Chapter Text
Chuuya woke up in an empty bed. His partner was missing on the other side of the bed and the house was in a total silence. Chuuya, just woken up, thought the man was already at the workplace, he didn't put any thoughts about it and started his normal morning routine.
At the Port Mafia's main building, Chuuya went directly at the last floors to greets his boss and grabs his daily tasks. And maybe that fuckface is in Mori's office too. When he entered the boss's office, there were no stinky fish at sigh, meaning Dazai's either sleeping in the nurse room or he passed out at some random bar. Chuuya could've already feel a headache.
Mori was in the middle of giving him his today's missions, when Chuuya felt blood in his mouth, and even before processing his condition, he fell on his knees. His head was bouncing, his vision got blurry and started darkening. Chuuya felt like hundreds of knives were stabbing him all over his body, he felt like someone was burning and skinning him alive. He was spitting blood and bile. His entire body curved on the cold floor of the office. The pain was unbearable, he wanted to screamed but his breath was stuck on his throat, and he could feel his heartbeat decreased.
Kouyou was near him, Chuuya knew that but he couldn't feel nor hear her, or even see her. Soon, he collapses.
When Chuuya wake up, he's in a hospital bed, whites walls around him, with doctors and nurses discussing in the hallway. He's alone in the room, with an hospital gown on and his hair are tied up. He straightens up and sits down.
Not long after, Kouyou enters the room with a doctor.
"Chuuya ! You're up !" She go straight to him and sits at his bedside. She holds two coffees but doesn't propose any to Chuuya. Kouyou lends him a worried and pity look before turning back to the doctor.
The doctor was a really short woman, her hair was tied up in a bun and her white blouse revealed a dark green turtleneck. She finished her coffee and turned to Chuuya.
"Hello M. Nakahara, I'm Dr. GAZZOLA Alessia, the one in charge of you. First of all, could you tell me what do you remember ?" She had a foreign accent, maybe Italian or french.
"Hum.. Yeah huh." Chuuya though really hard, not that he doesn't remember what happened, he does, but he doesn't know what this doctor can or cannot know. "My boss was giving me my daily tasks and-"
"Sorry to cut you" She look at Chuuya. "But could you be as precise as you can, like giving me names, places… And do not worry, I already know who you are and what activity you're doing. I just need to be sure you don't have any memory issue."
Despite the doctor's reassurance, Chuuya stays suspicious. He glances at his eldest, Kouyou nods and invites him to pursue.
"So my boss, Mori Ougai, was giving my daily tasks in his office- the Port Mafia headquarter- and I just- hum… feel like my heart had stop beating. Like someone was ripping my soul… in… half…" As he spoke, Chuuya started to realise what might have happen. His breath become heavy and his head was spinning. Kouyou grabbed his hand, and Chuuya tried to focus on her warmth.
"Okay…" Dr. Gazzola writes something down on her paper and look back at Chuuya. "Do you remember how you get here, at the hospital ?"
"No…" Chuuya shakes his head. "But Doctor, is it- what happened to me ?"
Alessia Gazzola sadly sighs, put down her clipboard, and sit down in front of Chuuya. "I think you already know what happen but, I'm sorry to announce you this M. Nakahara, but your mate died."
Chuuya feel like he was out of his own body, like he was spectating the events and not living it. He knew, when the first hint of pain appeared, he already knew Dazai was gone. But hearing it was different, it mean it's real. Chuuya squeezed Kouyou's hand, her hand prevented him to fell into another crises. His head was buzzing and every sound and word become noise. Except one…
"…and the baby is fine…"
baby…
The baby…
"Huh ?"
Chuuya eyes are wide open. She didn't- I mean that's not what- Could Chuuya be- ?
"Is there something wrong M. Nakahara ?" The doctor stops talking and look at Chuuya.
"Hum, just Chuuya please, but hum…" He take a deep breathe. "Could you repeat that last sentence ?"
"Sure. I said, you will have to come back for weekly checkup and-"
"Sorry I mean before that."
"The baby is fine ?"
The baby…
Chuuya started panicking. His breathing become heavier and his hands felt numb.
"What do you mean the baby ?" Chuuya turned to Kouyou to see her just as shock.
"Oh… You-" The doctor took a deep breathe. "You didn't knew… M. Naka- Chuuya, you are six weeks pregnant."
Silence.
