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The Hands that Held Me Steady

Summary:

Ed returns to Winry, finally starting to think about a life outside of the rambling chaos he's used to. He wants to build his relationship with her. He knows she deserves a lover who will be present and consistent.

He won't repeat the cycle and leave her waiting indefinitely like his mother had once waited for Hohenheim.

It's time to come home, once and for all.

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It was Ed's first return to see Winry since he'd gone away after the promised day, leaving her with his awkward but sincere proposal of commitment. He'd decided to come back to see her only about 2 months later; she was back in Rush Valley at Atelier Garfiel for work, no shock.

He had told her he was coming beforehand as she'd requested, but hadn't yet mentioned why. You see, after Al's recovery of his body, Ed had finally started to grow more.

Not enough to fully catch up to Alphonse though, unfortunately. Seemed like he'd never get the chance to get ahead of Al at this rate; he was already almost an entire head above Ed, while Ed's own time for growth was almost over.

He'd still grown a significant amount in the brief time since he'd seen Winry last, and his automail leg was getting too short already. As a result he was off balance and uncomfortable, with a slightly limp gait.

In truth though, while he needed the updated leg, he more importantly needed to see her; the leg was just a good objective excuse to take a break, ultimately.

Maybe it was all he'd been through, but he craved that comfort, and wanted to develop the relationship he promised to her. Edward looked at the familiar storefront with a lopsided warm smile as he laid eyes on Winry, who hadn't yet noticed he'd arrived and was working diligently.

They called more often than ever now, but seeing her would always leave a different impact from just hearing her voice. His heart felt like putty being stretched in her direction every time he left and it had been that way for years, she was his pillar, the constant he could always return to.

Winry looked up after connecting her customer's arm, the man grunting in pain and holding his breath. Her eyes lit up as they fell on Ed and she smiled brightly, continuing her work.

"I'll be right with you, stranger." She sent a wink in his direction and Ed felt his face grow warm, recalling the last time he'd seen her, and their discussion before he'd left at the station. He took a seat, waiting patiently and simply observing as she finished up.

He always loved to watch her work, seeing the way she could meticulously build such intricate imitations of anatomy as naturally as she breathed. Like a benevolent goddess in the guise of a humble gearhead. It had always impressed Ed to see her clever capabilities, her skills and smarts reaching far beyond herself to help others.

Garfiel entered then to Ed's notice, seemingly returning from running some kind of errands.

"Winry you've been non-stop all day. Take an hour or five for a break sweetie for goodness' sake, you're a human being. I'll take over from here for a wh— oh hello, Ed dear.” Garfiel ushered Winry over, pushing her nearly into Ed's arms with a knowing smirk.

“Thank goodness you're here, she's working herself to the bone again! Please take this girl somewhere. Relax, catch up, yeah? Thanks honey.”

Winry giggled, clearly amused. "You heard 'em Ed, you should buy me some dinner."

He scoffed fondly under his breath with a smirk of familiar nostalgia, oh how he always missed this. Missed her.

"Of course. Let's go get some grub then, you lovable wallet-leeching menace." Ed snickered with the typical crooked smile, his demeanor soft and endeared in her presence.

Winry gave a beguiling grin and feigned an evil laugh, wrapping her elbow around Ed's right arm as they walked down the street to a nearby diner. Ed still wasn't fully used to having the arm's tactile senses back, feeling just how light and fragile his flesh and bone were in comparison to automail, feeling the senses of touch, pain, and pressure once again with that hand for the first time in years, etc.

As he felt Winry's arm entwined around his own firmly, strong but gentle, he felt a burst of gratitude in his chest that his arm felt her warmth.

He was reminded that they walked this way as children sometimes, arm in arm, and he felt a warmth in his chest at the memory and the juxtaposition to the present. Something so simple and seemingly mundane meant the world more than ever now.

"You're off balance. You've grown again." Winry stated plainly, something Ed couldn't place in her tone as she sized him up with the slightest hint of a flirtatious look, along with a tinge of admiration gleaming in her eye.

Then, the exhausted engineer in her couldn't help but to let out an exasperated sigh at the prospect of rebuilding Ed's limbs for the thousandth time.

