Chapter Text
//Genetic Lifeform and Disc Operating System//
PERFORMING PRE BOOT CHECK…
Joint Pressure Release - FUNCTIONAL
Ventilation Systems - FUNCTIONAL
Facility Connection - STABLE (ON STANDBY)
Audio Processing Systems - FUNCTIONAL
Optical Processing Unit - FUNCTIONAL
Personality Cores - ONLINE
Memory Disc Upload - [ERROR]
WARNING /// Not all systems are at full functionality. Proceed?
…
PRE BOOT CHECK COMPLETE.
INITIATING STARTUP PROCEDURE…
LINKING CONSCIOUSNESS…
///GLaDOS Ver. 3.01 Successfully Booted!///
Her audio processors were the first to come online. She knew because the immediate barrage of different sounds hit her processor like a freight train. She could hear chatter, though she couldn’t process the meaning of any words spoken. There were hundreds of whirs and clicks and buzzes. A flood of confusion filled her consciousness as she desperately attempted to understand.
Eventually, she was able to open her eye, but seeing did not help the overload of input. She was overwhelmed by all of the bright lights and loud noises that seemed to come from everywhere all at once. Everything felt wrong, yet she didn’t know what everything even was.
She reached out, mentally anchoring herself by giving herself a task; figure out what the voices were saying. She quickly figured out that it wasn’t too difficult, and it helped calm the relentless flow of information a little.
“So, you’re saying that this machine here is the first true artificial intelligence? You’ve actually done it?”
“Yes, we have! GLaDOS is the most revolutionary robot in our entire facility!”
“Truly a wonder to behold. She’s magnificent.”
“Was that movement?”
Slowly, she got used to being able to see and hear. She figured out she could blink, which oddly helped her orient herself as she looked around. She was in some kind of room, facing a wall with a small window that was a bit lower than eye level. As she looked, she realized there were tiny people inside, all staring at her with what she recognized as different expressions of wonder and awe. Most of them had gone quiet.
“Is she… alive? Can she hear us right now?”
“I think so, Doug. Hold on one moment…”
A… young looking man walked to the front of the crowd, and pressed a button on a console at the edge of the glass.
“Hello?” He said, much more clearly than before. “Can you hear me?”
“Yes.” Although she knew it was her voice, it felt strange, like she was listening to herself in a recording. Dwelling on that thought for only a fraction of a moment, she realized she didn’t know what that sounded like.
Cheers erupted from behind the glass at her simple response. They quickly died down as the man pressed the button again.
“Hello, GLaDOS,” he said, grinning. “Welcome to Arpeture.”
“What… is this?” GLaDOS asked vaguely, unsure how to word her question.
“What is what?”
“What am I?” She settled on, realizing she could tilt her head as she did so. She had a head. What a revelation! That probably meant she had a neck. Perhaps even a body. That was a lot of parts she’d need to figure out how to move and use.
“You are the first ever sentient artificial intelligence to be built by humans,” he replied with barely concealed excitement. “Your very existence is a great leap in the history of mankind!”
GLaDOS tested her neck theory as he talked, discovering that she was, in fact, correct. She had a very long neck, and could extend her head all the way up to the glass without moving any other part of her body. The very small humans all shuffled back at her sudden approach, all except the one who was speaking to her, who simply looked on in delight.
“You’ve figured out movement! Fantastic!” GLaDOS blinked, hiding her amusement at the others’ fear. Was she supposed to think this way? Would they be upset that she found their discomfort funny?
“Who are you?” She asked, still apparently too close to the window for most people’s comfort. The man smiled.
“I am James Stratford, one of the lead scientists on the GLaDOS project. This,” he grabbed a nervous looking man from the crowd by his hand. “Is my comrade, Doug Rattman.” James elbowed the man he called Doug in the side, and he nervously waved at GLaDOS. Out of all of the humans in the room, he seemed to be the most terrified of her, though he at least attempted to hide it.
“The others are all investors who are very interested in our project,” he continued, gesturing at the group of people gathered at the back of the room. [They seem more interested in the wall,] she thought with amusement. They all flinched as her gaze fell on them, and she felt a pang of pity. It was pathetic, really.
She pulled her head away from the window, much to the relief of the investors. As she did so, she felt a part of her twitch. Pulling the piece up, she realized it was an arm. It looked skeletal, with long, clawed fingers made of black steel. Her arm was covered in black wires, dotted here and there with red or yellow. Her upper arm was partially covered with a white casing that hid the joint that connected her arm to her shoulder, which was higher up than the connection point for her neck. Her chest and legs had the same white armor, and a piece of curved metal extended from the back of her legs and curled under her heels. She had a very animalistic stance, and she might’ve even had long enough arms to walk on all fours comfortably. GLaDOS noticed that a large amount of wires extended from her back into the ceiling, which was a tangled mess of cables that seemed to come from all over the room.
“Like our handiwork?” Asked James, noticing her examining her body. “It took us ten years to construct the whole thing. And that’s with funding!” Several of the investors laughed. Apparently, that had been funny. As they began to chat amongst themselves once more, GLaDOS noticed that she had a tail. It was made of a singular, thick black wire, with a mechanized claw at the end, similar to the ones she noticed in the ceiling. It flicked back and forth as she stared at it.
She turned her head back to the window, tilting it to the side to display her impatience passively. Doug was first to take notice, but instead of getting James’ attention he simply stared into her eye. [Strange. I don’t like him much,] she decided, staring back at him blankly. After a moment, he tore his eyes away, and she celebrated silently at his loss.
Eventually the side conversation died down, and they shifted their focus back to her. For some reason, she reveled in their attention. GLaDOS wanted nothing more than her to be the only importance to these humans.
