Archive of Our Own

Chapter Text

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When they went out to the balcony, Bull and Cullen carried two old solid chairs with them. Cullen seemed absolutely content to follow his every step and direction without question. Bull set the kit and his bag on one of the seats and took a look around. This was nothing like Skyhold. The desert night was crisp and clear and there was a light breeze, but they were mostly protected from it by the shape of the keep. This space should be just fine.

It was late and there was no one else around, so Bull didn't have any worry that they might be interrupted or noticed. They’d put Cullen in this corner specifically to keep him away from the majority of the troops and the people that stayed when the rest of the Inquisition moved on to regroup and restock and restore. Bull didn't really care if they were noticed, though, and he was pretty sure that Cullen didn't care at this point either.

Bull took a step back and just looked Cullen over in the desert moonlight, trying to gage his mood or thoughts. It was hard to do, it was different now, but he was starting to get the hang of it. Right. He would lay things out and see what the man thought.

“So, there are rules to follow. They make sure everything stays clear and safe. We've always had a safe-word. That was just part of our original arrangement. The word is Katoh. Any time you want to stop, saying that will do it. No questions asked and no hard feelings. No hesitation. It just stops. Understand? That word exists to make sure neither of us gets hurt.”

Cullen nodded his understanding. “Katoh. That is Qunlat for stop.”

“Yep. That's right. That goes both ways. I have certain things that I won't do. If we cross any of my lines or into any territory that I think isn't good, I will stop things. Afterward we can discuss it if there's a need.” Cullen nodded his understanding again, listening closely to everything Bull said, so he continued. “I will be taking the lead in this. I like it that way, but that doesn't mean you don't have a say. You have every right to dictate how things go and I want you to. I won't do anything that you don't want and I expect you to tell me if you are ever uncomfortable or do not want to do something. Remember, you can stop everything, then afterward we will reassess. Is that understood?”

“I understand.” Cullen answered, he was especially focused on Bull, that little thoughtful wrinkle forming on his brow. “That is all very reassuring and appreciated. Thank you."

Bull huffed again. That kind of proper response was definitely Josie's influence. Cullen might use the same words or even phrases, but the quality and tone was just different now. He was so proper most of the time. He tilted his horns in the bright night air. “Alright. Then, if you still want to do this?” He waited for Cullen to answer that he had not changed his mind and then Bull's smile broadened. Here was the last chance to say to the void with this.

“I want you to strip all the way for me. Everything off.”

There was a momentary hesitation before Cullen nodded again. At Bull's order he felt a twisting in his stomach. He wasn't sure exactly what the reason for that was. Was it adrenaline? Was it a physical response to danger? Was it endorphins for a completely different reason? Whether it was fight or flight or arousal or something else…it wasn't an entirely unpleasant feeling and it seemed to be a purely physical response. Still, he was fairly confident that there was nothing here for him to feel anxious about. Especially after the rules that Bull just explained, that he had some control over how things might go.

He was very aware of Bull’s intent gaze on him while he toed off his boots one by one, then undid his belt. When his fingers were on the clasp of his pants, he paused again with a flicker of indecision. Trying to weigh the risk of doing this against the potential reward.

Bull was just watching him until the pause. Then he stepped forward and touched Cullen's jaw, tipping his chin up. “We don't have to do this. If we stop, it's no big deal. It's completely up to you.”

Cullen looked up at The Iron Bull who was towering over him and so warm that he could feel the body heat radiating off of him despite the evening’s chill. Hearing the dominance in his voice had him starting to question the soundness of his reasoning. Shouldn't he be more cautious? Then the knight pushed the insecurity resolutely away. He swallowed once to loosen the tightness in his chest and then continued undoing his pants and slipping them off to fold and set aside, then his smalls were dropped onto the pile. Cullen stood there fully nude and only a little tense, the cool night breeze bringing up a hint of goosebumps on his skin. He told himself that was the only reason for them, even though that twisting in his stomach had grown tighter while Bull just looked him over, was still just watching him.

“Hmmm.” Bull took a moment to admire him and to let the new situation between them settle in. After that momentary hesitation, Cullen seemed perfectly calm again. Expectant. Alright, well…what was he waiting for? He reached into the leather bag and carefully withdrew something which the moonlight revealed to be a curved, slightly bulb shaped object that was polished smooth and shiny. “So. This is the toy that you’re curious about.” It wasn't all that large, but it did gradually increase in size along its relatively short length. It had a large loop at the end that Bull twirled around his finger playfully. “Now that you’ve seen it, do you still want to try it?” He asked teasingly.

Cullen's eyes snapped to and followed the object in Bull's hand. It looked a little intimidating now that it was right in front of him, but…what he'd read about his other self’s experiences…well… It had been compelling and he was curious, and it all fed right into all these inappropriate things that were preoccupying him. Why was his mouth suddenly dry? “That is supposed to go inside me?” He asked quietly. Was that a hint of apprehension? Or might it be arousal? He wasn't sure. It didn't feel like he expected or like what he remembered. Or thought he remembered.

“If you want it to. Sure.” Bull answered and leaned in a little more, looming intentionally. Letting his voice drop into a deep rumbling baritone that he knew would garner a reaction. It always had before. Taking on a very dominant and predatory aspect. Really expressing it so openly that Cullen had to notice and react. “Do you actually want this, Cullen?”

There was definitely a response. Cullen shivered at that dark rumble. It seemed to spark an instinctual thrill in him now. The quiet stretched. He was not certain how to answer Bull. At the same time warning bells were chiming within him, warning that there were so many ways this could go awry. Common sense said he should avoid all of this. The things he had experienced were nothing good and they had changed him, but his other self had somehow been able to get past it. So it was possible. And Bull was so very different from any of the things that made him uncomfortable. Very different… He had no idea what to expect here.

Finally he nodded.

“I need words, Cullen. Clear verbal answers.” Bull demanded before he would be willing to go any further. “I don't do guesswork when it comes to this.”

Cullen paused, then responded softly. “Would you help me make some better memories, Bull? Show me something better than what I’ve been shown. Please.”

That simple, almost meek, soft spoken request struck Bull unexpectedly hard. “Damn. That's a pretty low bar and this is pretty intense. It's not novice stuff. Are you sure?” Bull leaned down and brushed his lips against Cullen's smooth, freshly shaved cheek. “I know you can handle this physically, but if you're not ready for it…”

Cullen shivered at the gentle closeness and his insides twisted again, but he pushed past the almost queasy discomfort and confided “I trust you” with more certainty than he'd shown the last few minutes, turning his head just slightly into Bull’s and feeling another shiver slip through him at the rough brush of stubble on his own lips. Bull was so close, but the only place they touched was there.

He meant it. He trusted The Iron Bull as much as he was capable of and more than anyone else right now.

As tense as it made him when people got too close, even as foolish as he was sure that it was, he trusted Bull to be this close to him. Maybe he shouldn’t, but his older self trusted Bull and the Qunari had been painfully honest with him on everything thus far. In fact, the big man had even told him a number of times now that he shouldn’t trust just anyone, not even him, but that only caused him to trust Bull more. A part of him even thought that could probably be by design. Bull was a spy and gaining trust was part of his skillset, but Cullen needed to trust someone so he chose not to think circles around himself in this.

“I place myself in your hands.” He said for the second time that night.

Bull just eyed him for a moment. “Alright… I’ll respect that. That means I will dictate how this goes and you’ll obey me. My first order to you is that you will tell me if anything changes or if anything needs to change.” He let out a low rumble and slid his fingers into Cullen's hair, tipping his head back so he could press their lips together.

Cullen blinked twice before he realized what he was supposed to do in a situation like this. This was something he knew and understood. He’d necked behind the blackberry bushes lots of times. Outside of the training center near the edge of the woods that marked the boundary of The Order’s property. One of the few places where wayward cadets could sneak off to and not be noticed. Sometimes with actual girls…and sometimes ‘practicing’ with a boy. It had been fun and terrifying and embarrassing and exhilarating all at once. So he did know how to go about this. He even might have been good at it once.

Cullen tipped his head slightly more and kissed Bull’s warm, waiting mouth. It felt a little mechanical at first, but he got a feel for Bull’s lips quickly and could feel them turn upward in a pleased smile at his proaction. Which told him that he’d done the correct thing. Then Bull kissed his breath away. It started as a tentative exploration until Cullen let out a soft sound and then Bull deepened the kiss with tongue and just a hint of teeth, drawing forth a slightly surprised sounding gasp, but not a bad one.

Bull smiled wider and nipped at a lower lip, sucking firmly on it. He knew very well just how much Cullen liked kissing, that definitely hadn’t changed. He started out slow and gentle like he was teasing an innocent virgin. In a way, he was. Letting Cullen get the feel of this before turning on the real heat.

Easing him further along until the knight started to push closer, hands lifting to grasp at Bull's big barrel chest and the leather strap of his shoulder brace. That was a very encouraging reaction. Cullen might be emotionally stunted, but it seemed not to have stifled his physical libido. He'd always been very responsive that way. It was nice to know that hadn’t really changed either. It was so very Qunari of him, Bull thought with some definite amusement.

“Mmm. You’re a quick study as always. Sit down for me.”

Cullen obeyed dazedly, sinking down into the chair and watching Bull sink gingerly to his knees in front of him. Shivering as large hot hands slid over his bare skin, stroking up thickly muscled thighs to grasp hold of his hips. He really was breathless and oh so tense, and it was coming clear that there was arousal mixed up along with everything else heating his blood.

Bull slid Cullen forward to the edge of the seat, glancing down to smirk at the half hard cock twitching between them, then leaned in to continue kissing him. Hands stroking and caressing seemingly everywhere. Almost everywhere. They didn't stray anywhere too intimidating or too intimate yet. Nothing more than he could handle.