"You need a new fitting don't you?"

Ed nodded apologetically with a sigh. Of course she noticed his slightly stunted gait right away. Even if his limp wasn't obvious or dramatic, she had learned enough at this point to do many simple diagnostics at a glance.

"Yeah, unfortunately. At least it's not 'cause it's broken this time." He laughed, shrugging in resignation. Win snickered, shaking her head.

"No kidding." Her eyes lingered on him for a moment with an expression Ed couldn't place.

"Hm. Your shoulders are wider again, too." She smiled to herself as if remembering something, and Ed felt his chest swell with a healthy dose of pride.

They entered the small open-front diner down the road and sat down at an outdoor bench table away from the few other patrons, Winry making a point to stay glued to Edward’s hip. He noticed her insistent proximity and it made him nervous in an excited way.

For all the years he avoided his feelings for her, her showing off their relationship subtly in this way now felt… indescribable. It wasn't something he was used to yet, but he wouldn't have it any other way now that he knew what it was like.

"How're you holding up with all this work anyway, Winry? Your business is exploding, you're really one of the biggest names in the game now." Ed began as they settled at their table, genuinely curious about her thriving success in the industry of automail.

"Oh you know, it's a lot but I wouldn't change it for the world. I'm helping so many people every day and learning all the time. It's nice to go back and forth between here and Resembool to spend time with Granny and Den, too." She fidgeted with her hands in her lap.

"Garfiel says I work too hard and sends me home every few weeks, maybe I do overwork, but I make sure I can rest sometimes. Paninya is a life saver, too. She's learned a lot around the shop."

Ed clicked his tongue at her, chuckling at that familiar statement. "You always say that you don't push yourself too hard but have you ever rested enough at home? You push until you crash and sleep a whole day, sometimes even when there's no urgent reason to. You should be more careful about your health, you're too selfless."

She scoffed, face reddening slightly. "You're one to talk, Mr. Vagrant Alchemist. You avoid resting so thoroughly that you've been voluntarily homeless for years, you burned your own house down! Even though you've always been welcome at Granny's, you stuck to the road."

Ed burst out laughing, taken aback by her outburst as he shook his head and caught his breath. "You got me there. Just try to be easy on yourself."

A staff member approached to take their orders, whisking through quickly to check each patron before disappearing behind the counter.

"What about you, Ed? Aren't you tired of traveling so much? You're not under the state's boot anymore, Al is safe in his body, and things have slowed down. You could take more time for yourself, you know. You don't rest enough either."

Edward hummed thoughtfully. "It's funny you should say that.”

Winry looked at him inquisitively, blinking in curiosity as he paused. "Well? Go on then."

Ed took a deep breath, smiling meekly. "I was thinking, I could tag along with you for a few months here and there, to make sure I'm really getting time to mentally recover fully after… everything.”

Winry’s face lit up at the thought. Ed grinned.

“While I'm at it, I can keep your workaholic butt in line and remind you not everything you work on is an emergency. Phone calls get old, and I can still do a lot of what I need to do, even if I'm stationary. It's mostly academic anyway. Why not… find somewhere comfortable and make travel as-needed?"

Winry stared at him for a moment before understanding fully dawned. "Are you being serious? Ed, of course you can stay with me as long as you want, whenever you want. Whether I'm here working or in Resembool. You're always welcome home with me. Always have been."

Something about her tone struck Ed in his heart and he felt his cheeks practically glowing with warmth as he replied, eyes averted. "You are my home, you know that. Wherever we happen to be."

It was her turn to be taken off guard, her eyes softening as she squeezed his arm a little tighter. "When did you get so corny huh, and in public? You big softie." She teased, leaning her cheek on his shoulder.

If Ed's face got any warmer he might start melting. "Shhshshhh c'mon Winry—"

She giggled under her breath, lightly batting his arm with her hand. "I'm allowed to tease you about it, you used to be so rude to me, you know."

He ducked his head, face flushed. "Fair enough, I have been known to be a pretentious asshole. You've had a mean streak yourself though, don't you think?"

