Chapter Text
Baking cookies with his mother on Saturday afternoons has been part of their routine for as long as he can remember. Blaine knows all the recipes in his mother’s handwritten book. He loves that thing, its edges are faded from overuse and the pages are crisp with neat writing. Although he need never look for a recipe in the actual book, its a part of their routine. And if its one things the Anderson’s live for, its routine.
Blaine’s mother, Anita, has a routine. She studied as a pastry chef and worked in a gourmet shop before giving birth to Blaine. Now, Anita spends the week days preparing lessons for her son, teaching him all the things a boy his age should know. Anita does her best to make it fun, homeschooling was not something she planned on doing when Blaine was born, but once she made the decision, everything else fell into place. The family moved to a very small town outside the city to avoid large masses of people, unfortunately that meant that a good school was just too far out of their reach. So Anita makes lesson plans and gets creative with her teaching methods. She teaches Blaine how to cook and how to knit and how to play the piano. She reads to him and when he is old enough, has him read to her. In the late afternoons they both work diligently to have a delicious dinner ready for when her husband, Robert arrives from work.
Robert also has a routine. In the mornings his wife wakes him with a loving kiss to the cheek, he makes his way to the bathroom and gets ready for the day. Once he’s showered and dressed, he goes down to the kitchen where Anita always has a hearty breakfast waiting for him. His son Blaine helps her set up, still in pajamas, hair unruly from sleep but his ever present smile is always there as a greeting for a new day. After breakfast Anita gives him a quick peck on the lips and brushes his shoulders for lint that is never there, Blaine gives him another smile and wishes him a good day at work before he hands him his briefcase and both he and Anita wave him off for another day at work. He works at a busy law firm in the city, being made partner shortly after Blaine’s fifth birthday makes it difficult for him to spend much more time with his family.
Even Blaine has a routine, it’s changed the most over the years, growing up comes with growing responsibilities. He wakes shortly after he hears his father start his shower, he greets his mother and helps her with breakfast, knowing she could use the help. Together they make short work of it and by the time his father is downstairs, freshly shaven and ready for work they all sit down to breakfast. They don’t speak much, choosing to share pleasant smiles with one another but not wanting to overwhelm their still sleep addled minds with conversation. After his dad is off to work his mother sends him to ready himself for the day while she does the dishes and prepares their learning room for the first lesson of the day. The rest of the morning and afternoons are spent with lesson after lesson. Then they either cook or learn a new song from the big book of classical pieces Blaine got for his eleventh birthday.
By the time Robert returns home, their dinner is ready and the three of them talk about their day before retiring to the sitting room. Most nights Anita will insist Blaine play a new song he learned for his father before sending him to bed, wanting him to get as much rest as a growing boy should have.
The weekends are for running errands. One weekend Anita will do the shopping; the next Robert will do it. Blaine doesn’t go to the store with them, not until he’s a bit older anyway. He hardly goes anywhere at all. Some weekends Robert takes him to a toy store, the older one at the edge of town where less people are likely to go, but that’s only on random days when the weather is less favorable and people rather stay home.
Robert does plan the odd day out every few weeks, choosing to drive the family to a forest reserve or somewhere equally as desolate. They pack a picnic and a ball for Robert to toss around with Blaine, or a book and a guitar to pass the time. Robert and Anita were happy to have such a well mannered son, but like any child he was riddled with questions. He wondered why he didn’t go to school with other children, he wondered why his parents never had friends over. As he grew older he asked why he wasn’t allowed to go out and play, or why he wasn’t allowed to be alone, ever. His questions were always answered with distractions or friendly dismissals. He was too young they told him, when you’re older, they told him. He always agreed, but Robert and Anita knew that soon enough their son’s unwavering cooperation would start to crumble.
The Anderson’s never go on vacation. Blaine lives on a street with no one his age, most of his neighbors are elderly or well on their way, Blaine Anderson does not have friends.
The only time he was able to play with anyone close to his age was when his Aunt Selina and Uncle Craig visited when he was five. They brought their grand daughters, eight year old twins, Joan and Sandy. Blaine was so excited to play with them, he shared all his toys and even went along with their idea to throw a princess themed dance party. He doesn’t ask why his mom insists that he wear gloves with his long sleeved shirt and pants, even though it was mid-June. He was too young at the time to understand why his father got so nervous and his Uncle Craig shook his head during their dance party. Blaine danced happily with his fellow princesses and spoke of all the adventures they would get into when they would get together again.