At first, Cullen tensed a little and didn't have the slightest clue what to do and especially what he should do with his hands, then he slid them up to clutch at Bull's broad shoulders and just gasped under his firm touches. He was trying his best to keep his focus on Bull and nothing else. If he let his mind wander it might go somewhere he'd rather not, thankfully focus was not really a problem for him these days. Slowly the twisting in his chest eased, repetitive touches helping him to know what to expect, to relax into this. Just like the waltz earlier. This felt nice, better by the moment, and a certain amount of tension that he hadn't even been aware of started to simultaneously escalate and melt away at the same time. It was not a feeling that made sense to him at all. It was overwhelming.

Bull rumbled with satisfaction at the way he was responding and pressed in closer so he could hook Cullen's legs up over his arms, easing him further off the edge of the seat. Cullen let out a surprised sound, but other than being a little wide eyed, he just curled his calves around Bull’s thick biceps and relaxed into the extremely suggestive and unexpected position. He had not an ounce of control or leverage at this awkward angle, half held in Bull’s arms, half resting on the chair. Bull paused, eyeing the slightly startled reaction and the way Cullen was actively deciding to push past it. He’d definitely seen him do that before, even before his present mental state. The old Cullen used to do that too. This was so very similar to their first sessions, long before sex ever entered into it.

“Everything still okay?”

“Yes.” Cullen answered very softly, slowly reasoning himself through accepting and embracing this new vulnerability.

The Iron Bull considered him for another few seconds, then leaned in with a soothing rumble. “I'm going to start preparing you. Just relax and enjoy it. You don't need to do anything else right now.” He kissed him again.

When Bull broke the kiss, Cullen sucked in a breath and gasped out an uncertain and breathless “Yes.”

Whatever Bull wanted to do, his body was responding eagerly despite the fact he didn't know what to expect here and he decided he was willing to find out. He shuddered against Bull's lips when a thick, oiled finger began to massage between the cleft of his backside. When that finger pressed inside him he arched sharply with a startled noise that Bull swallowed hungrily. The sensation surprised him, but it wasn't bad per say. In fact, it didn't really feel all that strange despite the fact he'd never done this before, never even thought about it. None of his torturers had either. This was very much unexplored territory for him, yet his body accepted it quickly. It remembered how to go about this even if he didn't and it felt surprisingly good despite the invasiveness. His hips flexed forward of their own volition, encouraging that thick finger to work deeper inside him and he gasped in again, this time in surprise when it curled and rubbed just right. It did feel…

“Oh…ooooh…wow…” Cullen moaned out and the sound of it made Bull laugh.

He'd gotten that exact reaction from him the very first time, before, back in the Emprise. Bull rendered him speechless by adding another finger and starting to very slowly work them in and out. Cullen wasn't quiet for very long. Soon he was whimpering and writhing under the onslaught, grasping desperately hard at Bull’s shoulders, his bobbing erection was full and heavy and jutting up proudly between them now, but completely ignored.

Eventually, Bull broke the kisses again to smirk against his lips, thoroughly pleased by how he was reacting. “I'm going to slip this toy in now. You're plenty ready for it.”

Cullen panted out another breathless “Yes.” and this one wasn’t at all uncertain, then he was gasping in earnest as the liberally slicked shape spread him and pushed inside. It hadn't seemed all that large to look at before, but it seemed to take an eternity before the whole, oddly shaped thing finally seated inside him and Cullen was arched sharply, breath held and not daring to move even to relax. Bull carefully eased his legs down to the ground and just admired the debauched way the knight slouched in the chair before him, erection still straining and still untouched.

“I never get tired of seeing you like this.” He growled approvingly. “There’s one thing you need to do, though.” He slid his finger into the loop of the toy and began to play a little, shifting it inside him. Causing Cullen to gasp and twitch again and have to grasp at the chair for purchase, lest he slide bonelessly right off the seat. “You need to identify which muscles you need to flex to keep it from slipping out. ‘Cause I want it to stay where it is for a while.”

Cullen whimpered, eyes closing tight as the toy moved and brushed against something sensitive inside him that he had no idea was even there before Bull revealed it with his explorations. “Oooo… I…mmmm…” He bit his lower lip hard and attempted to do as Bull said, trying to flex and figure out what it is that he meant. The effort brought ever more sounds out of him.

Bull gave a last playful little tug on the loop when he felt it was well seated and that Cullen had gotten a feel for it now. “There we go. Now. It's time for you to sit up and take a look at my horn. Do you think you can do that?”

Cullen blinked up at the clear starry sky overhead, still very breathless. “Oh. Oh, I forgot all about that. …I'm not sure that I can.”

Bull chuckled. “Take it slow. I know for a fact that you can.” He wiped his hands on a towel from his bag and then opened up his horn care kit, taking his time rooting sound while Cullen attempted to pull himself back together again and figure out how he was going to sit up on this hard wooden seat that had no padding whatsoever with this toy in the way. When Bull turned back he just smirked at his struggles. “Try sitting up on your hip bones. Arch your back.”

Cullen gasped again, eyes widening as it shifted inside him and he had to remember again how to flex around the toy to keep it from sliding out. He had a white knuckled grip on the chair just to keep himself in it as he shifted carefully.

“Yeah, just like that.” Bull grinned in amusement and then settled down on the floor in front of Cullen, facing him between his knees again. He caught one of Cullen’s wrists, lifting it away from gripping the seat to put the sanding tool into Cullen’s palm. Moving on as if he was oblivious to the man’s difficulties. “So, first you smooth down the rough edges. Don’t go too hard. Then you rub this sticky black resin into the crack. It sets fast. You sand it down a little more, then polish with the balm until it’s good as new.” He paused and smirked at the still dazed looking man when he received no immediate response. “Did you get all that?”

Cullen, who was very distracted, licked his lips and slowly nodded, perched very stiffly on the edge of the chair, his knees spread wide around Bull’s chest. “...I got it.” He finally agreed and then made a concerted effort to turn his focus onto the horn in question. He did not know how good a job he would be able to do like this, but he was going to try his best. It would not do for Bull’s beautiful horns to be left weak to further damage.

But this was very distracting.

Bull smirked. “Good. You better have. Remember, that is your only job right now. That is the only thing you are supposed to do. Don’t get sidetracked. Focus. Because I’m going to be doing my best to sidetrack you.”

“You will?” Cullen just blinked at him as if he did not completely comprehend the directions or the warning that Bull was giving.

“Yep. So stay focussed. Oh, and one more thing. You are not allowed to orgasm until I give you permission. Keep that in mind too.” He added that as if it were just an afterthought, then, smirking, Bull took hold of Cullen’s waist and leaned forward to start to slowly lick along the muscular contours of his chest.

“...Oh.” Suddenly Cullen’s mouth was very dry again and his eyes half closed and he found it was quite a bit more difficult than he thought to assert his focus where it was supposed to be.

Especially with Bull’s hot, clever tongue assailing him while the toy shifted around.

~ * ~

The Iron Bull was having lots of fun.

It was a surprise just how much fun he was having. It was almost possible to forget about Cullen's mental state when he was like this.

Panting and submissive, straining and struggling to deny the pure physical pleasure Bull was supplying. Trying to control innate instincts and rise above the urge for satiation, trying to be good.

He was being soooo good for him and he hadn’t responded negatively even when Bull used those exact words. He’d done it just to test that and Cullen didn’t hesitate at all. The extremely negative association he had toward being called a good boy must have been part of the time that was now lost.

He was hard pressed to say that the man was acting all that different than he normally did when Bull had him bound and submissive. Cullen was just as responsive as ever. Maybe more so because he didn't have any of those insecure doubts and inhibitions floating around in his skull and preoccupying him anymore. No, Cullen seemed to be fully in the moment with him from the very start. He was kind of glad to find out things weren’t as different as they first seemed. He hadn’t expected the knight would enjoy this kind of personal time anymore.

In fact, he’d been really worried during the first week that Cullen was suddenly just going to become a guy that went along with everything anyone suggested or just accepted what anyone said without question because he had no opinions of his own.

Sometimes that guy was fun or useful, but other times that kind of guy could be a big problem. Thankfully, that wasn’t the case. Cullen had shown that he did still have standards and boundaries and opinions, even if it took more effort to get them out of him now.

If the man hadn’t shown so much improvement these weeks, Bull would not have agreed to this, but Cullen had been showing more and more hints of his old personality in a lot of ways and Bull was sure it wasn't just his own wishful thinking.

He still distrusted mages for one thing. In a crowd he would search the faces around him until he located the one that was the mage. Bull had watched him do it. Cullen usually wouldn’t say anything about it even when he was asked what was wrong. He wouldn’t admit he was wary unless the question was phrased exactly right to force him to, but the wariness was clear to Bull. It was even clear with Dorian, though today he'd relaxed much faster than Bull ever expected. He couldn't help but wonder if it really was just the alcohol or some other reason.

Not that the Vint was ever around to know for sure. No, Dorian was still hiding in books and booze because he could not face failure and loss. The only thing keeping the Vint from going on an absolute uninhibited bender was the fact that they were in a barren desert without anything around. That would change when he went to Orlais, but that was not Bull’s problem. He’d tried.

He'd never paid much attention to anyone that was Tranquil before, he’d never had a reason to, so this was really the first time he had to think about what it did to a person. He knew Cullen very well and he could see what it had done to him. Bull could also see hints of how this younger more innocent minded Cullen might have gained the attention that helped him promote so quickly in a mage hating circle like Kirkwall. This Cullen was fresh from his trauma and had not had the time to try to process anything before his dreams and his emotions were stripped from him. All that trauma was still rattling around loose in there, but it was also clear that Cullen was actively trying to rise above it.