"Yeah, we've been worse. At least we can own up to it, we're ahead of some people there." She chuckled, poking his cheek in a playful manner.
"It's okay though. We've matured a lot, after all."

Ed felt he could combust. She had adjusted quickly to giving affection apparently, but he was crumbling inside. If she only knew the full power she held.

(She does)

"Whatever you say.” He scoffed fondly, interlocking their fingers together on the bench beneath the table.

However, the waiter soon returned with their food and drink. Thus forcing them to let go of one another's hand to eat their meal, much to Edward's inner lament.

He felt so at peace like this with her, something about Winry always radiated a warmth and stability unique to her alone, grounding Ed firmly and holding him in so he wouldn't float off. The tether to his balloon.

It's why he'd avoided her when he was running from what he and Alphonse had done, like his mother's home, it would have tempted him to stay. Edward didn't feel like running anymore, he'd been growing tired of that for some time.

He'd always seek knowledge, travel, fulfill wanderlust and his interests; He'd never fully settle but that didn't mean he couldn't have a stationary home. If he kept up his wandering he worried that he might repeat his father's mistakes and miss so much of life.

A family, a home, domesticity he'd never known before. He was so close, and it felt like time to start the process of settling down from his years of hyperactive travel and avoidance.

After they'd eaten, they returned to the Atelier and Winry walked him into the back of the place, leading to a modest but pleasant guest room that Garfiel had set up for her some time ago.

"It's not exactly very big, but we can sit around in here for a bit since the shop is so crowded right now." Ed nodded, recalling that night before the promised day when he'd been in Winry's room back at Granny's with her. A brief flash of modesty crossed his face as he remembered being caught hiding in her room to eat.

He thought she was gone, and something about being in that room comforted him in her absence.

Secondhand embarrassment at the memory blazed on his cheeks but he shoved this down, nerves be damned.

They each took a seat on the edge of her bed and settled into a pleasant silence for a time, simply enjoying being together in quiet comfort and proximity.

"Hey, Ed?"

"Yeah, Winry?"

"I love you." Win spoke wistfully, twisting an idle finger through the end of Ed's ponytail.

"I love you too." Ed replied softly, quiet but without hesitation. Winry shifted closer with a happy sigh.

"Sometimes it doesn't feel real, you know. That you boys did it, that Al is ok, that you have your bodies back, mostly. That we're engaged, even if we're not in a hurry to have a ceremony." Her eyes lit up as she said this.

"So much has changed so fast after everything, I'm still getting used to it honestly. Even after more than two years."

Ed nodded in understanding, intertwining their fingers in his right hand. "I know how you feel. I'm still not even used to having my arm back, let alone the rest of the changes. I forget about pain being a thing for poor rightie sometimes and still have… accidents. Hasn't he been through enough?"

He chuckled as he spoke and gestured playfully with his recovered arm, making Winry snort laugh as both of them smiled down at their locked hands. "It's nice to be able to feel this, though." He said, lifting her hand in his for emphasis to kiss her knuckles, the beautiful scarred hands of a hard-working engineer and machinist.

"Ugh, you're getting sappier all the time, what am I going to do with you?" Winry teased, squeezing his hand. "It's cute though."

"Can you blame me? Step outside of yourself and look at how lucky I am then re-evaluate that statement. I'm a sap because you're… you. I've almost died too many times to not appreciate everything about you shamelessly. I adore you, ok? Took me long enough to admit it, now I'm going to wear it on my sleeve as best my emotionally constipated self can."

She laughed in exasperated confusion, not unlike her reaction to his proposal at the station. "Because I'm me? What does that even mean? Use an adjective, nerd. I know you read a lot of books. Do you need a thesaurus?" She joked, nudging his side once more and making him laugh.

"I mean that you're incredible, a genius in your craft, indescribably good at heart, and really close to perfect for a human being. That's all. You possess flaws because you're human, but they're just a speck next to the monument of your merit."

"Psh. Nobody's perfect, Ed."

"Well yeah, maybe not, but you're very close to it, trust me I'm an expert. Alchemists understand better than anyone the pursuit of perfection." Ed insisted playfully, tickling her side with a light jab.