Only that was the first and last time he saw Joan and Sandy, and he only saw his Aunt Selina after that. She stopped coming around completely after a couple years. The first weekend Robert was gone, Anita explained to Blaine what a funeral was and that Aunt Selina had gone to live with angels. Blaine may have only been seven at the time, but he knew that if angels existed, his Aunt Selina was probably not with them. Angels were supposed to be good and well, even then Blaine understood that not all people are good.
And still, the Anderson’s stuck to their routine. They spent their days together, not sparing a thought to the outside world. Robert would wake up every morning and kiss his wife good night. Anita would cook for her husband and teach her son and Blaine, he did his very best to be a good boy for his parents.
—-
But as all things do, their routine changed one Saturday afternoon. Blaine’s fourteenth birthday was coming up the following week, and he’d notice a certain level of anxiety in his parents lately. He was asking more questions and finding their answers lacking. He was becoming moodier and less agreeable. He was having trouble sleeping, his mom or dad started sitting with in his room on nights that he was especially restless. That week had been another long one for Robert, he was putting in a lot of hours at the office and wouldn’t make it home until nearly ten in the evening. Anita and Blaine would wait up for him, reviewing a lesson or practicing on the piano. The law firm had taken on a big case which required a lot of his time. When Robert walked through the door he barely had enough energy to take off his shoes let alone stay awake. Which is why this particular Saturday, Anita decided to let Robert sleep in. She and Blaine made a lovely breakfast, they set aside a plate for Robert, and spent the morning doing some cleaning. By early afternoon Robert was still sleeping, it was Blaine’s idea to bake something. He thought the smell of homemade cookies baking in the oven would be the best way to wake his father.
They had all their ingredients out when Anita realized that they were all out of eggs and milk. It was Robert’s turn to do the grocery shopping but she didn’t want to bother him. She was ready to return the supplies back to their place when Blaine spoke up.
“I can go to the store.” His voice was nervous. Like a boy trying to sound confident but knowing without a doubt that he had no ground to land on.
Anita looked over from behind the cupboard door, “Oh, sweetheart! That’s not necessary, we’ll just bake something for dad tomorrow after he’s done the shopping.”, she assured.
Blaine didn’t look convinced, he was always small for his age, a little pudgy around the edges but there was no denying that he was growing into his own skin. His shoulders were getting broader and it was obvious he was due for a growth spurt soon. Even then despite his small build, he did his best to stand his ground, even if his nerves got the better of him.
“But, I mean. Mom, I’ve gone to the store with dad plenty of times! It’s not far at all, I could walk there or take my bike. I can go and come back, easy!”, his honey ambered eyes shone as he pleaded his case, he wanted this, Anita knew but there was just no way. It was too dangerous.
“Sweetie, I don’t think its a good idea. We’ll just wait for your father to wake up and-”
“I can do it, though! It’s not a big deal, mom. Please!”
“Blaine there is no need to raise your voice. Your father is asleep and we wouldn’t want to wake him. You know how tired he’s been. Besides, you’ve never gone on your own, it’s too-”
“That’s just it, though! I never go anywhere on my own! I never do anything on my own! I-”
Blaine’s shouts were cut off by an aggravated grumble, both he and Anita looked up to see and sleep rumpled Robert standing at the foot of the stairs.
“Hey, hey, hey! What is with all the shouting! Blaine, why are you yelling at your mother? You know better than that, son.” Robert asks his son directly, his limbs are heavy and he feels like he’s been sleeping for a month but he’s still so very tired.
He looks between his wife and son standing on opposite sides of the kitchen, Anita looks more nervous than she has in a long time and Robert is sure he’s never seen Blaine this worked up in his life.
“We need some groceries, darling. But we didn’t want to bother you while you slept. Blaine wanted to go to the store on his own but I told him you would agree that it doesn’t seem like a safe idea.” Anita replies, making sure to put emphasis on the fact that Blaine wanted to go out alone, without making it too obvious.
