?”
“There is no catch.” Zacharie chuckled, “Just the satisfaction of a matchmaking job well done, and a lovers’ problem out of my hair.”
The Batter kept his sceptical stare.
“… Okay, maybe if you let me watch?”
“Absolutely not.”
“Even just the dates? Kissy-wissy times with the Player, por favor?”
The Batter gave him a long, hard stare, and Zacharie kept smiling at him despite the mask over his face.
“Batter?”
“You have a deal.”
Zacharie’s grin widened. “Perfect. Now, listen up…”
"So, all we gotta do is just walk straight forward, and—uaagh!” The Player’s speech got cut off when their foot missed the uneven step and they fell forward.
“I’ve got you.” The Batter said flatly, cleanly catching his Player in mid-fall with a single arm, helping them straighten up stiffly, flustered at his close proximity with his Player.
“Thanks a bunch, Batter.” The Player smiled brightly up at him, and a warm wave washed over his body, and a smile fought to cross his face. He did his utmost best to fight it back, only to have it appear crooked on his face. The bright smile disappeared from his Player’s face and they pulled away from the Batter, a cautious expression on their face. “… Uh… do you have a problem, Batter?”
“N-nothing,” the man quickly replied, “You’re welcome, Player.”
“… Riiight.” His Player drawled, slowly nodding, before turning on their heel to walk onward. “Let’s get goin’.”
The Batter, when he was sure his Player wasn’t watching, sighed deeply, his shoulders slumping down. This wasn’t working.
“Strike one, Batter,” Zacharie suddenly spoke up next to the Batter, making the man jolt up and glare at him.
“How did you get here?”
“That’s unimportant,” Zacharie replied offhandedly, waving him off. “You just screwed up what I told you!” he scolded the Batter, “You should act all cool and collected!”
“I tried,” the Batter retorted, “I did as you said—stoic, cool, daunting,”
“Yes, but not all the time, God! Your Player smiled at you, you were supposed to smile back all cool-like and handsome. Get them swooning, sweep them off their feet.”
“You didn’t say that last time.” The Batter grumbled, crossing his arms.
“Well, I had assumed you knew—”
“Batter?” the Player called out ahead. “Where are you?”
The Batter and Zacharie glanced at each other.
“Alright, fine. Here’s another tip for you, just before you go…”
“Christ, are those more pedalos?”
“Seems like it,” the Batter replied offhandedly, looking down the plastic river. “It’s the only way we’ll get through to the other side of the area.”
“Oh, my God, I don’t want to do this,” the Player whined, “I’m out of shape, damn it, I don’t play games to get in shape no matter how much I want to get in shape.”
The Batter chuckled, shaking his head fondly as he climbed into the pedalo. “Just get in, fatty, we have a zone to purify.”
His Player glared at him for a moment, but then they grinned, and the Batter grinned back.
His Player always looked so nice when they smiled.
“Oh, fine, whatever,” the Player rolled their eyes, chuckling as they got in next to the Batter. The man’s skin heated up at their close proximity but he fought to keep himself composed and silent as he and his Player began to paddle.
Quietly, as simply as he could do it, he lifted his arms and slung one over his Player’s shoulders, resting it across the back of their neck.
“Oh, hey, what’s this all about?” his Player asked, grinning up at him, and he grinned back.
“A little stretch,” he simply replied, “And because it’s much easier to paddle when your arms aren’t cramped around your torso, right?”
His Player laughed a lovely little sound that the Batter had always loved ever since he heard it.
“Okay, fine, whatever, dork.” They grinned, “Back where I came from, arm loops usually meant something else.”
“Oh, really?” the Batter grinned back at them, leaning forward in a challenging manner, and a grin crossed his Player’s face.
“Oh, you bet,” his Player chuckled back, leaning in as well, and the Batter realised how close their faces were. “Wanna find out?”
“You bet,” he replied, and suddenly their pedalo started moving on its own, and their eyes widened as the pedals suddenly moved on their own and they realised they managed to catch onto the set path in the water. Panicked, the two immediately set to pedalling themselves out of the trouble they landed in, but their movements were out of sync, and—
Half an hour later, covered from head to toe in dripping plastic, the Batter and the Player met up with a chuckling Zacharie. The Player angrily stomped around the man’s store, and, clearly fuming, looked through the selection of tunics that were on sale.
Zacharie, now practically sniggering, elbowed the Batter.
“Strike two, my friend. Let’s try again…”
“Here.”
The Player blinked down at what the Batter was holding out to them—a packet of sugar with a rather messily-tied ribbon to it. Confused, they took it cautiously from the Batter and looked it over.
“… Sugar.” They said simply after a long moment, “Uh, I don’t know if I needed this, but, um.”
“It’s sweet.” The Batter offered, “Like you.”
“That’s… that’s nice.” The Player raised an eyebrow at the Batter, turning the packet of sugar around in their hands. “Um, what’s it for? What’s up?”
“I just wanted you to have it.” the Batter replied stiffly, “Do you like it?”
“Well, I like sweets,” they began, and a smile spread across the Batter’s face, “But I think sugar’s a little overboard, don’t you think?”
“Oh, well…” the Batter looked off to the side, and much to the Player’s surprise they realised he was biting his lip. “The Elsens like sugar.”
“Yeah, that they do, huh,” the Player chuckled lightly, and the Batter relaxed slightly, his smile relaxing a little. “Well, okay, I guess, I’ll keep this with me.” they smiled at him, nodding, before slipping the packet into their back pocket. “Cute ribbon.” They commented, grinning up at the Batter, who smiled back at them.
“Thought it suited you,” he replied, earning him a look of confusion from his Player, but too happy and flustered, he walked onward, past the Elsen shovelling sugar into a chute, who didn’t even spare a single glance at them. His Player stared after him for a while, before chuckling, shaking their head fondly, and following after their Batter.
When they got the furnace at the bottom, though, the Batter’s good mood immediately dissipated.
“You’re telling me that the sugar is dead Elsens?” his Player shrieked, and the Elsen shovelling corpses (suspiciously looking like they were slaughtered rather than they died of natural causes) nodded solemnly before returning to what he was previously doing. The Batter eyed his Player’s horrified face, and eyed the packet of sugar sticking out of their back pocket, and gingerly pulled it out of his Player’s pocket, taking the ribbon off before letting it drop to the ground.
“… Let’s go back upstairs, Player.” He said, and taking his Player by their shoulders, gently led them upstairs. They stood there together silently on the upper floor as the Batter patiently waited for his Player calm down, as in the back of his mind, he could already imagine Zacharie slapping his forehead in exasperation.
Not another strike, goddamnit.