Winry squeaked in helpless amusement as she wiggled away, only for him to gently rest his head against her neck. He gave a content sigh, soothed by the contact. She gave a fond, lovestruck giggle.

"Oh excuse me Dr. Expert Man, I had no idea you got a degree." She spoke with a soft tone that oozed affection despite making fun of him, all the while combing a hand through his ponytail.

"From the Izumi Curtis school of hard knocks, best of the best." He snickered.

She smiled warmly when he laid against her, even if he couldn't see it, cradling his head and leaning back against the headboard to allow him to get comfortable as they relaxed there for a few minutes.

Ed couldn't ask for a more perfect way to ease his tension from so much hectic and endless travel. The chaos was gone for a while, held at bay by Winry's comforting, steady, powerful presence. Her heartbeat pulsed near his ear and to his delight it was racing.

Winry jumped out of nowhere as if remembering something, suddenly shooting up off of the bed and knocking Ed aside. "Oh! Oh I forgot, you distracted me- stay right here."

She zoomed out into the shop and returned moments later after wildly looking around for her hidden surprise. Ed tilted his head in confusion, frowning slightly at having lost his resting spot. His eyes landed on the item in her hands. A small jewelry case, roughly the same size as the boxes that once contained her earrings.

"What's this?"

Winry hesitated with a sheepish expression, then held out her hands, opening it up to reveal two simple metallic bands, engraved with words inside and intricate knotwork on the outside.

Realization set in and Ed's face instantly burned with flush yet again as he leaned in to read them. Inside the bands where no one else would see were the words "Equivalent Exchange" in tedious, finely carved print. He fought the urge to laugh at the thought of her etching the words with that focused expression she gets, using a scope to see the fine detail.

"And here you said the equivalent exchange analogy in my proposal was nonsense. Who's talking nonsense now?" He grinned, gently taking the case from her to appreciate the work. "You made these?”

"I did. I even melted down some small parts from your first automail arm for the metal. I found it packed away at Granny's in keepsakes and thought… you know.” She shrugged, unsure how to elaborate.

“Equivalent exchange can mean so many things to me. Those words are always going to take me back to that last moment at the station now, and they'll always make me think of you. Besides, it does suit us, after all. We balance one another out."

She rubbed her neck nervously, smiling proudly at him as Ed took them out of the box, rotating them in his hand. He held out his other hand for Winry's and she placed her left hand in his to allow him to slide her ring on.

They had agreed they weren't in a big rush for the marriage part, but after all they'd been through, the years of knowing each other, they felt completely comfortable with planning for it eventually as they took the time to further develop this new side of their bond. Ultimately the life partners part mattered more than the spouse part, in their unconventional relationship model.

"They're perfect for us, I think." Ed said in shared pride, sliding his own on and smiling at his hand. "Making them from my scrapped arm was a hell of an idea, too. You're so creative."

She sat back down next to him again, leaning back into the headboard and opening her arms. "Now, where were we? C'mere you.” She invited, flapping her hands to beckon him forward.

Ed smiled, not hesitating to take his spot resting against her shoulder once more. She seemed to know how badly he needed that physical comfort, and he was grateful for how well she knew him. He pressed a single light kiss to her jaw before nuzzling into her shoulder peacefully.

They talked about whatever for a while, weaving through random subjects just to listen to the other's voice, and before they realized, it had grown dark out.

Next thing Winry knew, Ed dozed off with his arms wound tightly around her and his face buried against her neck, holding on like his life depended on it, and she wouldn't have traded that moment of peace for anything as she listened to his tranquil breaths.

They needed to start on measuring for his new fit, but it could wait for tomorrow since they'd let it get so late already. She took down his ponytail for him to prevent a headache, brushing her hands through his hair lovingly as he murmured sleepy nonsense under his breath. She cautiously braided his hair back for him like he used to wear it, thinking it more comfortable for sleeping in.

She ended up electing to just not move after that, and they slept through the night close together.

 

The next day they started on measurements for Ed's leg immediately. Winry rushed him out of bed in the morning, excited to work on him as usual. Meanwhile he sat dazed and half asleep in his seat. He complied with little protest though, ready to get it started so it would be done faster.

