cheeseplants
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“I can’t take it anymore. I can’t -”
“Soon,” Henry whispers, and Hans trembles. Bastard. Whoreson. God he loves him.
The sound cuts through the room like a thunderbolt. Hans's head jumps up, a restless panic rising, as three knocks echo through the room. His eyes widen suddenly, aware that they are naked, easily found in this room where anybody could walk in.
“Leave it,” Hans stares up at Henry, his senses reforming, the room coming back into shape.
“Now, now, what if it is important?”
“You can't be serious? What if they see me?” Hans says.
---
Hans is tied to a bed; that doesn't stop Henry from doing errands for the local villagers.
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"My prick is desperate, it's been weeks."
Henry choked, a half-laugh, half groan that went straight to Hans's prick.
"This is not going to become part of my duties," Henry said.
"Two friends can help each other out, can't they?"
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What if they kept each other warm at the poaching camp near Trosky?
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Everything and Nothing by cheeseplants
Fandoms: Good Omens (TV), Good Omens - Neil Gaiman & Terry Pratchett
28 May 2026
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Summary
“You know I only wanted to be left alone.”
“You did?” Aziraphale said.
“Of course. Have you ever been everything?
“All of matter, all of space.”
“Every birth.”
“Every death.”
“Every time someone’s cup of tea goes cold.”
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Or the one where God contains multitudes.
Series
- Part 2 of S3 fix-its
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Let Me Tempt You by cheeseplants for The 23rd Crow (DoYouRememberAlexander)
Fandoms: Good Omens (TV), Good Omens - Neil Gaiman & Terry Pratchett
26 May 2026
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Aziraphale raised the shell and opened his mouth to swallow it whole. It hit the bottom of his lip, and it tasted of salt and crashing waves. Crowley daring him to jump in, ever the tempter, as the cold sea lapped against his chest for the first time. Curling up in the pitch-black cabins of the Ark, hearing the roar of water smashing along the sides, and a hundred animals braying night after night. A hand, long and slender on his shoulder, a calm that rode with him to the first rainbow, to a world renewed.
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Oysters are known aphrodisiacs after all.
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Empty Pages by cheeseplants
Fandoms: Good Omens (TV), Good Omens - Neil Gaiman & Terry Pratchett
14 May 2026
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“Why am I an assistant bookseller?” Aziraphale peers over the desk where Crowley has been furiously scribbling. Crowley blinks, his fingers smudged with blue ink.
“Maybe Anthony finds your lack of authority charming.”
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What if they wrote their own stories?
Series
- Part 1 of S3 fix-its
Recent series
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S3 fix-its by cheeseplants
Fandom Good Omens (TV), Good Omens - Neil Gaiman & Terry Pratchett
28 May 2026
- Words:
- 3,141
- Works:
- 2
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Fall Ball Kink Thrall by Anthony Jes Crowley (jesmalestiel), cheeseplants
Fandom Good Omens (TV), Good Omens - Neil Gaiman & Terry Pratchett
05 Dec 2024
Summary
Unconnected stories written for for GOAD's 2024 Autumn Kink Event
- Words:
- 14,570
- Works:
- 5
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Sleeping with the frenemy by cheeseplants
Fandom Good Omens (TV), Good Omens - Neil Gaiman & Terry Pratchett
08 Nov 2024
Summary
What if Crowley and Azirapahle have been exploring their corporations together *wink wink* throughout their 6,000 friendship without ever really kissing or talking about feelings? That is the premise behind this series. Lots of mutual pining and sex. Hidden love. And two ineffable idiots who never say what they are truly thinking.
- Words:
- 16,985
- Works:
- 4
- Bookmarks:
- 21
Recent bookmarks
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Summary
It's the 1920s and Mildred, a war widow, has been working her pitch on Whickber Street Market for a little while now. She occasionally catches a glimpse of Mr Fell, the cheerful but distant bookshop owner across the road. However, when she begins to sell gramophone records, one in particular seems to catch Mr Fell's attention - soon, a quiet friendship develops.
- Language:
- English
- Words:
- 2,617
- Chapters:
- 1/1
- Collections:
- 2
- Comments:
- 26
- Kudos:
- 41
- Bookmarks:
- 5
- Hits:
- 171
Bookmarked by cheeseplants
13 Jun 2026
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the midwife and the goatherd by blackeyedblonde
Fandoms: Good Omens - Neil Gaiman & Terry Pratchett, Good Omens (TV)
16 Oct 2021
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Aziraphale is guiding his small herd of goats to the watering pool to drink when he spots a dark figure sitting a-ways down the rocky bank.
It’s not an unusual sight in these parts, a woman doing her washing or bathing by the water, though the flash of red hair immediately makes his heart leap into his throat. There is nobody else in this part of the world with hair like that—not yet. Not for many years to come.
He leaves his herd to laze in the paltry shade and carefully picks his way down the bank, using his staff to guide his already sure feet. When Aziraphale is halfway there the figure looks up, instantaneously vicious and wild-eyed, and then relaxes and merely stares upon the newfound relief of recognition. They both seem hyper-aware of the bundle in Crowley’s arms, but it’s not until the angel is standing a short meter away that he sees the tiny baby nursing at her exposed chest.
“My word,” he says, for lack of anything else, and because it comes out in a rush he can’t quite stop. “Where on earth did you find that?”
Series
- Part 3 of Dove Verse
- Language:
- English
- Words:
- 13,588
- Chapters:
- 2/2
- Collections:
- 1
- Comments:
- 99
- Kudos:
- 658
- Bookmarks:
- 100
- Hits:
- 7,492
Bookmarked by cheeseplants
12 Jun 2026
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Summary
One minute and twenty-three seconds before the whole mess began, Aziraphale received a message.
"Heaven and Earth are currently experiencing connectivity issues.
Miracles may be temporarily unable to function.
We appreciate your patience while we work to resolve this matter."
Aziraphale instantly got a headache.- Language:
- English
- Words:
- 17,044
- Chapters:
- 6/6
- Collections:
- 6
- Comments:
- 231
- Kudos:
- 715
- Bookmarks:
- 145
- Hits:
- 5,927
Bookmarked by cheeseplants
12 Jun 2026
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Experiments of an angel who has read entirely too much fanfic by azzfell, fellshish
Fandoms: Good Omens (TV), Good Omens - Neil Gaiman & Terry Pratchett
04 May 2024
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Summary
From the confidential journals of A.Z. Fell
Volume 968-69When one stumbles upon ‘fan fiction’ of his life, what is one supposed to do? Not read it? Not try out a few of those tricks on his demon? That would be silly.
Series
- Part 2 of Aziraphale's Diaries
Bookmarked by cheeseplants
12 Jun 2026
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Summary
The blanket falls down around Hans' hips as he sits up over Henry, grinning. "A full day is twenty-four hours, Hal. This—" he waves the note around, "—says any time until this time tomorrow."
"I hate it when you get pedantic," Henry groans.
Henry gets used for a day. Hans gets his favorite stress release in the form of one master blacksmith.
Bookmarked by cheeseplants
12 Jun 2026