That's why Bull agreed with him and now he was taking great care with him. Focussing on bringing him to the summit of physical pleasure, just shy of release, over and over until he was trembling and glassy eyed and sweaty and just perfect. Normally the old Cullen would be actively pleading for release by now. That was the only really noticeable difference in the level of teasing that they’d reached tonight.

This present Cullen wasn’t begging for anything.

He was too rooted in the moment, too wrapped up in the cloud he was in. He didn’t want more, well maybe he did, but however needfully he moaned or moved or strained, he also seemed to trust completely that Bull would give him whatever was there to give and he accepted it as it came. This Cullen didn’t fight him or resist him at all, he was being absolutely obedient to a fault and without reservation.

So much that Bull had to actually clarify his phrasing a couple times, but once they were both on the same wavelength everything progressed beautifully and the scene drew them both in practically all by itself.

~ * ~

Bull’s horns had long since been fixed and polished and now they gleamed in the moonlight. Since then, Bull had taken over completely. For the most part, fixing his horn had just been an excuse for Bull to tease and test him.

Cullen had not disappointed him. He’d passed with flying colors, really, and now they’d progressed far beyond all of that uncertainty.

Maybe even a little too far for a very first time.

They started out slow and controlled, but it had been so fluid and easy that Bull allowed it to escalate and Cullen rolled right along with everything he threw at him. Like a champ. Just like always. Definitely better than expected. It just felt natural with no second thoughts, no regrets, no negative stray thoughts or comparisons or discomforts. He made sure to take it real slow and easy, making sure that he could ease into things, and Cullen lapped it all right up like a parched traveler being offered a glass of water.

At this point, Bull was on his back on the floor of the balcony with Cullen straddling him. Bull was still wearing his voluminous pants, but the bulge of his own erection was hardly hidden under the loose material, especially with the needy way Cullen ground against it. One of Bull’s hands gripped a muscular thigh bruisingly hard, the other cupped his ass, two fingers were hooked into the loop of the toy and massaging the base of it. Rhythmically easing it deeper and shallower while Cullen held himself arched up and whimpering, eyes squeezed shut in ecstasy. Struggling to maintain control.

Bull leaned up, breath hot on Cullen's flushed cheek. “Are you ready to cum?” He purred.

Cullen gasped, the question whispered in his ear startled him out of the universe of wonder and pleasure he was lost in. He held onto Bull’s harness strap with a white knuckled grip, for lack of anything else to really brace against. Bull was the only steady thing in his world right now and the things he’d been doing to him had left his mind a complete foggy haze of bliss. “...yes.” He had to swallow before he could dredge up enough voice to answer properly. “Yes, please.”

Bull chuckled. “So polite. I like that. I want you to cum for me.” The hand on Cullen’s thigh slid to wrap around his weeping erection for the first time this whole session and as soon as his fingers squeezed down, that was the end of any resolve Cullen might have harbored to hold out, if he was even capable of doing so.

Bull’s voice rose in his chest like a dark, heady, thrumming, rumbling growl. The command was clear in it. “Cum now.”

Cullen cried out, giving over explosively now that permission had finally been granted him, bucking hard into Bull’s hot palm, back arching sharply as muscles bore down on the toy. Everything that had slowly been building up this whole evening finally crested that summit Bull had been teasing him ever haltingly toward.

It was mind blowing and he spilled over that edge without reservation and disappeared beneath it all, trusting that Bull would be there to catch him. Believing Bull wouldn't let him fall. Giving over completely.

Wow. It was Bull’s turn to think that now. That had been something to see. Something he missed seeing. Cullen was just as gorgeous now as he’d ever been like this. Bull cradled him in absolute contentment until he roused on his own again.

~ * ~

It took a little while for Cullen to rise far enough out of his bubble to become aware of anything more than Bull's fingers tracing soothing circles on his skin. When those glassy golden eyes finally regained some sense of presence, he looked at Bull with uncertain curiosity and even a little wonder.

It was laborious to move his now languid, luxuriously exhausted body, but he forced himself. His body ached deliciously from all the things Bull had done with him and he was absolutely exhausted, floating in a heady fog of perfection. When Cullen shifted, he could feel that Bull was still very hard beneath his thigh and he looked at the telltale bulge that was barely concealed within those baggy trousers.

“...what about you?” His voice was a soft rasp.

“Nah. I’m good. I enjoyed that a lot.” The Iron Bull only smiled proudly and made no move to upset the contentment of the moment. “I know you did too.”

Again, Cullen was confused. One of the things that he became used to in Kinloch was being used for someone else's gratification. He'd gone into this expecting that would be part of this too and had accepted it. That little wrinkle formed on his brow that showed when he didn’t quite understand something. “But you haven’t finished. You spent all that effort on me. What about you?”

Bull chuckled and shook his head. That innocently confused expression on Cullen’s still flushed face was so cute. “Nah. That wasn’t the point. No, Cullen. I’m good.”

The idea had Cullen as floored as he could be while he floated in that perfect heady fog of contentment. The last hours, he had zero concept of how long it was, had been eye opening. Even if exquisitely torturous, it was in an amazingly good way. A wonderful way. A way that did not leave him feeling dirty and used or abused or hollowed out. If anything, he’d been pampered and spoiled, treasured, and practically worshipped. Bull hadn't taken any pleasure for himself, he'd selflessly given it all to Cullen without demand. This was like nothing Cullen had ever experienced before and he was struck by the unexpected selflessness of it.

Bull could see that the exhausted man needed more explanation. He smiled, voice low and sultry and reassuring. “What we did tonight was all about you. That's all. No reason to complicate it. We’re just gonna let this sink in and see what you think about it later. Then. Maybe next time we’ll do more. Maybe not. We’ll see. Alright?”

A long moment passed and Cullen continued to think idly about that, to puzzle over it. Bull really wanted nothing from him, had gone through all that effort, had done mind blowing things to him, and that was it? It was all just for him? Bull expected nothing in return? It made Cullen feel…strange…relaxed…cared for. He pressed into Bull’s chest, feeling the heat of Bull’s body against his and the now cool stickiness of his spend between them. He stretched up to brush his cheek against Bull’s again. Feeling the rough rasp of stubble against his own smooth cheek. Exploring this closeness. He let out a hot breath of his own as he just indulged in this quiet sense of such relaxed comfort and closeness that was…that was fine. That was good.

At some point he realized a new delicate sort of security suddenly existed between the two of them.

Cullen never expected anything like that to evolve from this encounter. This was the antithesis to anything he expected, but Bull made it seem like it should be normal. Now he thought he might understand better why that other him could have clung so hard to some ill-tempered and catty apostate. Compared to everything he’d been through, that apostate must have seemed like a compassionate angel. That’s certainly what Bull seemed like right now.

This reaction he was having. He'd had it before. It was familiar even in its strangeness.

It was just a part of who he was. Now he was starting to understand why his older self was so concerned about opening himself up to this kind of thing. Was afraid to give in to this. He could now see the sense in avoiding this. He could. This was dangerous in a way he hadn’t foreseen.

But it was too late now and he honestly did not care to avoid this whatsoever. Now that he’d experienced it himself he saw how good it was. If Bull offered more, he’d accept again in a heartbeat. There was no question about that.

“You’ve done this with me before?” Cullen’s voice was low, a soft whisper of realization.

A slightly wistful smile settled on Bull’s lips and he pulled Cullen back down against him. “We’ve done a lot of different things. I always get something out of it. I have fun with you, we have fun together, it doesn’t have to make sense. It’s not so much about want as it is about need. I like giving people what they need.”

Cullen thought about that too and then nodded and gave over, snuggling in close, completely willing to stay exactly like this, cuddled and held securely in Bull’s large protective arms. It was more than comfortable. This was a sensation that he’d never experienced as an adult. Not like this. This too was a pleasant memory to add to the small list. Another good memory to carry, just like he’d asked for. The last time he remembered being held like this was so many years back, when he was young and still at home with his family and taken ill. He remembered loving arms holding him, different ones taking turns keeping watch over his fever until it broke. That was before he reached that age when a tender boy needed to firm up and learn to act like a strong man and put things like sentiment and comfort away.

The strangely vibrant memory caused him to ponder why it was that something so simple and comforting should be denied merely because of an arbitrary thing like age. Even as he thought it, he understood that it was an odd and pointless thing to question, but even knowing that, he still thought it was a valid question. There was no good reason not to indulge in this, only arbitrary ones. Was that really true, or just an excuse to be so indulgent? Or was that just the pleasant endorphins in his bloodstream talking?

He wasn’t sure. Again, why was he thinking pointless circles around himself?

“I get stuck in my head sometimes.” Cullen suddenly muttered softly as he resolutely pulled himself from the strange, cycling, circular thinking that had suddenly come over him. “You said that about me, didn’t you?”

Bull raised an eyebrow, but kept smiling at the man cuddled up with him. “Yeah. You do sometimes. Why? Are you thinking too much again?”

“I think I am. I will try to do better.” He spread the fingers of one hand across the wide expanse of Bull’s chest, over the spot where his large heart thudded loudest. It just felt natural to do so. “I think this was good. Thank you.”

Bull chuckled again. “Eh, don’t try too hard. That’s what I’m here for. You’ll put me out of a job. And you’re welcome.” He stroked his thick fingers through curling blond hair. It was getting longer again. He smiled at how Cullen relaxed even more with the touch. “Come on. Let’s go back to my room. We’re gonna clean up and have a treat, and make sure you’re all good, okay? You’re bunking with me tonight so I can keep an eye on you. No arguments.”

There was not even a hint of any argument pending. “Mmm. No arguments.” Cullen agreed and groaned through a bit his lip as he was eased to his feet, that toy was still very much present and as soon as he moved it became very much on his mind again. “That sounds nice.” He said distractedly.