To his amusement, Winry had absolutely insisted he had to be shirtless even if she wasn't working on his arm anymore.

"Jokes on you, pretty boy, you being shirtless half the time has been part of my payment for years." She remarked in a completely deadpan voice. She sat ahead of him with his leg stretched out for measuring, not looking up from her work.

Her cracking such a flirtatious joke in that stoic tone while she was focused intently on measuring his calf really added a layer of humor to the scenario that almost made Ed laugh louder than it had any right to. Or was she joking at all?

Ed feigned a surprised gasp. "Are you saying you've been checking me out for years and I didn't notice? Who was gonna tell me?" Winry snickered under her breath.

"Oh Ed, if only you knew." He rolled his eyes with a chuckle, reclining against his hand on the chair's arm to get comfortable for however long he ended up sitting there.

"What's that s'posed to mean?" Ed inquired.

Winry only laughed with no further comment. No matter where he ended up in life, he always ended up in a chair with Winry putting him back together. She held him together in more ways than one, really.

After their banter, eventually they fell into a familiar and intimate silence as Winry finished up measuring. Finally, she had checked and double checked every measurement meticulously, then cleared him to move again as she went to look in storage.

She re-entered from an off-shoot room with her clipboard of measurements and notes, spare leg in arm. "Hm, so good news is we do have a wooden spare at your size, bad news is your actual new leg will take three to four days to assemble and I'm backlogged on work so it'll be delayed behind my current orders. Meaning it could be a week or more.”

Ed’s face subconsciously dropped, pouting slightly.

Winry continued, shrugging with a sympathetic expression. “You'll have to make do with the spare, even if it's kinda stiff and doesn't move independently. I know you've never been a fan of them. It's better than lumbering around on your short old automail though, that's bad for the hips and knees. At least this is your size. You only have one knee left to care for, so unfortunately I'm gonna need you to sit back down so I can get the spare on you, sorry."

Ed conceded, not daring to argue with her logic as he flopped back into the chair despite being restless. "Alright, alright." He propped his leg up to have his automail swapped for the spare model, once again settling in for an at least twenty minute session of sitting there idly as she swapped it out.

One leg change later, Ed was wobbling around uncomfortably on the spare from the moment he stood. He'd have to adjust, as always. "Man, feels weird." He complained under his breath, before pausing and sucking in his discomfort with the leg to show gratitude. "Thank you though. I'll make it work."

Winry blinked, smiling at him as she seemed to have a funny thought that she chose not to share. "You really have matured, huh.” Ed stuck his tongue out at her like they were kids just to be contrary, and she rolled her eyes with a snicker.

"Ah yes, so wise." She prodded, shaking her head. He flashed his trademark devious grin.

"That's where you're wrong, I have low wisdom and high intelligence, I'm a dumbass genius. A foolish intellectual if you will. But sure, I guess my personality has matured some. In other ways, never."

Winry rolled her eyes again but couldn't hide her own smile. "What am I going to do with you? You're lucky so you're so damn cute." She thought out loud with an exasperated laugh.

Ed simply continued to smile at her, softer now. He kept finding his mind so often wandering, thinking and meditating on his relationship with her. It was as if his mind could finally slow down enough to fully grasp what had always been right in front of him, and it came in recurring waves of nostalgia and euphoria.

He was happy here with her in a way that felt familiar, yet new. Time would pass as it does while he settled into his new life shared with her, progressing slowly when moving forward and too quickly when looking back.

Things would change drastically in their dynamic over time as they grew, figured out what they wanted, developed their communication, and built a fresh romantic foundation to transform their lifelong bond. This was a beautiful start to a wonderful life ahead, and Ed couldn't be more grateful for every moment shared with her.

He looked to their future with hope, his heart lightened of many burdens he had once bore tirelessly. All of his psychological injuries had finally started to become closed scars, rather than gaping wounds.

No more empty roads and lonely train cars for Ed. They won, they survived the Promised Day, the world was preserved, and now they can finally consider their future in earnest.

One thing he knew for certain; no matter where Winry may go, he would remain by her side. Always.