Chapter Text
What awakened Taehyung from his precious sleep was this loud, repetitive noise originating from what seemed to be not his dream. Or was it?
“...what?” he dragged out half-groaning against his pillow. No one could have possibly heard his question from outside his empty studio apartment and the banging on his door continued.
He opened his left eye. Did he do a plastic surgery last night, 'cos that lid felt really damn heavy at the moment. He tried to focus on the clock on his nightstand.10:23. Ten minus six... five plus five was ten so... four? Four hours of sleep was an unacceptable amount and his face took a pained expression.
Monday was his second day off after Sunday and he had spent last night drinking his ass with his friends at some brand new, underground club Jungkook had recommended. At least that was what he remembered agreeing to.
The banging started again and this time Tae couldn’t make out if it was the one on his door or the one inside his head. His mouth tasted like an ashtray and his ears were buzzing. Flashbacks of the night before flooded his mind as he reluctantly sat up at the edge of his bed, leaning forward with his elbows on his knees to keep his head from spinning. He remembered the bitter body shots, Jungkook making out with this blonde against a wall, himself dancing with some girl, her nails digging in his shoulders, another friend of Jungkook’s was there and then he simply wasn’t. Everything was blurry.
He tried to calm his growing headache by massaging his temples, but there was banging again and this time a muffled voice had joined the attempt to grab his attention.
Taehyung wore his slippers and, with barely open eyes, dragged himself to the door, where he looked through the peephole to find a very chubby and impatient woman waiting for him. Fuck. He hastily took a step back clumsily bumping into his coat stand with a loud thump.
“Taehyung, I know you’re in there! I heard you!” she yelled from the other side of the door, and he didn’t have much time to think, “Yeah, Ms. Elise, I just woke up! I’m coming!” he faked an almost too cheerful response that made him cringe. Dammit.
Without going to the bathroom he tried taming his bed hair, with little success. He also, kinda, noticed he was wearing only a loose t-shirt and a pair of boxer shorts, and he rolled his eyes to himself. It would have to do for now. He unlocked the door and put his best good-boy smile.
“Good morning, Ms. Elise!” his throat hurt at the high pitch and he coughed. His landlady eyed him suspiciously.
“I’m here for the rent, Taehyung,” she stated coldly and crossed her arms. Right to the point.
“Yeah, about that…” he let his gaze fall.
“What’s so interesting about the floor, Tae?”
Tae looked up ready to make up some excuse, his mind running in as many miles as it could in the condition he was in and that wasn't many miles, mind you. “I-”.
“Nah ah ah,” she shook her finger cutting him off, “one week, okay? One! Only because I believe you’re a good kid.”
Good. Kid. He was none, but if that meant he was getting some extra pity with his rent by acting like a poor angel, he'd gladly continue with the act. Taehyung lightly bowed to the woman, defeat dressing his tone, “yes, Ms. Elise.”
He would have to do something about that otherwise he’d be sleeping on the streets very soon.
Tuesdays he was working ten to six in the afternoon at this fitness studio a few blocks from his apartment. It wasn’t paying much, but it was enough to support himself and his partying. Well, it used to be. Until recently when they decided to reduce his salary and move his payment day to the beginning of the next month instead of the ending of this one. Things were getting a little tough here.
Someone put a bunch of flyers by the gym’s entrance and Tae stood up nonchalantly to check them out and eventually throw them away. No free promo. He took one and returned to his desk, reading through it absently, not really paying attention to its details.
“‘Actors needed’, huh?” He bitterly scoffed at the title as he felt it mocking him through the cheap paper. Go waste your lives, cheap-ass actors. My time is over. I'm free. He took a deep breath. Maybe it was a sign. A sign he should go back to staring in short commercials or even, maybe, return to acting school and finish it. Ah, the jokes write themselves. He didn’t want to think about that. He clenched his teeth at the sudden feeling of grief that made his stomach turn and twist because of that era in his life, burning like acid at the back of his throat as he swallowed dryly, and memories flooded his senses, sending shivers up his spine.
The phone rang, momentarily putting everything to a pause, and he abruptly stuffed the flyer in his bag, picking up the handset to answer the call.
The moment he walked through the door, he plopped down on his couch, drained and done and cursing everyone and their dog. It had been a shitty day; everyone was so rude and wouldn’t listen to him no matter how hard he tried explaining everything they were asking about and he came close to breaking someone’s head one too many times. He reached to take his phone out from his bag and the flyer from the gym came up as well. Actors needed. He stared at it for a moment and this time he continued reading through it.