Bull grinned at how sultry Cullen’s calm tone sounded with the added rasp from the toy rubbing in just the right spots. He wrapped the towel around the knight's waist while he eased them both up. Cullen searched for balance for a few seconds, then just leaned complacently against him again and closed his eyes. It seemed like he found his way into that headspace even easier now and like he managed to stay in it much longer than he used to. Bull let him lean against him, wrapping an arm around his shoulders and pulling him in close while he used another cloth to wipe away the stickiness smeared between them. Then he scooped up the bag and Cullen’s clothes.

His little cuddle buddy was still very much here, even if it was all new to him. In this, Cullen still acted just the same as before, but looser and even more cuddly. He wasn’t on constant guard anymore, not so constant that it took effort for him to relax.

That did wonders for any misgivings that Bull harbored about whether this was a good idea or not. Forgetting some things had done Cullen some good. He’d lost some of his intensity and some of his experience, but for the most part he was still Cullen. He was still recognizable. Bull was glad for that.

~ * ~

The dream began as all dreams do. The first expression of the Fadescape was always the easiest to slip into without realization. That’s why it was so dangerous to the uninitiated. It often took time to realize that one was dreaming. Especially when the dream was to do with completely ordinary things. It was much easier to realize that it was the Fade when one was surrounded by amazing and incomprehensible things.

Qarinus, or Ventus as it was now known, was blisteringly hot in the summertime and this one was no exception. It might be a little too hot for even Dorian’s comfort as he stood on the balcony of his family’s estate and looked out at the breathtaking view. He still loved it. The Boeric Ocean sparkled and stretched out as far as he could see. There was only one island between Tevinter and Seheron that marred the horizon’s perfect arc. One island within sight, at least. A reminder of the constant Qunari threat that lay just beyond.

His father was one of the Magisters that helped rebuild this port city after the Qunari incursion into Tevinter was rebuffed. Dorian was only a baby at the time, so he only knew Qarinus as it was today. He had such wonderful memories in this manor. When his mother was not in residence he had brought any number of lovers here for trysts. It was far from prying eyes and wagging tongues, but it was also far too sleepy a city for him. He much preferred Vyrantium’s noise and excitement. Still…it had its allure.

“Are you coming back inside anytime soon? You’re going to bake alive out there.”

And there was something else very alluring here right now.

Dorian smiled and raised his ice cold glass, rolling the chilled crystal along his brow and then slowly down his cheek, throat and chest. There was a clink as the glass touched one of the golden rings that adorned a nipple, causing it to stiffen and his skin to pebble with gooseflesh. The only things he wore were a nearly sheer robe that hung fully open and a tiny pair of creamy beige lounging shorts cut high and open on the sides. They were barely decent for company, but he was certain his company did not mind.

Half turning, he threw a coy smirk at the man lingering within the cool shade of the manor. “You will have to acclimate to the weather sometime. You won’t ever see snow here if that’s what you’re waiting for.” He teased, smirking as he continued to play with first one nipple and then the other. Watching greedily as his companion turned an alluringly dark shade of pink, eyes locked on his chest.

A low grumbly growl rose. “You know that the second I step out into that blistering sunshine I will burn to a crisp. If you insist on staying out there, you can just keep playing with yourself. I’ll stay inside. Thank you.”

Dorian let out a rich, long laugh at that rebuttal. “I see how it is. Well, then. I guess I have no choice.” He strode slowly back into the cool of the shade and went quite willingly when his lover wrapped his arms around his heated body and pulled him in close.

“Mmmmm…that’s better…” Pale hands slid over Dorian’s sun darkened skin, a cool caress that rivalled the icy glass he’d been toying with.

That deep rumble made a shiver run down Dorian’s spine and he just enjoyed this. It was a perfect day. A perfect moment. A perfect story. Their noses bumped and Dorian just savored the closeness and the scent of honey sweet citrus. His guest was still covered in the massage oil from the morning and he smelled delicious. Dorian closed his eyes and breathed him in and let out a long, slow, unsatisfied sigh.

He stayed like that a moment, allowing himself to be drawn in and held. Just for a moment more. Just a little more. He was a weak man, after all, and this was perfection.

“Mmmmmmmm…” Finally his eyes opened and he looked at his beautiful partner. “You know… I did warn you… That I would not tolerate this caricature of yours, but you went ahead and did it again anyway.”

Honey sunset eyes widened and the man that looked just like Cullen stepped back in sudden alarm. “Wait. I was just offering a balm. You’ve been so down lately, I just meant to…”

The sultry smile on Dorian’s face turned mean and hard as diamonds. “You meant to take advantage of what you think is a present weakness.” He raised a hand threateningly and fire blossomed over his palm. “I assure you, I am not weakened and I shall not put up with such boorishness. Be gone.”

Fire enveloped the persistent Desire demon and it fled with a shrill scream from his mind palace. Hopefully the lesson was learned this time.

Dorian stared after the demon and let out another sigh. It had been a sweet story, but it was not one that would ever come to be. He knew that. He’d always known that even before it all fell apart. Cullen would never come to Tevinter. He would hate it here. He sighed again and looked down at his glass once more, then took a sip of the really excellent beverage. There was no wine like dream wine.

He whirled around when the sound of slow clapping suddenly filled his bedroom suite. His eyes fell upon a man that he did not know. He was dressed as a dapper Tevinter nobleman and he was lounged on Dorian’s very expensive sofa, legs crossed and propped on the firm cushions, shoes and all.

“Well, now. I was beginning to wonder if I was merely going to witness a fool’s folly, but you banished that one masterfully. I am pleased to see I was wrong.” The older man spoke with a proper and polite tone that was self possessed and perfectly at home, despite the decor that Dorian enjoyed. Normally he would expect a fellow countryman would be put off by such hedonistic extravagance, but this ‘man’ did not care at all.

Dorian frowned and then turned to face the interloper. He normally had better control of his dreams. This is what he got for drinking himself into a stupor. “You can go too. I am not in the mood for this tonight.” He sighed again and raised his hand threateningly toward the unknown man now. “Besides, I have no interest in older men. I’ve been down that path before. It didn’t end well.”

“Oh, I’m not here for that, though I do suppose it would be an amusing distraction.” The man rose from the sofa gracefully and straightened his dapper, if old fashioned, suit which was dark and well cut and trimmed with gold embroidery and pearls. His long dark hair was streaked through with gray at the temples and pulled back in a tail and he wore an immaculate thin beard and mustache. His dark face was touched with wrinkles that suggested a man that smiled often and did not indulge a stressful existence. He circled Dorian, looking him over as if he was taking his measure, just as Dorian was taking his. “I suppose you are not the worst candidate for an apprentice. You have some potential. It’s wasted, though.”

A bark of a laugh burst from Dorian’s lips and he took another drink. “Oh, this is really too much. I am over this already.” He raised his hand to snap his fingers and banish this new demon from his domain. The sound echoed throughout the suite like a thunderclap and Dorian...blinked…

The man was still there.

He blinked again in consternation. It took him far too long to recover from this unexplainable occurrence. This…had never happened to him before. No demon could resist his superb control over his own mind palace. This………was not good. This was not good at all. This was very bad indeed.

“Hmph. You’re the one that sought me out, child.” The man said, a smile taking over his face, showing pearly white and perfectly straight teeth. A man of means and power. The epitome of a Tevinter Magister. “I’m only answering your call.”

Dorian took a few steps backward, putting space between himself and this person. “I’ve done no such thing. I’ve made no call for anyone. Now, if you’ll be so kind as to remove yourself from my-...”

“You’re reading my book, aren’t you?” The man answered with that knowing smile still firmly in place. “The culmination of my life's work. You know it was never published in the flesh. I wonder how you laid your hands upon it.” He paused and stared into Dorian searchingly. “Oh, it was gifted to you through a trial. How interesting.”

The breath caught in Dorian’s chest and he stared in shock when that sank in. “You’re saying that you are.........Callistus the Fade-Touched??” This was absolutely not possible. This couldn’t be true. It had to be a trick. It was a trick. There was no other explanation. There couldn’t be.

The older man threw his head back and laughed, his voice echoing through the room, and then he struck a deep, flourishing and mocking bow. “At your service. Though no one called me that to my face when I was alive. It’s a bit condescending, don’t you think? It suggests that I was bestowed with ability rather than that I strove long decades through great hardships for it.” He straightened with a knowing smirk. “So. You want to learn to truly navigate the Fade. You want it very badly, or I would not be here.”

A lump of fear crawled into Dorian’s throat and it was a struggle to swallow around it. “Mafarath’s Balls… You’re a very powerful demon and I’m about to die in my sleep.”

“Oh. Don’t be so dramatic.” Callistus waved a dismissive hand and gave an amused snort. “You are a natural medium and necromancer and you are quite gifted with both abilities. Oooh…and you’ve even learned to dissect magic down to its quintessential aspects. Impressive. Very few mortals come to understand such things. They are usually so stuck in their own views of existence that they cannot fathom such aspects.” He smirked and then nodded to himself, as if coming to a decision. “That would be a terribly boring way to end this conversation, don’t you agree?”

“It would severely damage my reputation.” Dorian agreed hollowly.

