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Miles Edgeworth always found it odd how every single event, no matter how simple or mundane, could be turned into a right mess by, well, Phoenix Wright. Honestly, how could one man be at the center of so much trouble? He had already managed to make Edgeworth’s own court life a living Hell, but it extended beyond the courtroom. It was everywhere. It was at airports, parks, small mountain villages, studio sets, Edgeworth’s own home, and even the bank where Edgeworth was currently standing. Yes, Miles Edgeworth and Phoenix Wright were caught in a robbery.
Really, Edgeworth should’ve known. Really. He noticed a high number of men wearing beanies when he parked his car and really, who wears beanies? Bank robbers… And his boyfriend, but mostly bank robbers. Dear God, he was caught in a bank robbery.
He feels a hand snake into his own and he realizes that it must be Wright. “Stay calm,” he hears in his ear, but how was he supposed to stay calm? On top of being robbed, Phoenix was going to get them hatecrimed.
“Only you would tell me to stay calm during a robbery.” He glares at Wright, but he’s sure Wright can see that it’s a mask. Edgeworth isn’t scared. He’s terrified.
Instead of replying verbally, Phoenix just squeezes his hand. It’s truly the smartest thing to do in this situation, but it still annoys Edgeworth to the core. He bites back an “I hate you” though because, frankly, it wasn’t the time for that. He would never do that at a time where their lives were in actual danger. Also because it wasn’t true. While he was adamant about it not being love, Edgeworth wasn’t oblivious and he knew that he held some sort of feeling for Wright. That’s why he chose to enter a relationship with his courtroom counterpart after all. It was a mutual attraction. But surely it wasn’t love.
The sound of gunshots ring in his ear and suddenly Edgeworth is both a lot more and a lot less aware of his surroundings. A part of his brain rationalizes that not only are there guns in the room, but people may be getting shot. But the rest of his brain turns him into a shaking mess. Suddenly he’s nine years old again and inside an elevator. Yanni Yogi is panicking and his father is-- His father…
His father is dead and now he’s older than his father ever was… He’s outlived his father.
A stinging clarity fills his mind and he remembers where he is. A holdup. He can see blood to the left of him out of the corner of his eye. He notes not to turn his head that way and instead moves his head slightly to the right. When Edgeworth catches Phoenix’s eyes he also notes how worried Wright looks, before noticing the arm wrapped around his body. Wright most likely had to steady him during his small panic. How ghastly.
“I apolo--” Edgeworth begins, but Phoenix immediately shuts him up. Despite it being extremely rude, Edgeworth gives it a pass. This was a bank robbery after all. Speaking of, he’s sure that gunman is walking towards them, and good God, that gunman has his gun pointed at him. He has his gun pointed at Phoenix.
“Get on your knees!” The gunman yells and Edgeworth needn’t be told twice. He’s on his knees quicker than a speeding bullet… Not to be insensitive to the situation. What scares Edgeworth, however, is that Phoenix is not on his knees. No, Phoenix was still standing. Why was that imbecile standing? He tugs on Wright’s hand, but much to his dismay, Wright won’t budge.
“Phoen--” Edgeworth begins to plead, but he’s cut off by the sound of another gunshot and more screaming. It takes every part of his mental capacity to ignore that and focus on his boyfriend. “Phoenix, get down,” he begs. He can’t see Phoenix die like this. He’s already lost so much. Phoenix can’t get himself killed like this. Phoenix can’t die like his fa--
But then Edgeworth has an idea. It’s a terrible idea, but it has surprisingly worked before. He closes his eyes and takes a deep breath to calm himself. This was risky business and if he didn’t do this correctly, Wright’s life as well as his own were at stake. He makes a loud, choked noise before clutching his own chest.
“Miles!” He can hear Wright yell behind him, but this was no time for that. He continues to make choking noises before falling to the floor. If he was lucky, this would serve as a distraction. At the very least it would get Phoenix on the floor so he wouldn’t get shot.
He is right about the second part because within a few seconds Phoenix is on the ground and digging his fingers under Edgeworth’s cravat. But really, checking his pulse before even seeing if he was conscious? How moronic could Wright be? Though when he looks into his partner’s eyes, he isn’t prepared to see the genuine concern behind them. “I’m fine,” Edgeworth whispers and he sees the fear from Wright’s eyes dissipate. Understanding replaces it and now Edgeworth is sure they are on the same page. At least he hopes they are.
“What are you two doing?” The gunman from earlier yells. Edgeworth figures this is a good time to show off his acting skills and starts gasping for air.
Phoenix pulls Edgeworth into his lap. “My husband,” he immediately lies. It’s one of those lies that puts Edgeworth on, well, edge. The idea of marriage in general is unfortunate. He could never commit to that. Then again, he was already thirty-seven. Perhaps he should at least consider it. Marriage to Wright wouldn’t necessarily be a bad thing. “He has a heart condition. He needs help or he’s going to die.” And really, what kind of a lie is that? This was a bank robbery. This man had already killed people. Why would he care about a random man’s heart? This plan was absolutely ridiculous. He should’ve never thought of it.
Except by some miracle, it works. “Heart condition?” The gunman bends down to Wright’s level. “How can I help?” He’s distracted, and if he hadn’t already shot multiple people, Edgeworth would almost feel bad for what he and Phoenix were about to do.
Phoenix looks down at Edgeworth and once they lock eyes, they have a plan. Wright immediately throws his fist into the gunman’s face and Edgeworth goes for the gun. It’s not as much of a struggle as they had both thought it would be. It can’t even really be called a fight. It’s a tiff, if anything. How disappointing. But that was for the best. Now the gunman is on the floor and Edgeworth has the--
Edgeworth has a gun. He’s holding a gun. The last time he held a gun was when his father-- His father--
“Miles!” He hears someone call out his name and he realizes he’s shaking again. But of course he’s shaking. He’s holding a gun. The last time he held a gun, he killed his--
No. They’ve been over this before. He didn’t kill anyone. He didn’t kill his father. It wasn’t him. It was never him. Still, he can’t help but feel that if he hadn’t dropped--
Dropped…
Oh God, he dropped the gun.