It was a rom/com indie drama kind of movie and they wouldn’t give more details on it, they didn’t even ask for a specific gender. Nothing. Just that the auditions closed the next day. Is this a fake audition to harvest your organs or something? He thought about it. At least the hotel housing this joke was a decent one. Auditioning (or die trying) was a completely stupid idea. He hadn't been in front of a camera for over a year and he hadn’t sent any resumes, photos, videos, or literally anything. An appointment was missing as well and he quickly decided against it. Instead, he dragged himself to the kitchen to make himself some pasta and feed his growling stomach.
He was dreaming, he knew it because he felt the dream drift away, leaving back no traces other than the dissatisfaction of getting robbed of its ending, and all of that because of his alarm. He got up, following his routine, but as he was about to leave, his eyes fell on the creased flyer deserted on the table and he stopped in his tracks. Without a second thought, he reached and tucked it in his bag, exiting his apartment. It wasn't like he wanted to do anything with it. They had hired a great flyer designer and his eyes really enjoyed looking at it, that's all. Could be useful in case he wanted a paper to stick his used bubblegum into before throwing it away.
At work, he found himself staring at the piece of paper more intensely as time went by, to the point where he ended up fidgeting with its corners while rereading the contact info every few minutes.
17:47. The address on the flyer wasn’t far from here.
17:50. Only ten more minutes and then what? What would he do then? Just appear and demand to be heard?
17:54. He started packing his stuff, a knot forming in his stomach.
18:00.
18:01.
18:02.
He didn’t move, just stared at the clock hanging on the wall across from his desk. He took himself by surprise when his legs started moving, taking him outside. The sun had almost set, the temperature already dropping, and he walked fast towards the address. He had nothing to lose, right? Just a stupid rom/com. They might not even choose him. Yeah, that was more than likely to happen. They would probably tell him he needed an appointment or even if they let him in they would see he wasn’t drama material, and he would go away having one more reason to abandon acting forever. Hell, he had only starred in commercials about snacks and one fore a pet shop.
He was getting closer and he turned around the corner, a car honked loudly as it almost ran him over, and he sharply jumped back on the sidewalk. If he wanted to make it to the auditions, he needed to keep his ass alive and have his eyes on the road. He continued more cautiously until he spotted the building he was looking for. Its entrance was open and he simply walked in, the building manager sitting behind his desk at the lobby, clicking fiercely at his mouse. Tae looked around but there were no indications as to where the auditions were being held.
“Excuse me, I’m looking for… this!” He took the flyer out from his pocket and brought it in front of the bored man’s face.
“5th floor, room…” his voice trailed off as his eyes darted to a paper in front of him and with the help of his fingers he searched for something, “513.”
“Thank you,” he nodded, going straight for the elevator.
The doors opened and he was met with his reflection staring back at him. He was pale and his hair was dry. Man, don't you look worn out... The ride up was short, but he got the chance to make himself more presentable. They wouldn't,,, judge him for his appearance, right? There was no dress code on the flyer! When the doors opened, his heart jumped at the characteristic sound of the elevator. Why was he so anxious all of a sudden?
The room was just a few feet to his right, but when he reached to knock, the door automatically opened by a person walking backwards, while bowing and laughing with someone inside, collapsed with his back to his chest.
The black-haired man quickly jumped forward, turning around to apologize. “Oh, man, I’m sorry,” but Tae was fast to laugh it off. He could actually get a tip or two from the guy, so he put his charming smile on.
“This is where the auditions for that indie film are held, right?”
The man’s cheeks were a little rosy in comparison to his pale skin, maybe because he was still embarrassed about falling on him earlier, and he just nodded and hummed approvingly.
“So…” Tae acted a bit more nervous than he was, the man didn’t need to know he had decided to just pass by, “Got any tips?”
The man scratched the back of his head and smiled a gummy smile while avoiding his eyes. What a dork. He must have been younger than him. “Nah, just- they’re looking for someone who will put a piece of themselves in their character if that makes any sense. They’ll ask you to tell a story, so… If they like your story, you’re doing well? I guess?” He chuckled.
Tae held the doorknob, “Well, thank you. I assume we’re going for the same role, so… good luck!”
“Yeah… thanks… you too!”
There was something off about his response, but Taehyung didn’t let it linger and just entered the room and closed the door behind him, politely greeting a man behind a desk.
“WHAT? YOONGI, CONGRATULATIONS, MAN!” Hoseok practically threw himself on Yoongi rocking him from side to side and kissing his cheeks sloppily. People were giving them amused looks from around the park.
Yoongi laughed, “Hobi, stop it! It’s only a minor role,” he said trying to push his best friend off of him.
“Minor?” You got the lead part, Yoongi, what are you talking about? They loved you!” He pressed another kiss to his friend’s temple and finally let him go. “Have you heard many actors getting roles in their first audition?” He smirked.
Yoongi could only smile at that. When they had told him they wanted him, at first he thought they were joking or trying to stir some kind of reaction out of him, but then they talked to him about the script and-
“Well, are you gonna tell me about the script? Is it a secret? Can you tell me either way? Come on, hyung, please!”