“Good. We’re in agreement, then.” Callistus grinned. “Let us chat, why don’t we?”

~~~

A stack of books tumbled over when Dorian lurched up from sleep. He looked around wildly, but he was in his room in Griffon Wing keep. Safe and sound. He noticed the book in his lap, still open to the page that he fell asleep reading.

He quickly ran his hands over himself, checking for any spirit or demonic energy or anything that wasn’t…wasn’t supposed to be there. He was in one piece. He wasn’t possessed. He seemed fine. He was fine. Well, other than a pounding hangover, which he quickly healed away. Oh thank the Maker!

Everything was just as it should be. It was just a dream.

He swallowed hard and carefully closed the book in his lap and set it down very far away, as far away as he could reach. Then he flopped back down into his bed with a great exhalation of relief.

“No more drunken stupors with Fade-Touched artifacts pressed against my skin! I am such an ignoramous!”

He meant it when he made the declaration. He really did. That dream had been extremely unnerving and foolish. He meant it for as long as it took for that feeling to fade away. That only took about a minute while he lay there staring unseeing up at the bare ceiling.

But…

The conversation he’d had with that Fade conjured apparition was astonishing. Exceptionally strange, but astonishing. He groaned and covered up his eyes with a hand and shook his head in denial. A groan escaped him. He knew he would not be able to help himself. Not now.

He fumbled for the book again. He couldn’t possibly stop reading it now!

~ * ~

The next morning Cullen woke up wrapped up against Bull’s side, still held close.

It was warm and safe and he was so comfortable that, when his eyes snapped open with the dawn, he didn’t immediately move. After a moment he decided to stay lounged in that comfort rather than rolling out of bed as he normally did. There was no pressing reason to do so. No urgency. So he closed his eyes again and stayed as he was.

After a little while Bull’s large hand lifted and spread out on his skin, firmly but gently pressing him closer, like a hug while checking to see if he was awake. It felt good. It made Cullen’s lips twitch in an unaccustomed way. Corners tipping upwards. Just ever so slightly.

“Hey.”

Cullen’s eyebrows lifted and he opened his eyes again, turning toward Bull and letting out a contented yawn before greeting him with a sleepy rasp. “...morning, Bull.”

The big man smiled at the informal greeting. “Good morning. You good? You didn’t just spring up to take on the day when you woke up. I was starting to wonder.”

Cullen languidly shook his head and sighed, staying snuggled right where he was. “I’m good. Sore, but good. I can get up. Or I could stay like this. I’m good either way. This is just comfortable.”

“Mmmm. Five more minutes, it is.” Bull agreed playfully.

~ * ~

Once they did find their way to getting up and out of the room, it wasn’t long before they were called away bright and early to handle a new issue that suddenly popped up in the surrounding area.

Specifically, the location of a mine where red lyrium was being seeded had been discovered. Before breakfast was even laid out for the rest of the keep, off Cullen went with Bull, Solas, and Varric for company this time. Back into the sandbox.

Varric was a welcome addition on this outing. It was easy to relax around the dwarf and it was slightly reassuring to only feel magic from Solas once they left the keep. The elf was fairly liberal with his use of magic, more so than Vivienne, but not unreasonably so. Cullen experienced a definite ease in tension for only having one mage with him out here in the wild and unsupervised dunes. He supposed that he was the supervision, per se, being an ex-templar, but then again, if there was ever a need for a templar kind of supervision, he was incapable of enforcing anything like that now. That was probably a greater part of what made him so uneasy travelling between Solas and Vivienne.

It wasn’t the fact that every time he looked at Solas, he had the strange and uneasy niggling sensation that the man was not what he seemed. He didn’t have enough eyes, for one thing. As strange as that thought was. He resolved to stay vigilant.

Then again, magic did not really affect him like it used to. So many things didn’t.

He had lots of time to think while they travelled over the endlessly shifting sands. It was useful, being able to do nothing but think for hours while they moved along. When his companions were not chatting and distracting him.

He had a lot of things to think about. So many that it was difficult to choose where to start much of the time.

Occasionally he would glance over at Bull and think about what happened between them. It had all been so clear when the hormones and pheromones were thick in his bloodstream and his mind was full of heat and his body was wrung out and deliciously spent and tired. It all made perfect sense. Now that he was clear headed, it was far less certain.

He thought that there should have been some…change. That was how these things usually worked, didn’t they? There was supposed to be some sort of emotional connection when you did the kinds of things that Bull had done with him. Some effect. Right now, on his horse, in this saddle, looking out at this desert, Cullen was hard pressed to pinpoint anything that was different from yesterday. He’d been introduced to some concepts that he’d not known before and he was open to doing it again, but other than that, he couldn’t really say much had changed. It wasn’t as if he expected overnight change, but it just seemed a little lacking.

Why?

He wasn’t really sure.

“Hey. Thedas to Inquisitor. Whatcha thinking so hard about up there?”

Varric’s teasing broke through his ponderous thoughts and he blinked over at the dwarf and was unsure how to respond for a moment. He was quite certain that he should not answer that question honestly. This was not a proper topic for open conversation. His mind worked swiftly to find an answer that was not dishonest, but also not indecent. He had been working hard at trying to temper and curate his responses to others. To try to act as normal as possible. He had no idea if he was succeeding or not. Asking for feedback was just as awkward to those around him as saying the wrong thing was.

“I was just pondering emotions.” He finally replied.

“Hah! Getting philosophical, are we?” Varric grinned over at him. “Do you have something specific on your mind or are you just waxing poetic about your present situation?”

Tilting his head, Cullen considered Varric. Perhaps it would be good to get an alternate opinion. “How integral are emotions for meaningful personal interactions?”

Varric snorted and shook his head. “Aaah. Well, I did ask. I should have expected it would be a hard question. It came from you, after all! I guess it depends on what kind of interaction it is.” Varric shrugged while he thought about it. “See. There’s some stuff that I’d say doesn’t require emotions at all. Like buying groceries. Or working a job. Smithing a sword or shoeing a horse. Haggling on a price. Emotions can get in the way when you’re just doing something simple or mindless. They can get in the way when you’re doing something important too. Then again, emotions can also make things better. Like when people say that something was ‘made with love’. Sure, it’s a little cliche, but people like that kind of cliche. It makes everything just that much better or more meaningful.”

“They complicate matters.” Cullen agreed with that small wrinkle on his brow.

“Well. Yeah.” Varric hedged. “They definitely do, but it’s a complication that we usually want. I mean, depending on the emotions involved.”

“Dwarves are supposedly cut off from the Fade, but you have emotions.” Cullen pondered. “Solas compares me to you, but that seems flawed. Dwarves thrive regardless of the Fade.”

“Eh. Solas has a lot of weird theories about stuff.” Varric said with a completely noncommittal smile. “What do you think, Cullen? You may not have emotions like you did, but you’ve still got all kinds of opinions of your own. I know that.”

“Yes.” Cullen agreed again. “I know right from wrong.”

“Right.” Varric leaned toward him. “You remember what life was like. Before. Right?”

“I do. Yes. I know what my preferences in situations were and I know logically why I felt that way, I just don't feel it anymore.” Cullen nodded, fully engaged with the dwarf. Waiting for his point.

“Well.” Varric paused and then shrugged. “Do you think you feel nothing? Or you just…can't process it anymore or something?”

Cullen didn’t answer right away, but that wrinkle deepened while he pondered that. As he already knew from the rifts, his emotions about the things that happened to him waited to reveal themselves when he came near one. As soon as he thought of the thing that happened, whatever thing it might be, the emotions were there and washed over him and there was not a thing he could do about it. As if they had been there the entire time. If dreams and emotions were directly linked to magic, and being tranquil was the absence of magic, then that suggested that everyone else, even mundanes, all had some level of magic within them with mages having the most. Did that mean extremely dull and boring people who lacked ambition had the least?

That seemed like an oversimplification.

What about extremely dull and boring mages? Where did they fit in, because he knew they existed. Might that be the source of the common phrase that someone could ‘bring magic into your life’? Maybe it was more of a question of capacity or intensity? Was there such a thing as less emotion? Less magic? Well, of course there was. Mages were constantly preoccupied with rating their ability against one another.

As for emotions… There were things that he once cared very little about and things that were once very important to him. He knew that those things still held that importance, they didn't lose their value just because his feelings changed. So he still paid special attention to those things. Those things hadn't fundamentally changed. Only he had fundamentally changed. He knew that others still held those things in high regard, but he just did not feel that intensity about them anymore. Was it not the same intensity or none at all? That seemed like a question he ought to be able to answer, but he couldn't. Did that explanation fit? Did it make sense? All of this shot through his mind in a blur and came to naught.

He honestly could not decide. How could you judge something when you no longer understood the rule or the measurement by which it should be judged? “I don’t know. I just… I can’t answer that.”

Varric eyed him curiously and then shrugged. “Heh, well, when you can, let me know. I’m really interested to hear that answer.”

~ * ~

The mine was not pleasant by any stretch of the imagination. The way these Venatori seeded the tunnels was much the same as it had been in the reports about the Emprise du Lion and other places he’d read about. Bodies. Planted with red lyrium and then staked or chained down alive so that they could grow.

Templars, mangled and disfigured to the point that they could no longer move, cut down or abandoned in the shafts. Left to fade away alone and then to crystalize. Cullen knew what it was like to be abandoned. It was not something that anyone deserved. It was shameful and wretched in the mine. Even emotionless as he was, he was not blind to that. These were terrible things the Venatori and Red Templars were doing in the name of the Elder One. They were wrong. They had to be stopped.