"No. I- Huh ?!" Chuuya's hand landed on his belly, involuntarily. His eyes were wide open and his thoughts were just screams and more screams. He's pregnant ? He's gonna have a baby ? Does he want a baby ? Does Dazai even- oh…
"I'll leave you alone for a moment, okay ? I'll be right back when you'll have… processed everything." Alessia leaves the room as Chuuya internally panics.
"Kouyou, what the fuck am I supposed to do ? I can't have a baby ! I'm a fucking mafioso ! Imagine how dangerous that is ?! And what would Mori said ?! I would have to skip work ! And Dazai's fucking dead ! And-!" Chuuya was hyperventilating. His vision was getting blurry, and he was tearing his hair out.
"Chuuya, calm !" Kouyou forcedly hugs Chuuya, pulling him out from his thoughts. She was rubbing his back, and he starts to calm down.
"Chuuya, do you want this child ?"
Does he want it ? Well- no ? He's eighteen for fuck's sake ! and he's a mafioso and the father literally just died and he's a fucking mafioso. But-
"Yes… I- I want this child…"
"Then have it. I'll take care of the rest."
"But what would Mori-"
"I'll take care of him too."
Chuuya hugged her more tightly. "Thanks Kouyou…"
Is not that Chuuya wanted to keep his pregnancy a secret from his boss, but just a little bit. Like a week so he could prepares himself. But of course, Mori Ougai has to found out in just two days.
So now Chuuya is in his boss's office, while his boss wait for him to explain why he wasn't informed.
'So, Chuuya, why didn't you bring this excellent news !" Mori kept his smile while looking directly into Chuuya's soul. Well, half-soul now…
"I'm sorry Sir, I just-… just was processing things I guess ? And I wanted to informed you when I was completely sure if I kept the baby." Chuuya was fixing the floor, he tried to focus on the blacks tiles but Mori's look was unsettling.
"And ? Do you want to keep the baby ?"
"Yes Sir." Mori joyfully sighed.
"What a marvellous news ! But, I have to inform you Chuuya, just like it was with young Yumeno, if your child inherit of a spectacular gift, they would have to work for the Mafia. Am I clear ?"
Chuuya shuddered. He knew Mori would proposed something like this, but he doesn't want his future child to live the same path as he did. Don't get him wrong, Chuuya's good where he his, but he prays any God that could hear him to mercy his child with such a path, he prays that his child would never have an ability, so they could live a normal life.
"Of course, Sir." Chuuya bows and starts to leave the office when Mori stops him.
"Ah yes Chuuya, we have prepared Dazai's funeral. You are of course, as his mate, invited to join us. I'll sent you a mail for the time and place."
Chuuya quietly nods before leaving. His heartbeat is louder and louder as the words Dazai's funeral keep running inside his head. When Chuuya enters his office, he drops on the floor and his eyes bawl out with tears.
Chuuya put his sunglasses on, he doesn't want people to see him crying over that dumb mackerel. The group of researchers spent weeks searching Dazai's body, but they found nothing. So for the funeral, they'll just buried an empty coffin.
Chuuya grabs his black jacket, his belly has started to grow a little. From a strangers perspective, Chuuya doesn't look pregnant, he just has a little bit of belly fat. But in reality he's ten weeks pregnant. On his office's desk, Chuuya have an ultrasound picture of his baby in a frame.
A driver was sent to his penthouse, he sit on the backseat and let the driver take him to the funeral.
The funeral for Dazai where minimalist, not a lot of people showed up, most of them were here for the security of the Boss rather to paid their respect to Dazai. Only Mori, Kouyou, Akutagawa, and Chuuya were attending.
Mori made a speech about how loosing Dazai is a great loss for the Port Mafia and that his memory will honoured and respected. But Chuuya didn't feel good, the whole thing didn't feel right, he hated how the casket was close because no body was found. His skin was itching and his breathe was heavy. He was supposed to be grieving but- that didn't feel right, that didn't feel real.
Before he knew, Chuuya was having another crises. His vision darkened and he threw up blood. His body collapse in Kouyou arms and he had stopped breathing.
Chuuya woke up in the same hospital room as last time, same whites walls, same bed. Even his doctor was the same, Dr. GAZZOLA Alessia. Well, she was his personal doctor since he learn about his pregnancy so that's made sense.
She takes his vitals and asks him some questions. When she got all her answers, Alessia brings out the ultrasound machine to check on his baby.
"Everything looks good, let me just show you something real cool.. Tututu you hear that Chuuya ?"
Badum… badum… badum…
"Yeah, what- what is it ?"
"That, Chuuya, is your child's heartbeat."