Robert nodded, understanding immediately, “Your mother is right, Blaine. I can go to the store after I get dressed. It’s no problem at all.”
That only serves to aggravate Blaine more, “But its not fair! I’m not stupid and I’m not a little kid. I don’t need to be with you two all the time! I can do stuff by myself!” he shouts before running up the stairs and to his room. Anita and Robert wince when they hear their son slam his bedroom door shut.
Both parents share a concerned look.
“Should we? What do we do, Robert? He’s been talking back more and more lately. The doctors said this would happen, I don’t think we can keep this a secret from him for much longer.”
“I know, love. I think it’s time we told him the truth. It’s only going to get worse from here on out. We can’t keep him locked away in this house forever.”
Robert holds out his arms, hugging his wife close when she begins to cry.
—-
They find Blaine curled up in his bed. He took off his shoes and has his legs tucked up, holding them close to his chest. He’s obviously been crying, there are still tear tracks on his cheeks. Robert knocks on the door lightly while pushing it open slowly.
He doesn’t respond, he buries his face into the pillow next to him, Blaine assumes he’ll be getting a lecture. He knows he shouldn’t have raised his voice. His parents have done their best to give him a happy life but he can’t help feeling like something is wrong. He wishes so deeply to have something different. Something more.
It makes him feel guilty. There is something his parents are hiding, Blaine knows that. He isn’t sure what it is or why they feel the need to keep him from the world but there must be a reason. His dad goes out and talks to people, he has a job and knows more people than Blaine has ever seen in his life. His mom does too. She might spend most of her time with him, but she goes out too. He can’t remember the last time he was truly alone. One of his parents has always been around. Even when he was younger and they would let him play outside. His mom or dad were there. Helping him learn to ride a bike or watching him as he ran after bubbles in the garden.
Blaine knows he shouldn’t have yelled. He feels the sting of gathering tears in his eyes.
He looks up when he feels the weight of two bodies sitting near the edge of his bed. His mom looks so worried. The worry lines are visible on her forehead. His dad sits near her, he places a hand on her shoulder and the other reaches out to pat Blaine’s leg.
He wants to apologize. He should. He shouldn’t have gotten so mad. But they are lying. Blaine knows they are keeping something from him. No matter how hard they try, this life isn’t normal. People don’t behave the way they do. Normal people go to school with kids their age. They have friends, they go to the mall and talk to people other than their parents.
If only they could stop lying. They must not trust him. That’s it. How could they not trust him? He’s been a good son, he completes his lessons and helps around the house all the time. Blaine knows he is a good son, a good person. What could be so awful that they need to lie? Are they hiding from someone? Could they be in danger, is someone out to get them?
He’s been so good, why can’t they trust him?
“Why?” He asks, suddenly feeling years worth of repressed confusion and anger. He sits up, trying to wipe away the fresh wave of tears.
“Why what, son?” Robert wonders. He can tell how closed off Blaine has become but the anger is rolling off of him in waves.
“Why don’t you trust me?!” Blaine jumps off the bed then, wanting to put distance between himself and the liars on his bed. He paces back and forth, his hands run impatiently through his hair. The hair gel he started using last year makes his finger feel sticky. Frustrated, he slams his hands against his desk.
“Honey, please. Please calm down. Of course we trust you, Blaine. We love you. We both love you so much.” Anita pleads with her son. Her voice is shaking as she tries to hold back the tears. Seeing her son unravel this way is the last thing she ever wanted.
“No you don’t! I don’t deserve to be lied to. I’ve always done what you told me. I don’t question it. I accept what you tell me but I know you’re keeping something from me!” Blaine cries as he wraps his arms around himself.
Anita rushes forward, she can’t stand there and watch her son try so hard to be understood. To feel validated. Blaine turns away but doesn’t pull back when he feels his mother wrap her arms around him.
“We just want to protect you, nothing more. All we do is for your safety.” Robert pleads, he knows this is it. There is no way he could live with himself while knowing that Blaine is in such agony.
Blaine looks up from where he’s nestled in his mother’s arms.
“Protect me from what? What could be so terrible that I need to be locked away like a prisoner?” Blaine looks at his dad, begging for the answers he so longs for.