It was especially clear when they encountered a rift in the area. Oh how he was developing an aversion to those. They hit him hard every time and he did not like it. He did not like the bombardment of put off emotions that he did not know what to do with. He was not at ease with the epiphanies and realizations and sometimes incomprehensible memories and experiences that crossed the barrier of the Veil to be shared with him.

As he stood before the first rift they found, he found himself preoccupied and distracted, his attention slipping away from the threats of the demons to search out The Iron Bull instead. When he found him, his gaze stuck there and…and…and there was so much… He couldn’t drag his gaze away. It was as if he were gaze-locked by the Qunari. So much was there that he could not wrap his mind around it all or hope to even start sorting any of it out. Bull had to come to his rescue because he just was not able to function at that first rift. Not at all.

Bull pulled him around, hands heavy on his shoulders. “Hey, bud. You okay? What’s up? Is there something I can do?” He was genuinely worried by how frozen Cullen seemed to be.

For Cullen’s part, all he could manage was to stare up at him for a while longer. It took every ounce of will for him to try to separate himself from the torrent of emotions that had crashed into him and had his heart hammering in his chest and his blood pounding in his ears. He licked his lips, trying to find enough saliva to wet his tongue.

“I… I think… You’ve already…done it…” Was all he could bring himself to say before he finally forced himself to pull away so that he could close the rift.

Bull stared after him and his single eye widening at those words. Had he? That statement sounded very pointed and certain, but he wasn’t certain what Cullen actually meant by it. What exactly had he done? No matter how he asked him afterward, Cullen didn’t seem to be able to explain his words either. Bull could not tell if that was purposeful or because he truly couldn’t grasp even his own meaning without the emotion that spurred those words to start with.

Each time Cullen connected to the Fade it changed him just a little bit. He had no control over it whatsoever. Even though all this was supposedly supposed to ‘fix’ him according to everyone, it was very disconcerting no matter how he looked at it. So he chose not to think too hard on it, to not focus overly intently on those incomprehensible and undeniable things that were shared. Not there, he put it all off to examine later. Instead he turned all his focus fully onto the problems at hand and tried to ignore the mental turmoil.

These lackeys to the Elder One were a scourge and this red lyrium was a plague. It had to be dealt with. This plague could not be allowed to spread throughout the land. He preferred to fight monsters, but this resolution made it easier to mow through everything in his path without so much ethical concern. He was truly beginning to understand some of his elder counterpart’s unforgiving harshness now. He hadn’t lived in a land of monsters in Kirkwall, but was surrounded by people that acted like them. His older self might have become numb to such things, but he wasn’t.

When he strode out of that mine and back into the light of day, flanked by his companions, all of them bloodied and grim and tired, his serious expression very much resembled that of his elder predecessor. His serious expression didn’t change when he was congratulated for being able to even navigate the mine in the first place. A part of him wondered if he would ever be able to get clean of the things he experienced down there.

If the option had been available, he wouldn’t have hesitated to collapse the entire complex of tunnels and bury everything inside it forever.

~ * ~

To set camp they stumbled upon an oasis where they slew yet another of those feral pet giants the Venatori were dragging around with them. Once the water cleared from the muck the giant had spread around, Cullen waded in and took great pains to try to make himself feel clean again.

After all the nearby horrors were stopped and once all the things he could not abide were slain, it was a surprisingly pleasant place, this oasis. Valor had an exceptional time stalking hyenas and giant spiders in the sandy canyons while the rest of them settled down for the evening.

“Where in the world are all these giants coming from? I’ve never seen anything like them before. Are they native to Orlais?” Cullen mused out loud with a thoughtful expression while he soaked in the now crystal clear water and just watched the rainbows that floated in the mist of the nearby waterfall.

“Giants are known to make their homes in the Dales. That is most likely where they were captured and brought from.” Solas offered matter of factly.

Cullen paused as a flurry of not yet fully absorbed information suddenly clicked into place and then nodded his understanding. That was happening more and more often to him. The blinding flurry of thoughts and images he was constantly surrounded with had begun to thin slightly as things began to find a suitable truth or fact to bind to within him. The tiny island of reality that he stood upon was beginning to grow into something he could actually navigate. “Ah. I see. That would be part of why we are pushing Inquisition presence into the Dales. I know that we are hoping to attend to some of the upheaval that is occurring there before the peace talks commence. Now I see why there is such a rush.”

Varric and Solas continued the conversation without him. He only half listened to their comments and musings while they bathed, just as hopeful of coming out clean again as he was. For his part, Cullen decided that he was very much done this evening. They had been here for a few days and he had seen enough. He’d told Bull that he hoped to have different images floating around in this chaotic flurry of a mind, but he hadn't intended them to be more death and horror.

It seemed that he really had no choice in the matter, so he chose to sit here in this pretty pool and just watch the sparkling waterfall instead.

He was still watching the mist as the sun dropped below the distant horizon and the pretty rainbows dimmed and went out, just relaxing and letting sore muscles be soothed. Varric was the first to leave the pool, complaining of the cold. Then Solas took his leave to return to the nearby scout camp. Cullen didn’t see what the fuss was. To him, the water might be a little crisp, but it was perfectly comfortable and did not seem all that cold. Then again, he’d grown up taking dips in frigid ponds and swimming in Lake Calenhad which was cold even in the summertime. He barely felt the cold of this pool. Also, he apparently had some resistance to cold left over from one of the demons he'd harbored. He stayed comfortably right where he was until Bull swam over.

The first thing he saw were those horns spearing through the water beneath the surface and for a second it was a startling sight. Even though he knew it was Bull, it still made him tense. The Qunari’s great shadow beneath the water looked like some hulking sea creature until he surfaced with a splash, shaking his horns dry and smirking at Cullen. What a strange thought to have.

When Bull stood up straight the water was barely deep enough for modesty. Despite himself, Cullen’s eyes settled on the solid expanse of scarred skin and muscle that covered Bull’s stomach and obliques. He’d seen plenty of Bull after being constantly in the man’s company, but this time he felt a familiar twist in his low belly. A thought flashed through his mind, one that wasn’t his but came to him as a memory. It was of a hand with a green-golden glow that both was and was not his hand sliding along a taut muscular stomach. But the skin covering that stomach was an olive color and there was a downy trail of pure white hair leading downward from the naval and framed by prettily curving lines of lyrium.

It took a true act of will to drag his gaze away from that inner image and then up Bull’s chest instead of further downward. When he met Bull’s gaze he found him just smirking back. The realization finally came that the large Qunari was purposefully putting himself on display. That directly suggested he wanted him to look, didn’t it? But why? Was he testing Cullen? Was he doing it to see what he did? Was he doing it because he was genuinely flirting with him and possibly wanted to do more? A flash of interest suddenly sparked through Cullen at that last thought.

“Hey, boss. It’s time to eat. I don’t know about you, but I worked up a big appetite today.”

“Then we should attend to that. I could eat.” Cullen slid from the rock shelf he was resting on and stood. The water reached up to his low ribs.

They began to wade through the pool toward the shore. Cullen moved slowly as he picked his way carefully over the slippery algae covered stones, trying to keep his balance. When Bull’s large hand landed on his shoulder to lend some stability he flinched and then glanced apologetically at Bull. The big man just smiled and shook his head, showing he still wasn’t offended. They threw on just the minimum pants for modesty and joined the scouts for dinner. While they ate, Bull’s leg gently rested against Cullen’s and skillfully managed to keep the majority of his attention the entire time until they retired to their tent.

Their packs were on opposite sides of the tent and the bedrolls in the center. Cullen looked up to see Bull eyeing him with a considering smirk. “So.” He said and just left the meaning hanging there unspoken.

Cullen had no idea what that meant. “So?” He asked curiously.

“So what do you have in mind tonight?” That smirk narrowed. “I can smell the horny from here. Actually, I’ve been smelling it on you ever since that last rift that you didn’t want to talk about. So, what’s up?”

That made Cullen pause. “You can tell by my scent?” He hadn’t realized that Bull had such enhanced senses that he could smell his confused arousal, but now that he did, he filed the information away. Some of the things that his remnant and Fenris were getting up to in the Fade were…quite friendly. He couldn’t blame them, he also received the knowledge that Fenris was not faring all that great there. It was wearing on the elf.

“Yep. I can tell.” Bull leaned in closer, that smug smile still in place. “You know what else I can tell?”

“What else can you tell?” Cullen swallowed reflexively at the closeness, holding Bull’s steady gaze. Feeling his body heat so close, like a furnace. Wondering if the big man gave off pheromones like he apparently did and if he could somehow sense and respond to those without being able to smell them.

“I can tell it hasn’t gone away.” Bull made a point of leaning down, nuzzling his nose against Cullen’s brow and sniffing him, thick gray fingers carded teasingly through his hair which had gone quite curly from their dip in the mineral rich water. “And it’s only getting stronger right now.”

Leaning into that nice touch, Cullen’s eyelids lowered, golden lashes partially concealing the way his pupils expanded in the dim light of the tent. Definitely reacting to the teasing. “Then I shouldn’t need to ask you to act on it.”

Bull smirked wider. “I don’t need you to ask, no.” His fingers tangled into Cullen’s hair and tipped his head back, baring his throat as he rubbed his rough cheek along Cullen’s, feeling how soft and smooth the freshly shaved skin was. Then against the sensitive skin of Cullen’s neck. Breathing deeply of his thickening scent. Letting just a hint of teeth brush skin without actually nipping, feeling Cullen twitch.

“I require that you do.” He rumbled into Cullen’s ear.