“Will you stop? I was just going to tell you. It’s actually very interesting. The guy that wrote it, Kim Namjoon, is actually at your age and he’s quite bright, I can tell. The story is about the relationship between two men, a painter and a drug addict-”
“Oh, so it’s a gay rom/com? I’m going to cry already.”
“Let me finish, Satan. Okay, so the painter doesn’t know about the other’s addiction and at first everything runs smoothly and it’s them against the world, but then shit happens, the addiction surfaces, money runs low, the painter doesn’t sell, and it basically shows all the difficulties they have to go through and the state of their relationship and how that changes. He told me he had already thought of the ending, but he didn’t want to tell me just yet. I think it’ll be heartbreaking.”
“Yoongi, I have a serious question,” Hoseok gradually stopped walking, “will you be playing the drug addict?”
He hesitated. He knew what was coming. “…yes?”
His best friend couldn’t contain his laughter, “I knew it!”
As days passed, Tae lost his original excitement about the film. They had let him audition after all, simply asking him to tell a story, exactly how that guy had described it. He had chosen a sad story about childhood that could show any possible talent he had regarding drama. In the end, they had asked him if the story was real. It wasn’t, but the feelings he had used to fuel it were. They had seemed to like him and had even asked for his contact info, but they hadn’t had the time to let him in on any more details at the moment, as the next appointment was shortly after him. For a while he was optimistic, but then he soon forgot. He had real problems clouding his thoughts.
It was Saturday evening and he had just returned from work, undressing on his way to the bathroom and tossing his clothes in a path behind him. He would take a bath, sleep for a couple of hours and then go out. His phone rang. Jungkook, just let me breathe for a moment, buddy. I’ll call you later, he promised as he turned the water to warm and moved under the shower head.
He washed thoroughly, letting the water drag the exhaustion from his muscles and down the drain. Without guidance, his thoughts drifted to this amazing girl today. She was doing a CrossFit workout, so damn intensely. She was so focused and in the mood. She wasn’t thin, her body strong and her shoulders just as wide as her hips. Perfect proportions. He felt himself getting hard as he focused on the sweat running down her chin and in between her breasts. He really needed to get laid at some point.
Masturbating in the shower was the final step before a good evening’s power nap of three hours and he grabbed his phone to charge it by his bed. Looking through the notifications, he was getting ready to call Jungkook. But Jungkook hadn’t called. Instead, there was an unknown number and he pressed dial, hoping it wasn't one of Jungkook's girlfriends searching for him again after he gave them Taehyung's phone number instead of his own.
It rang only once before a guy answered, “Hello, what can I do for you?”
“Hi, I got a call from this number not so long ago-”
“Oh, yes! Wait a moment, please.”
The guy did a shitty job at muffling the microphone because Tae heard him speak loud and clear from the other end. “Sir, I think this is for you!”
Soon another guy was on the line, his voice weirdly recognizable. “Hello? Is this Kim Taehyung?”
“Yeah… that would be me,” Tae couldn’t pinpoint where he had heard that voice before. Wait. Is this-
“Hey, Taehyung, this is Kim Namjoon. You auditioned for a role a few days ago and I’m calling to ask if you’d be interested in a second audition, this time with a script and a proper appointment. Maybe… tomorrow evening at 17:30?”
Tae knew he didn’t have the money, but he kept buying shots for Jungkook and the two girls from his university. Jungkook said they were a “present” for receiving a callback.
“Really, Jungkook?” he had asked amused. They were pretty cute, he couldn’t deny that.
“Yeah, really! You know Minseo has had a crush on you for almost a year now.” And that he knew.
Today was Tae’s treat and he was the one to decide where they’d go, so Rabbit Hole it was. He wasn’t in the mood for trying new places, he wanted to be sure he would like the music. And at the moment, that was exactly what he was doing. One of his favorite songs started playing “Cypher pt.4”. Some would say it’s not club material, but they couldn’t be more wrong. It was grinding material.
As they were all jumping and dancing together as a group, Minseo turned around, pushing her back against Tae’s chest and Jiwoo mimicked her move, turning against Jungkook. The two girls were mouthing the lyrics and laughing with each other as they grinded their hips against them and Jungkook gave him the look, raising one eyebrow approvingly while placing his hands on the girl’s thighs, pulling her closer.
Minseo lifted her arms, hooking them behind Taehyung’s neck, and rested her head on his collarbone. He brought his hands around her small waist, letting the rhythm guide their bodies. Soon she turned sideways to look at him with glimmering eyes and he let the alcohol in his system take the lead. He leaned in and pushed his lips on hers. It was sloppy and desperate and exactly what his body craved. Tae manhandled her into facing him and ran his fingers through her hair, pulling her close as he devoured her mouth, all tongue and teeth and pure lust. She opened her legs to straddle his thigh as their bodies came impossibly close. Taehyung could feel the warmth from her core on his thigh and he grinded harder against hers, looking for friction.