“Just tell me, dad. What could be so dangerous. Just tell me, you know I can handle it.”
He stares between his mom and dad. They are sharing a look of complete resignation maybe even fear.
“You’re right, son. You are absolutely right. It’s time you knew the truth.”
—-
Blaine sits across from his mom in the living room. Anita took Blaine’s hand and led him downstairs while Robert disappeared into their bedroom. A few moments later he walks into the living room holding a wooden lock box. He takes a seat next to Blaine on the couch and sets the box down onto the coffee table. Blaine looks at the box, confusion setting in.
“Wha-”
Anita shakes her head. “Just hear us out first son, then we’ll answer any questions you have.”
Blaine looks between his parents again before nodding in agreement. He’s waited so long for this, he can wait a bit more.
“What I need to stress, Blaine, is that your mother and I have tried to make a happy life for you. All we’ve ever wanted to do was take care of you. To keep you away from anyone that might want to hurt you or take you away from us. We love you, son.” Robert starts.
Blaine nods..
“When you were born there were some… irregularities.” Robert stops when he feels Blaine tense up.
“-nothing life threatening! We’ve told you that the reason you had to stay in the hospital for a few weeks after you were born was because you were born prematurely. The truth is that the when you were born, you were very ill. When the doctor and the nurses first touched you, you had a serious reaction to it. Your skin became irritated, and your heart rate was alarmingly high.”
Anita reaches over to squeeze Blaine’s hand, noticing his increasing worry. She smiles at him, trying to reassure him that everything is alright.
“But I’m not sick now, am I?” Blaine wonders out loud before he can stop himself.
Robert continues talking, not answering Blaine question. “The doctors were stumped for days, you see, whenever anyone but your mother and I touched you, you would have another episode. Your heart rate would skyrocket and you would have trouble breathing. We had every doctor and surgeon in the hospital trying to figure out what was the matter. The only way anyone could get you to stabilize is by continued skin to skin contact. Your mother and I were the only ones that it worked with though, anyone else would only further your symptoms. It wasn’t until a specialist came to see us after you’d been in the incubator for nearly two weeks that we finally caught a break.”
Anita reaches for a tissue, remembering those awful first weeks of her son’s life still resonate deeply with her. She and Robert never knew fear until then.
“The specialist, Doctor Porter, told us about a rare condition she believed were suffering from. It doesn’t really have a name, not even now. But it manifests differently in each patient. It develops and changes over time. All your symptoms matched up. The doctor ran some tests and confirmed that her suspicions were correct.”
"So then, I am sick? I don’t understand."
"Its difficult to explain. Physical interaction with anyone besides your father and I causes something similar to an allergic reaction. But as the years passed your reactions changed. "
Robert nods along with his wife, choosing to continue talking when Anita begins to cry again.
“We stayed in the hospital for a few days after that. No one but us touched or held you, the nurses helped your mother but she and I did everything required. When it was just the three of us alone in the room, you were absolutely fine. You were sleeping well through the night and eating regularly. You were just like any of the other babies in the hospital. It was clear that your condition was only triggered when someone touched your skin. Doctor Porter tested it, when you were fully clothed and wrapped in a blanket, she and the nurses were able to hold safely you as long as your skin was completely covered.”
“We took you home after that. You know that your father and I moved to Ohio from Pennsylvania after he was offered the job at the firm. We didn’t have any family and very few friends in Columbus when you were born. We had a small house that we weren’t very attached to. Those first months were filled with making plans and learning all we could about your condition. I decided it was best to quit my job at the bakery to care for you full time.”
Blaine was shocked. He never knew about his birth or the complications. But his parents explanations still didn’t explain why they’ve lived in such seclusion.
“I feel fine though. I’ve never had any kind of reaction, not that I can remember.” He feels like the answers are right in front of him but he still can’t see them clearly.
“Well, its like your mother said, son. We’ve spent so much time, years now, learning all we could know about your condition. What we know is that it is very rare, doctors only know of a dozen other confirmed cases like yours in the last twenty years. ”
“Mom, Dad. Just tell me. I know you’re still keeping something from me. Please just tell me what scares you so much about me.”, Blaine says in a soft voice. All this talking has only served to confuse and scare him more. He just wants to know, he’s shaking.