When Bull pulled back, he was pleased to see that Cullen’s eyes had fallen closed and he was already biting the inside of his lip in tense expectation. Oh, yeah, that look was so good on him. Bull drew back and just waited for the knight to decide what he wanted to do about this still uncertain situation between the two of them. Bull made absolutely no more overtures himself now. He was leaving it completely to Cullen to decide what he wanted. If he wanted anything. He sure smelled like he did. They hadn’t messed around since the night before they left the keep and that was days ago.

“This would be much easier if you just…took the cues I don’t know how to express.” Cullen finally said with a very slight huskiness in his voice.

“Heh. Yeah. It would.” Bull agreed, his smirk never faltering. “But then there’d be room for questions and doubt and I’m just not into that. I’ve always kept things clear between us. Someone else would probably be fine with it, but that’s not how I do things.” He caught Cullen’s chin in his hand and tilted it up dominantly, but that was all. “Why don’t you make this easier on both of us and tell me what you’ve decided will happen tonight?”

“What I’ve decided?” Cullen stared up at him. “.........Just decide? Just like that?”

Bull chuckled. “Well. There’ll be other steps, sure, but that’s the most important one. Yep. You just make a decision and then tell me what it is. You’re decisive. I definitely know that about you. So, what’ll it be?”

What would it be? Options slid through Cullen’s mind, options that he hadn’t even realized existed such a short time ago. Now, he had thoughts and images and urges. He followed one urge and slid his hands up that broad gray chest to grip Bull’s powerful trapezius muscles and he rose up onto his toes so he and Bull were as close to eye to eye as they could be. There was nothing barring the way between them, nothing holding him back but himself and his own indecision. Bull was right about one thing, he was a decisive sort, especially when there were cut and dry choices placed before him. He couldn’t see any downsides or any negatives to the options at hand, there was absolutely no necessary reason for him to abstain. The choice was absolutely his to make and he did completely trust Bull with this. So, he decided he wouldn’t abstain.

He pressed his chest to Bull’s and stretched up to kiss him, eyes closing, pulling himself against the larger man. He lifted one thigh up to hook around Bull’s hip. Bull caught his thigh and held it, so Cullen pulled himself up, climbing to wrap his other thigh around Bull’s waist. Suddenly Bull had his arms full of ex-templar with an unmistakable growing hardness pressing against his abs. Cullen curled his arms around Bull’s neck and kissed him again, drawing a deep, approving rumble from the big man.

Cullen spoke huskily when the kiss finally broke. “You’re going to show me the real thing this time, not just use a toy, and you’re going to finish too this time.”

“Mmm. I am?” Bull asked innocently, large hands palming Cullen’s firm ass and pulling him in to grind against his stomach.

“Yes.” Cullen responded without a hint of hesitation now that he had begun, pelvis arching in response. “Ahh… Twice.”

“Twice?!” Bull grinned cheekily, faking shock and astonishment at the very idea. “You’re sure about that?”

“Yes.” Cullen nodded seriously and nipped at Bull’s lip, thighs squeezing around his thickly muscled waist. “At least twice. I'm sure we’ve done more than that before. You’re going to fuck me so well that Harding won’t be able to make her report to me tomorrow without stuttering uncomfortably and she will think twice about flirting with me anymore.”

Her playfulness with him made receiving her reports rather difficult to navigate in his present situation, so far she seemed to take his difficulty as discomfort on his part and just teased him more for it which made it even harder. Maybe this idea would put a stop to that.

“Now, that’s a tall order. Harding ain’t no innocent little lass.” Bull purred, but wasn’t displeased in the slightest by that decision or by the orders or by the armful of very willing warrior that he now held. “I guess I better get started, huh?”

“Yes, you had better.”

~ * ~

“.........So………”

Varric started as they rode their horses across the seemingly never ending sea of sand again. He let the word hang in the air between them for an extra long moment until Cullen looked over at him expectantly. “So?”

“You and Bull, huh?” He continued slowly. He raised an eyebrow when Cullen just blinked at him, as if he didn’t understand the question or was waiting for further clarity on what he was actually asking. “How does that work, exactly?”

Cullen just considered Varric for a long moment and tried to decide what the most appropriate answer to his question might be. “It works very well.” He finally responded.

“Now, that’s not what I meant and I’m pretty sure you know that.” Varric said dryly back. “I meant…with your being…how you are right now…”

Cullen shrugged at him. “You are the one that said that emotional investment was not required for any number of different interactions.”

“Yeah, but…” Varric seemed to hit a wall with what he wanted to say or how he wanted to argue. “But there’s some things that kind of…well… I mean… I guess… But…come on, Curly, when it comes to interactions between two consenting adults…how does that work when you’re…… When you’re…what you are…?”

Cullen just tilted his head and raised a brow of his own, just emulating the look that Varric was now giving him, voice dry and poised. “I’m tranquil, Varric. I’m not dead. Everything is physically fully functional, I assure you.”

“Ack! Not what I meant! Again! You’re doing that on purpose! That absolutely is sarcasm, damn it!” For a moment Varric was absolutely sure Cullen was fucking with him.

It wasn’t a stretch. It was something he would have done before, at least… He was…mostly sure…sort of sure…okay, he suspected…strongly…that Cullen knew how to annoy or manipulate them all and was still actively saying things, tongue-in-cheek, specifically to do exactly that. It did not matter that Cullen had no reason to do that or even any motivation to do it now. He didn’t get any fun or amusement from it, he wasn’t hiding anything anymore or misdirecting…was he? He didn't even remember that stuff he tried to hide before. It totally did not make sense that he would do any such thing as a tranquil person, but damn it! Sometimes Varric just couldn’t push off the feeling that Cullen was using his present state as a platform of innocence while he strung them all along! His phrasing and word choices were so often just so loaded it defied any other explanation. Not to mention the fact that was something Cullen might do just to throw people off kilter…except… Cullen had no sense of humor now and nothing to hide and he wasn’t deriving any satisfaction from it, so Varric was absolutely just being paranoid and delusional. It was crazy. He threw up his hands in frustration.

“You do seem to be sitting a bit gingerly in the saddle today, Inquisitor. Are you sure you’re not in need of any healing?” Solas commented idly from the other side of Varric. The way the elf was looking off at the desert and feigning complete nonchalance fairly screamed that he was also being dryly witty in his own particular way.

“As long as we don’t gallop anywhere, I will sit perfectly fine. Thank you for your concern.” Cullen assured him lightly. “I feel very well and quite content.”

Varric glanced sidelong between Cullen and Bull and the conversation petered out for a little while as they rode.

~ * ~

“.........So………”

The dwarf could not help himself. Expectant silence hung between them in the bright desert sunshine again. He just could not bring himself to drop it. “Got enough sleep, at least?”

Bull just chuckled, sitting very comfortably upon his giant royal charger and completely at ease with the topic. “Not enough sleep by half and I didn’t mind at all. This guy here?” He gestured at Cullen. “He’s just sooo bossy! Last time I was given such explicit directions, I was with the Tamassrans. I am definitely not complaining.”

“I will be sure to remember that you like being given explicit directions.” Cullen commented without concern or embarrassment or much tone at all.

Varric let out a great heaving sigh and finally decided he was not going to get anywhere with them. “So, Chuckles. How did you sleep last night?”

“I think it’s safe to say that I didn’t get any more sleep than you did, Varric. For the exact same reasons. I must say that I am far less content about it than either of our companions here are.” Solas commented airily.

“If it really bothered you, you could have easily erected a sound barrier.” Cullen responded helpfully.

Bull let out a sharp laugh. “Hah! He’s right!” Bull grinned at the elf and dwarf. “Hey! Maybe our friends were busy erecting something els-...”

“No, we are not going there!” Varric hurriedly cut off Bull. “Nevermind! Just pretend I never said anything! I’m done!”

“I’m just saying, there’s no shame in taking a little enjoym-...” Bull tried to continue with a grin, but Varric was having none of it.

“No! New subject! Somebody! Solas! Please!”

“You still have not answered the question I posed to you before about where you got the name Bianca from.” Solas said just as helpfully as Cullen had.

“Not happening.” Varric cut Solas off too. “Why are there never any dragons breathing fire down your neck when you want one? Speaking of which! Where is this dragon lair that you were talking about earlier, Tiny? Aren’t we close to it yet?”

“Oh! Are we talking about dragons now?” Bull perked right up. “Great! Have I told you some of my favorite dragon facts? Did you know that drakes have a penis that is longer than my arm!” Bull enthusiastically stretched his very long, very large right arm out with a balled fist at the end and pointed at his shoulder to emphasize the length while he waggled his eyebrows at Varric. “I mean, they’ve got to, right? You know how big a High dragon is and all High dragons are female. If you want to gain attention, you gotta be able to prove your worth. Those big ladies need something with some heft. Eh? Eh? Can you picture that?”

“...I…” Varric answered heavily. “...do not want to picture that.” He sighed so loudly. “Thank you, for that. I really needed to have that image implanted into my writer’s brain. I don’t know what I’m going to do with it, but it lives there now.”

“You’re welcome!”

~ * ~

When they found the dragon nest, Bull identified it as an Abyssal High dragon. A fire breather. It was huge and extraordinarily dangerous looking.

Cullen frowned as he took it in over the distance. “This seems inadvisable.” He suggested calmly. “How many dragons am I supposed to have hunted up to now?”

“So far we’ve only done a couple.” Bull answered as he stared hungrily at the monstrous creature. “But by the time we get out of this country, I’m thinking it could be closer to nine. Orlais seems to be teeming with dragons lately.” When he smiled it was all teeth.

“Hmm.” Cullen mused. “Let us clearly lay out our strategy before we go any closer.”

Bull grinned and threw an arm around Cullen’s shoulders, giving him a playful squeeze. “Hey! That’s so much better than how nervous and grouchy you were the last couple times! I like this fearless enthusiasm!”

Cullen went with the half hug and he barely even flinched, but eyed Bull sidelong. “It is more that I want it all solidly planted in my mind so that I can have the highest chance of surviving.” Cullen corrected him. “However, I can see that you are very enthusiastic.”

“Oh, you don’t know the half of it yet.” Varric added with a sardonic laugh of his own.

He did not know the half of it, but it was not all that long before he found out.