Chuuya's eyes are wide open, he leans closer to the machine and focus on the sound.
badum… badum… badum…
He laughs with joys and reliefs. His child, his baby, his little heart.
Dr. Gazzola give him a USB flash drive with the sound of his child's heartbeat on. Chuuya, later on, get to sleep with this sound.
badum… badum… badum…
"Here we can see the head" The doctor point out a part of the ultrasound where the baby's head was showing.
Chuuya was nineteen months pregnant, he go less and less to missions since he's prohibited from using his ability for the child's health.
Alessia gave him the ultrasound picture, but she looked worried.
"Is there something wrong Doctor ?" Chuuya put the picture in his bag before turning at her.
"No it's just- hum…" She bites her thumb's nail and sighs. "Chuuya, how do you feel and please do not try to lie nor minimise it."
"I mean, I'm good. No really, well yeah I'm tired most of the time but I'm creating a fucking life in my body so I guess that's just normal ?"
"How tired are you ? On a scale of 1 to 10 ?"
"I don't know, nine ?" Alessia frowns but takes notes.
"Do you have any body aches ? Or muscle soreness ?"
"Hum…" Chuuya frowns. "Yeah, my feet hurt and sometime I feel like my back would just snap in two. But that's all. Oh and my hips just keep getting wide, like fucking wide."
"Okay, it's normal for hips to be wider, it prepares you for childbirth, but hum…" She notes and look more and more worried. "How do you sleep at night ?"
"I mean, as you know, little baby here is a kicker, so not really well." Chuuya laughs a little but starts to worrying a lot. "Is everything good ? I'm- huh, I'm starting to worry. Isn't it normal symptoms ?"
"Chuuya, those symptoms are normally for the last trimester, it's to soon for you to have them. I'm afraid the loss of Da-, him, affect more your pregnancy then we anticipated"
The name Dazai was banned from every conversation, especially if Chuuya's around. The mention of this man would sent Chuuya in a storm of emotions and triggers his crisis. The doctors said it will heal with time, and they would normally encourage the use of Dazai's name, but it could be dangerous in this state of pregnancy. Every doctors said it was a miracle that Chuuya and his baby were still alive and in a decent health today, so they've pushed back the mental healing process for after the childbirth.
"How ?! No, why is that ?!" Chuuya started panicking, he doesn't want his child health being endanger because his soulmate was a suicidal maniac !
"I fear that's because you're are no longer exposed to his pheromones. When an omega is pregnant, his partner's scent help him for the symptoms. Do you perhaps still have, I don't know, a piece of clothes with his pheromones on ? It might help."
Chuuya thought about it. Most of Dazai's belongings were buried in his place. But there still is something…
"I…" Chuuya gulps. "I have a jacket."
Dazai's iconic black jacket was hidden in Chuuya's dresser. He didn't want to see it, last time it triggers a crisis, but Chuuya couldn't bear giving it away.
"But I can't even look at it without even falling apart. I hate it, why can't I overcome this stupid- ! Ugh !" Chuuya screams out of frustration.
"Hey Chuuya" Dr. Alessia takes Chuuya's hand. "You need time, your mate passed away and your soul was literally split apart. I know it's not easy and it will never be easy. You will never fully recover from this but-"
"Wow you are so good at reassuring people…"
"But, you'll find a way of making life more easy. You're still grieving, it's okay to not be okay." She gently hugs him. With all his hospital checkups, Chuuya and her have grown a pretty solid friendship.
"You're a bad therapist."
"I know…" They both calmly giggle. "But, for real, you have to exposed yourself to his pheromones. If not for you, do it for the baby. You don't have to be awake for this, I don't know, sleep with the jacket or…" She steps back from the hug and starts looking at her phone.
"Or ?"
"Or you can bring it here." All the lights in her head lighted up as a plan write itself. "You have weekly checkups, so if we exposed you to his scent when you're here, you wouldn't have to worry about having a crisis at home. We could make sure you got your weekly amount of pheromones until you're either used to it or you don't need it anymore !"
Chuuya is flabbergasted. This seems like a good compromise, he wouldn't have to worry about collapsing in his house, and his baby would get better !
"Yeah, I mean- wow ! Who would have thought you're actually a genius ?"
"Haha really funny !" She rolled her eyes but couldn't hide her smile. "So you're in ?"
"Yeah ! Obviously !"
"Great ! Well, see you next week and don't forget the jacket, and also you can bring someone ! Oh and don't forget that we will see the gender next week too !"