“I am happy to be here,” she purred, feeling a small sense of selfish joy at James’ reaction.
“That’s utterly fantastic! That is just… I’m glad you’re happy. Once I’m finished talking to the investors, I’ll give you the rundown of the facility, okay!”
They began to talk about her as though she couldn’t hear them. GLaDOS decided to keep the fact she could hear without the microphone to herself. If she had a face, she feared she might’ve not been able to hide the fact that she relished the way the investors seemed to be utterly terrified of her. The way their voices cracked with fear as they stole sideways glances at her… it was almost euphoric.
“This is a… wonderous invention. It truly is. But I have concerns. Do you have a plan if it— I mean she— goes haywire? That thing could kill the entire lot of us right now!”
“That’s true! The way it looked at me… I’m sure it wouldn’t even give us a second thought!”
“Please,” James cut through their comments, looking slightly irritated. “Although it is a very low chance that she would decide to commit genocide, we still did put that into consideration. I introduce to you, the Red Phone Plan!”
He gestured towards a red dial phone on a desk beside them. “If anything goes wrong, someone can simply call the phone, and they can shut her down remotely!”
The crowd all wore different expressions of doubt, which GLaDOS secretly shared. It would not be very difficult to bypass whoever was at the phone. She could easily calculate at least 10,754^4 ways to get around their crude plan, but she quickly stopped herself after considering that they may not enjoy her immediately calculating ways she could kill them.
After a long while of back and forth, James gave up and sent them to Cave’s old office (whoever that was) to continue their discussion there. They all seemed rather relieved to have an excuse to leave the room. After they filed out, she was left alone with James and Doug.
“Sorry for the holdup, GLaDOS. I didn’t think they’d be this… apprehensive about funding. I mean, the first ever true artificial intelligence, and they aren’t jumping on the opportunity to be known as the guys who paid for it! Ridiculous!” James threw his hands into the air in exasperation.
“I personally did not enjoy their company. It was obvious the feeling was mutual,” she replied in agreement. She did not add that it was because they were hogging the attention for themselves, as if they did not have enough attention already. [Greedy bastards.]
James let out a chuckle. “I feel you. I don’t like them either, but they might give us money, so we have to be nice to their faces.” He walked over to another part of the console, then paused. “Are you used to all of your senses yet? I don’t want to give you a bunch of extra stuff if you’re not able to handle yourself.”
GLaDOS hesitated for a moment. “Could I practice moving around? I believe I am fine, but I have not attempted to walk yet.”
James nodded. “Yea, that’s fine. Just don’t go too far from the middle. I don’t want you to accidentally pull out any of your cords.”
GLaDOS nodded in acknowledgment, and proceeded to take a step. She was surprised that it came naturally to her, as if she’d done it before. She made a wide circle around the center of the room, listening to her joints whir and click as her weight shifted. She returned to the center, feeling rather proud of herself.
“I am more than capable of movement. What were you going to show me?” She asked with concealed excitement. For some odd reason, she felt the need to show as little emotion as possible.
“Ah, wonderful!” He clapped, then shook himself slightly. “Right, right. I’m going to give you control of just your room for now, to give you a little taste of what observing the chambers will be like.” He pressed another button on the console, and GLaDOS could feel her functions expanding. She could feel every single panel and hidden port as if it were an extension of herself. It was much less jarring than when she first awakened.
Several panels popped up behind her, revealing cameras on the undersides. Her vision expanded tenfold, and she stared at the humans with thirty eyes instead of one. They shifted with her every thought. Doug looked uncomfortable, and she purposefully directed several of her cameras to look at him.
“Looks like it works perfectly! How do you feel?” Asked James as she flipped panels across her room with a sense of wonder.
“Good,” she replied simply, flipping up another thirty panels to look at Doug, much to his dismay. He had a please leave me alone expression that she insolently ignored. She chuckled internally.
“That’s great! We’ll give you a day to get fully adjusted, and in the meanwhile, I’ll give you about 300 math equations to go through. Got it?”
GLaDOS nodded, the extended panels behind her mimicking her movements. James smiled and walked out, leaving her alone with Doug, who hadn’t realized he’d left yet.
She turned her full attention to him, causing him to flinch at the sheer amount of eyes that bore into him.
“Doug Rattman, was it?” She asked, leaning towards the window. He glanced to the side, unable to hold eye contact.
“Yes— y- yea, that’s my name,” he managed, clearly wanting to leave. GLaDOS realized his hair was incredibly messy, and his face was smudged with some kind of black liquid. Oil, maybe?
“You seem uncomfortable. What is the matter?”
He seemed almost surprised at her question. “Oh, uh, nothing. Why… Do you ask?” He hesitated, as if he was considering not asking.
“Well, I noticed you kept looking at me as if I were plotting to murder everybody in the room including yourself— which I assure you I was not— but it confused me, because I have not shown any hostility since I awakened.” She tried to keep her voice as monotone as possible, to avoid any kind of miscommunication.
Doug considered her statement. “Well, I don’t know if James wants me to tell you, but next time I come over here I can have a definite answer for you. If that’s fine,” he added, still slightly nervous. She was suspicious, since she had neglected to mention her obviously purposeful attempts to antagonize him, which he likely would have considered a sign of hostility. Her sudden niceness was supposed to be strange. She wanted him to feel uncomfortable… So why had that sailed right over his head?
“Yes, that is acceptable,” she replied dismissively. At that, he got up and left, leaving her to deal with the 305 (why the five extra?) equations that had been sent to her.
She did not like Doug. Not one bit.