Everyone survived felling the dragon, which was the primary goal, Solas even seemed to have an exhilarating time of it. The dragon smelled truly terrible and the blood was caustic and sticky. Thankfully, Solas was able to cleanse the sticky, sulfurous stuff away from them without too much trouble. Once clean and gathering his strength again, Cullen surveyed the corpse and noticed that The Iron Bull was nowhere in sight. When he asked if anyone saw him leave, Varric didn’t bother to look around and just shrugged.

“Oh, he’s around. He’ll come back when he’s done celebrating our victory.” Varric said without any concern. Cullen turned as if he might search him out and took a second look around. “I wouldn’t, if I were you.” Varric warned him. “You might see something scarier than a dragon dick taller than me.”

“After what we heard last night, I’m certain that the Inquisitor is already acquainted with The Iron Bull’s most intimidating assets.” Solas commented with a wry twist of his lips. Cullen ignored the comments as he looked off, trying to guess which direction Bull must have gone, then went to search the big man out without a word.

“See? He is as fearless as any tranquil is expected to be. He also seems to have more confidence in his abilities than he has self preservation instincts. You saw him stand completely still and allow the dragon to nearly stomp him flat? Only to slice cleanly through its claws at the last second when it tried.”

“Yeah, I know. He’s always liked doing things his own way. That was pretty ballsy and it did bring it down, but I thought for sure we were going to have to scrape him off the rocks when it fell.” Varric muttered back.

Valor was nearby sprawled out on his belly on the loose rocks with one of those big talons Cullen severed, gnawing contentedly away as he worked at cracking the thick bones open to get to the juicy marrow hidden within.

Preoccupied, Cullen did not see his other two companions share a look or hear Solas respond. He definitely didn't see Varric’s bewildered nod of agreement. His mind was on other things entirely. When he found The Iron Bull on the far side of the dragon, he was running his hands over the huge beast’s beautiful razor edged scales and Cullen just observed the obvious adoration for a long moment.

“The Qunari revere dragons.”

Bull glanced over, unsurprised to see him. He'd heard him coming on the rocky loose shale. “Yeah, we do. They represent the ultimate power and chaos, but it is a chaos that needs to be controlled. If you don't you get what happened in Crestwood where livestock were decimated and people started feeding the dragon to appease it. Like some pet god. Doesn't work. You can’t keep a pet god. Eventually it will eat you and shit on your house.”

Cullen stopped beside him and looked unabashedly at the way Bull’s normally baggy pants pushed out in front. Now he understood why Varric tried to warn him off. “You clearly have a dragon fetish.” The discovery didn’t bother him whatsoever. Rather it had the opposite effect.

A loud and mirth filled laugh barked out and Bull nodded with a grin. “Guilty as charged. Don't mind me.”

Cullen moved closer and rested a hand on Bull’s thickly armored belt and looked up with curious interest. “Do you want any help? Or company?” The adrenaline that still hadn’t quite left his bloodstream from the battle spiked just slightly when he felt just how hot Bull’s body heat was, he could feel it radiating right through his belly armor. Bull seemed to still be quite worked up from the fight.

The offer sparked a sudden and intense gleam in the big man’s single eye and Bull’s focus became much sharper. Definitely predatory. “Damn. I don't know about that, Cullen. I can get pretty…uh…intense after a battle. Maybe this isn't the best time or place. I wouldn’t want to get carried away.”

Cullen could feel the shift in Bull‘s stance, it came with an impossible flash of even more heat from him. Almost like cracking open the door on a blazing furnace. It sent a shiver of tension through him. “Are you certain? I believe I can handle it. If it is something you'd like.”

The Iron Bull stared at Cullen and real hunger slid into his gaze. “Fuck.” He cursed in a deep baritone, the stony hazel color of his eye darkened noticeably. “Don’t offer that, bud. I won't be able to resist an offer like that. Not right now.”

Cullen regarded the seriousness in Bull’s tone and the way it clashed with the heat of his gaze and the threat and promise were both very clear. It made his heart skip a beat and quicken. His hand slid up to Bull’s chest, feeling the pounding of his massive heart. Bull’s pulse was racing. “The offer stands. I trust you.”

A great growl rattled the air that could have rivaled any drake's and caused Cullen’s tension to spike and spread like a warm flush through his extremities. Then Bull took hold of him and walked him backwards until his back pressed against a collection of large rocks. He pressed in close and breathed in the heady musk that was rising in Cullen’s scent and, with deliberate slowness, began to unclasp Cullen’s chestplate. He was usually good with restraint, but right now Bull was about at his limit and this offer was, as he said, irresistible.

“This all needs to come off. I don't want to tear anything.”

Cullen swallowed once, realizing the probable intensity of what he just volunteered for and quickly began to unbuckle and strip off his armor. The instant he was able to drag his tunic off, Bull’s hands were on him. Rough and hungry and primal, unwilling to wait even though there were still his boots and greaves to deal with. When Cullen bent down to loosen those clasps, Bull’s hot hands turned him and pulled his hips around.

“Keep going.” Bull ordered as his hands moved ravenously over pale skin. It took far less effort to tug his own large armored belt loose and let it drop to the ground in a solid jangle of pink metal and dragon scale. His baggy breeches were even easier to cast off.

The job of removing Cullen’s last pieces of armor was made harder when his pants were peeled down and thick fingers began to tease him. He fumbled while Bull took up position behind him with a rustle of material and then there was the silky slide of his almost burning hot cock on his skin. Bull let out a groan and suddenly there was a hot splash of slick precum at the base of Cullen’s spine. The big man really was not waiting for him to finish undressing. The sickness was gathered up by thick fingers and pressed inside him and Bull began to prepare him just like that. He really was struggling to hold back even as much as he did.

“Keep going.” He repeated when Cullen paused, completely derailed from what he was doing by those cleverly desperate fingers spreading him.

Cullen gasped and moaned as he was worked open. He bit his lip and did his best to obey, one hand braced on the rock and the other continuing to fumble the last of his clothing off. Finally his pants and smalls were kicked away and who knew what condition they were in in his haste to get them off.

Then Bull had no more restraint left. He was already breathing hard, breath blasting like his namesake, hot and huge and bearing down on him. He pulled Cullen’s back against his chest and lifted him right up off his feet.

“Reach up and grab my horns.”

Cullen did as he was told, Bull lifted him high enough to reach, his hands were not quite able to wrap all the way around, but enough to hold himself up. The feel of those horns was familiar by now, hard and polished smooth. Then big strong hands cupped under his thighs, taking a secure hold to lift him up and Bull’s scorching erection nudged insistently at his cleft. He was slick already, but as soon as the thick head began to squeeze inside, there was another pump of molten slick precum to ease the way. Cullen cried out as he was suddenly filled, gravity pulling him down until Bull was seated. This felt so completely different from last night when everything was deliberate and slow, allowing him to keep pace while Bull was so careful with him. Right now Bull was very obviously struggling to keep himself in check. He felt larger, thicker, and so very hard, he really was worked up beyond anything Cullen had experienced from him yet.

Those strong hands lifted him and Cullen craned his neck to look down and he could see the massive cock that was sliding out of him. Part way down, toward the base was a large thick knot he hadn't expected to see. The sight pulled a surprised gasp from him and Bull froze, still breathing hard. Those horns tilted forward slightly, shifting him. “...you okay?”

Cullen nodded, looking back up at him, just slightly wide eyed and definitely breathless, but it was because of the surprising discovery he’d just made about Qunari more than anything else. That sight had sent a surprising thrill of adrenaline through him. “Yes.” Cullen took a deep breath and reasserted his grip on those handsome horns. “Go on. What are you waiting for?”

Another hungry growl filled the air and then Bull was moving in earnest, lowering him then lifting. Trying to go slow, but that only lasted seconds before Bull’s self control broke. Dropping faster, lifting again, dropping him to meet each thrust, growling his pleasure as the pace picked up and steadied. Grunting with each sharp, rough, single minded thrust. Losing himself completely in a rush of animalistic lust, rutting needfully into his willing partner. A partner that accepted this side of him just as readily as the civilized side he showed to all the rest of these soft ‘bas’. Cullen always liked this side of him before, and he still accepted it even now. Bull was all for that.

There was nothing to hold onto besides those horns, no control to be had at all, just the slide of that huge cock, the thud of that thick knot against his ass, already too thick to possibly fit, and the swing of his own erection as he was thoroughly and hungrily fucked. Cullen gasped and cried out loudly, toes curling as he gave over to the lack of control. Really felt it. Bull was fucking him like it was a driving need he couldn’t repress. Unthinking and unstoppable, a force of nature and instinct that he’d given himself over to, and it felt incredible.

Cullen’s head fell back on his chest and he stared up at The Iron Bull, there was sweat trickling along his gray skin, down his temple. One hand let go of a horn to touch Bull’s jaw, caressing along his cheek, brushing away the sweat and caressing the soft sensitive shell of a pointed ear. A spot where he recently learned Bull really liked being touched.

The reaction was immediate. Bull snarled and bucked sharply, thumping bodily against the stones as he lost balance, curling around him. He shifted them, planting his back securely against the large rocks and gripping Cullen’s hips with bruising force that would unquestionably leave marks later, his still booted feet digging into the stony ground. “Brace your feet on my knees.” He commanded and then he began to slam home with renewed desperation.

Cullen was barely able to comply before Bull lost all ability for speech at all and Cullen’s cries turned shrill and ecstatic. All he could do was hold on for dear life and it definitely wasn't a bad thing. No, not a bad thing at all. Not by a long shot. No, everything was perfect, even sore as he was from the night before, he wouldn’t pass this up.

If Varric and Solas could hear them on the far side of the great beast, they would probably have a few more things to say on the ride back, but neither he nor Bull cared whatsoever. It was the farthest thing from either of their minds right then.

Maybe this time Cullen might take that offer of healing.

But probably not.

~ * ~

~ * ~            ~ * ~            ~ * ~

~ * ~