Chuuya nods and leave the hospital. He's kind of nervous, what if the plan don't work and it worsen the baby health ? How would he even takes the jacket without freaking out ?
That is why he brings Kouyou.
Kouyou is objectively the person Chuuya trusts the most. She took, takes, and will take care of him like an older sister. Chuuya called her and only said that he needed help and she was already in front of his doorstep.
What a woman.
Kouyou took care of bringing Chuuya, and Dazai's jacket at the hospital. She stayed next to Chuuya every time he went into a crisis so Chuuya wanted her to be here this time too. Because today, he will know the gender of his baby.
Dr, Gazzola used the ultrasound machine and a little baby appeared on the screen. She moves the controller around Chuuya's belly and starts pointing out things like a head, a hand, some feet. And then…
"You see this here ?" She zoomed on the screen and pointed out a part of the pictures. Both Chuuya and Kouyou lean into it.
"This right here means, Chuuya, that you're gonna have… a baby girl !"
Chuuya widely smile. He keep looking at the ultrasound screen. He's going to have a girl ! A little baby girl ! Did you hear that Osamu ? We're having a little girl !
"Oh my god ! Did you hear that Kouyou ? I'm a girl dad ! That's amazing !"
"I'm so happy for you Chuuya, I'm sure you'll be a great father." Kouyou kindly smiles at him.
After some other basics checkup, Chuuya was asking to lie in the bed. Alessia and Kouyou prepare him for the exposition of Dazai's scent.
"So we'll just start with the minimum of pheromones to see how you react to them, then we will progressively raising the amount until you have you're weekly dose alright ? It shouldn't triggers any crisis, but if you don't feel good, hit the bed two times okay ?"
Chuuya nods and they start. They take the a part of jacket out of it contained bag, Alessia and Kouyou, both wear gloves to avoid putting their own pheromones on it. When the scent starts to be out of the bag, they slowly approach Chuuya.
At first, Chuuya doesn't feel anything out of the ordinary. His pregnancy symptoms are still here but he doesn't feel any crisis. Then it came closer to him. His heartbeat immediately starts accelerating and his breath become heavier, but all his body ache disappear and he radically feels better on his own body. He sighs in relief and closes his eyes. Kouyou and Alessia stay still as they're seeing Chuuya completely relaxing.
Minutes passes, and the relaxation slowly starts to feel more painful. Chuuya hits the bed two times and the two women zipped in the jacket in the bag. Chuuya's heartbeat return to normal and Alessia checks his and his daughter's vitals.
"Oh wow, it worked even better then I've planned, all your vitals return to how they were supposed to be." She takes out a stethoscope and puts it on his belly. "And your daughter seems in a great form, that's good ! Did you already thought of a name ?"
"I was thinking 'Megumi', what do you think ?"
"Grace and Blessing, what an excellent name." Kouyou looks at him with pride and gently smile.
Chuuya has enough of his pregnancy.
He's almost at the end of his pregnancy, and he never was this tired. His feet, back, legs, and even his fucking breast hurt. Chuuya can't even go outside his house without being in pain. And the worst part is that's normal symptoms ! All that doesn't have any correlation with Dazai's death ! He just suffer because 'why not ?'. Chuuya spends his days on edge, he could and will kill anyone who breath to close to him. He's tired and somehow always sweaty, and the fucking august heatwaves aren't helping. Chuuya so tired of everything, even his hospital checkups as to be done at his penthouse. He can't even drink his pain away ! And apparently it's illegal for Mori to give him works in his state, since when the fuck Mori cares about what's legal? Chuuya literally kills people as a daily activity ! Really, he doesn't recommend pregnancy.
So Chuuya was suffering, lying in his couch and eating apples. Oh did he forgets to tell that the only thing his body allow him to eat is apple ? Because fuck that. Chuuya literally tried every food this planet has to offer, and every times, he'll just throw up. Except for apples, apparently. So the only things he eats are apple based. He has enough.
Chuuya was watching a lame TV show, when he felt something drowning on his legs. Water… His water broke. Shit.
He painfully gets up and grabs his phone on the dinning table. He composes Kouyou number and wait until she hangs on.
"Chuuya I swear to God if this is again some pregnancy's cravings bullshit I-"
"My water broke."
"…"
"I'm on my way."
Nine hours later, Chuuya was screaming, pushing, grabbing, and hitting. Every doctors, midwives, and nurses got at least cursed two times each. He was feral, Chuuya was red and sweaty and why the fuck his daughter isn't out yet ?! He kept pushing and finally he heard a noise.