Minseo pulled away breathlessly to stare into his eyes and he tried his best to focus on what she was saying, reading her lips.
“Take me home, Taehyung.”
It was a smart move to put an alarm before going to the Rabbit Hole last night. He hit the snooze button. He knew himself well enough to know he could fall asleep almost instantly if he chose to turn it off completely and today wasn’t the day for it. He turned on his side facing the emptiness beside him. He ran his fingers up and down the cold sheets, smoothing down the wrinkles and with them the evidence of last night’s events. There was a post-it note on his pillow, but he didn’t even spare it a look. He didn’t care what was written on it. He might as well have thrown it away just then.
She had left. The girl that liked him for almost a year hadn’t even stayed the night.
Fuck her. Literally.
He knocked on the same door he had almost a week ago and the same guy with light pink hair opened the door.
“Hi, come on in, come on in!”
He hadn’t looked that big while sitting behind that desk, but now, he could only stare at his shoulders. “Hi, I have an appointment-”
“Yeah, I know. Namjoon isn’t here yet,” he smiled and walked back to his desk.
“I came earlier either way. I just hope that’s not a problem.”
“Nah, you’re fine. He’ll be here soon. I’m Jin, by the way!”
Taehyung reached for his hand and was awarded a confident grip, “Taehyung.”
“There is coffee and water over there, help yourself, take whatever you please.”
He grabbed a water bottle from a table by the wall and sat down on the sofa. Maybe he shouldn’t have come that early. His nerves were playing tricks on him and his stomach was twisted. Soon, but not soon enough, he heard a knock on the door and his eyes automatically darted towards the direction of the sound. Jin opened it, grinning instantly at whoever was on the other side and Namjoon walked in, giving one cup of coffee to Jin, whispering something in his ear and placing a small kiss on his temple. Taehyung quickly looked away. This was clearly a slightly disgusting domestic scene and he felt as if he was interrupting with just his presence alone.
“Hey, Taehyung, I’m glad to see you again. Just give me a moment and I’ll call you in, soon,” he said. His voice was warm and soothed his nerves. He nodded with an understanding smile and took a swig from his water bottle. He could wait now.
There was another knock and Jin stood up to open the door once again. Taehyung didn’t turn, but the person’s voice grabbed his attention. He shifted on his seat to look.
Wait, what? The black-haired guy from last time walked in and Jin told him something Tae couldn’t hear, making the man laugh. Their eyes met when Jin walked back to his desk. He was wearing a simple black hoodie and a pair of ripped light-colored jeans that showed his pale skin underneath, and his cheeks were, again, a very bright red –maybe from the cold? He walked towards him and sat down on the other end of the couch.
“It’s you again!” Taehyung smiled.
“Yeah, I guess,” the man chuckled and faced the floor. He must have gotten a callback as well.
Namjoon almost burst out of the room, “Oh, you two know each other?”
“Well,” Taehyung began and looked at the other man, “Only a bit.”
“That’s great, come on in!”
Taehyung was confused, “Both of us?” He pointed between himself and the man.
“Yeah, both of you!” Namjoon smiled and disappeared back into the room.
They both stood up and followed him. There were two chairs right in the middle and they both sat down facing Namjoon.
“Taehyung, last time we didn’t have the time to talk about the script. So now that you’re here I’m going to make the long story short and see if you’re interested. The movie will be a love story about a drug addict and a painter, falling in love. Then life happens and everything goes to shit, and I just wanna show the states of their relationship through all the hardships. It’s going to get pretty dark, I assure you. What do you say?” Yoongi also nodded at his words, turning sideways to look at Tae.
“I’m definitely interested, although I will have to check the script, I guess. It actually sounds like book material, to be honest.”
Namjoon pushed his glasses higher up the bridge of his nose. “Yeah, the first draft I made of this story was meant to be a book until Jin, the man outside, helped me see its potential.”
There was a short silence that Taehyung broke. “So, will we audition for the role separately or with the script or-”
“No, no!” Namjoon chuckled, “you both got the lead parts! But only if you want it of course,” he added quickly.
Taehyung’s brain was fighting to understand what he just said, but he couldn’t translate his words into a meaning that was making any sense to him.
Namjoon noticed his puzzlement and pointed his hand at the dark-haired man, “Yoongi,” then at him, “Taehyung,” and repeated himself as if he was introducing them, “Taehyung, Yoongi.”
His hand stayed pointing at Yoongi, “Drug addict,” then slowly moved to his direction, “Meet your painter.” Namjoon smiled proudly and leaned back against his chair.