Robert and Anita share another one of their looks, it’s Anita who finally speaks.
“Blaine, your condition, it manifests differently as you grow. When you were a baby all we needed to do was hold you, your breathing would even out and you would be back to normal in a matter of seconds. All the doctors said that it would change, that you would grow more frustrated. When you were a toddler we wanted you to have friends but it was clear you wouldn’t be able to be around many people. The few times you were around others when you were little caused you such distress. But you’re right, we were scared. We are scared. The doctors said that once you reached puberty, your condition would change all together and your father and I would no longer be able to help you.”, Anita stops, reaching over for a tissue to wipe her nose.
Blaine looks over at his father willing him to continue.
“We started noticing the signs a couple months ago. Your moods started changing, you started sleeping less and more fitfully. Any other parents could write it off as you going through growing pains, but we knew better. Blaine once you enter puberty, if you come into physical- skin to skin contact with certain people, your body will start having certain urges that-”
Blaine flushes, he and his dad had this talk a few months ago. He knows about that stuff. Well as much as his dad was willing to tell him anyway. But he can guess what goes on. He is thirteen not three, after all.
“No son, this is different. If that were ever to happen, it’s tough to know who those people could be but if by chance you and another person touch, you’ll experience desire. Sexual desire so intense that it could be unbearable.” Robert coughs, looking away from his son’s stunned eyes. He knew this conversation was meant to happen sooner or later. He only wishes it weren’t so awkward.
Anita takes pity on her husband, moving to sit next to her son on the couch. “ If that were to happen, Blaine, you’re condition would make it so that you were insatiable, unable to think clearly for hours unless… Well, unless the person you contacted gives you release.” she says finally, noticing that Blaine has gone absolutely still.
Blaine looks between his parents, waiting for them to tell him that this is all some kind of sick joke. Maybe they are running from a murderer or perhaps they are secret spies like the ones the old movies. Any of those things would be more believable that what he’s just heard. He doesn’t even think about that kind of stuff. Well not really, sometimes at night his mind wanders but he’s still young. This can’t be right.
His attention is brought back when his father reaches for the box on the coffee table, Blaine had completely forgotten about it, his confusion only allowed for a certain amount of curiosity.
“Doctor Porter sent us this when we told her about your new symptoms, we both kept in contact with her after all these years and she’s consulted us on several occasions. Blaine, we never wanted to stop you from living the life you wanted, I guess we let our own fears hold you back.”
Anita smiles at her husband, “We moved here after your first birthday, Blaine. We wanted you to be able to live in your own home comfortably, without fearing that someone would get too close. I guess, we lost sight of things.”
Robert hands the box over to Blaine, placing it in his lap, signaling for him to open it.
Blaine opens the latch before lifting the lid. Inside he finds neatly organized pamphlets and a couple books. There are also a pair of sunglasses and two pairs of soft looking gloves. They are both a nude color that resemble the shade of his skin. He reaches down to run a finger over them, there are soft grooves on the palms, the rest of them are made from a smooth, cool to the touch material.
“We want you to be safe, there is a bunch of information for you to inform yourself about your condition, you can read them at your own pace, whenever you wish.” Anita supplies, knowing her son well enough to sense his confusion.
“And the glasses and gloves? What ar-” Blaine begins to ask but stops when his father stands up. His hands are crossed and he looks torn between emotions.
“We aren’t going to stop you from being your own person, son. When you were younger it was easier to keep an eye on you. You were so little, you still are. But you’re growing up. A boy your age needs his own space, his own time and to know that above all, we trust you, Blaine. All we ask is that you be cautious.” Robert says before stopping in front of his son, looking the boy in the eyes.
“You mean I can go outside, on my own?” Blaine dares to ask, trying desperately to keep his hopes in line.
Anita takes his hand and nods, smiling at him through her tears.
“You will be allowed to have some time on your own, yes. But you are still thirteen, barely a teenager, Blaine. You will ask for permission and will only be allowed to be away from your mother or I on certain occasions.”
Blaine jumps up, launching himself into his father’s arms. He can hardly believe it. Everything is still so messed up and he has so many questions. He doesn’t understand most of what his parents have told him but all he knows is that things are changing. He feels the changes coming but now he knows the truth.