A baby noise.
Kouyou was the one chosen to cut the belligerent cordon, and then Chuuya finally had his daughter in his arms.
She was 19 inches and weight no more then 7 lbs, her eyes were blue like Chuuya and the little bit of hair on her head were brown as Dazai's. Chuuya cried and kissed her forehead, he release his pheromones for the baby to get used to it.
"My little Megumi…"
Alessia takes back Megumi to clean her and make sure she's in good health as the midwives take care of Chuuya. When Dr. Gazzola came back, she lend back Megumi to her father and talks about things Chuuya didn't really catch. All his focus where on the tiny human in his arms.
His daughter.
His and Osamu daughter.
For the next two days Chuuya spent at the hospital, all his friends gave him a visit.
First it was, unsurprisingly Kouyou, who technically didn't leave the hospital. She bought him everything he needed. Food, clothes, toys for newborn. She was even more ready then Chuuya himself.
Next to visit were the Akutagawas. Gin and Ryuunosuke, visits Chuuya at the hospital and brought him baby clothes. Gin was very excited about the baby, she didn't hesitated to hugged her, while Ryuunosuke was a bit more reluctant and kept a distance with Megumi.
"She's not going to bite you Ryuu.."
"I know Chuuya, but she's so tiny I'm afraid I'll hurt her."
"No you won't idiot." Ryuunosuke stand on his word and Chuuya didn't have the energy to argue with him. He preferred to watch Gin play peekaboo with Megumi.
An amount of people came to visits Chuuya, Hirotsu, the Black Lizard, and finally Mori.
Mori was playing with Megumi as Chuuya was uncomfortably sitting on his bed. The Port Mafia Boss hugged Megumi and looked at Chuuya.
"I hope you remember the future of this child if she obtain an ability, right ?" Chuuya nods. "Well, in the meantime, your daughter is placed under the Port Mafia security, you don't have to worry about that. No enemy of us would ever learn about her, and if they do, they'll be killed even before they could spread the words."
"Thanks, boss."
"Please don't, she's family." And then Mori repose Megumi in her bassinet.
Chuuya descended into the Port Mafia's dungeons carrying his baby. Megumi was 6 months old, she just mastered crawling and waving at everyone. Every time Chuuya is walking her in the stroller, she waving at every person they walk by. It(s absolutely adorable, plus she has the cutest smile of all time. She's a perfect little angel.
Chuuya is currently going in direction of the dungeons, well one in particularity, for a good reason. Their is still one person who hasn't meet Megumi yet.
He push the door, revealing a nice and cozy fake apartment. Sitting on a couch was a blonde man reading a book, he didn't even glares at Chuuya.
"I already said that I will not leave the basement. Could you bastards respect my choice ?"
"Way to greets your brother."
Verlaine immediately gets up but stops when he see Megumi.
"Chuuya ! What- ? Who is that little thingy ?"
"This is my daughter… Your niece."
Verlaine eyes wide up as he looks at the little person. Megumi smiles and waves in his directions.
"Megumi, this is your uncle Verlaine, he's a little weird but it's because he's french."
Verlaine rolled up his eyes and lightly touches her, like she was made of porcelain. When he finally carry her, she laughs at him.
"That's my girl !" Chuuya caress her hair.
"Since when ?"
"Well, she's six months old, so if you add the nine months of pregnancy… Yeah."
"Oh.." He paused and looks at her. "She's adorable, who's the fath- oh." Verlaine stops mid sentences as he see Chuuya's face darkening. He immediately understands who the father is, and his heart break as the thought of his baby brother dealing with this as a widow.
"Yeah… It's- still a sensible topic." Chuuya focus on his daughter who's eating Verlaine's hair. "Don't eat that Mi, your uncle didn't wash his hair since ages !"
"Hey ! Stop this anti-me propaganda !"
They both laugh as Megumi drools on her uncle's shoulder.
When Chuuya went back to his penthouse, he knew that, even if this will be difficult, he will get through this. Because now his entire world as changed.
But before going at his home, Chuuya made a detour to the graveyard. He went first to five graves. He disposes fresh flowers and make the presentation.
"Megumi, they're your uncle, this is Albatross, Lippmann, Pianoman, Doc, and Iceman. Guys this is my daughter Megumi." Chuuya stayed a bit with the flags before heading another gravestone.
Chuuya sits in front of it and put his daughter on his laps.
"Megumi this is your father, Dazai Osamu.
Osamu, meet our daughter, Megumi."