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Sam could barely breathe, his heart hammering in his chest. He just had to wait a few more minutes. Sam could last that long. He had to last that long. Jack's life depended on it.
Dean was having a beer in the kitchen, but Sam could tell Dean was winding down for the night. He had the same sleepy expression on his face he always bore when Dean was maybe five minutes away from crashing, so it was really only a matter of time before he would call it a night.
After maybe five minutes or so, Sam could hear a clang of the beer bottle being dropped into the recycling bin, followed by Dean's heavy footsteps down the hall and the sound of Dean's bedroom door being shut. It was then that Sam sprang into action.
He raced down to the dungeon where the Ma'lak Box resided, holding his poor, panicking son. As he got closer, he could hear Jack's cries for him, his pleas to be saved, with a few 'Dean's peppered in.
"Sam!" Jack sobbed. "Sam, please! I don't like this! Dean! Sam! Please let me out!"
"I'm coming, Jack," Sam whispered. He burst through the doors, skidding to a halt beside the cage.
Because the Ma'lak Box is a cage. How could Sam ever put his kid in a cage like that? After everything that happened to Sam in hell, he put his son in an indestructible cage just like the one he had been in, just without the two angry archangels. Jack didn't deserve that.
If asked, Sam would say the adrenaline caused him to unlock his long-dormant powers, but that wasn't true. Sam always had his abilities, and he never stopped using them. Now, Sam had been clean for nine years; one more, and Sam would get a metaphorical medallion for his sobriety, but his recreational demon blood drinking never gave him his abilities. That's just what Ruby had tricked him into thinking. No, Sam could access his abilities just fine without the crutch of the demon blood, but training during the months alone after Dean and him had parted ways after Sam freed Lucifer allowed him to finetune his powers to what they were when he was so high he couldn't feel anything but the power in his veins.
Even now, in the closeness of the bunker, he would let a page turn when he just didn't have the energy to move. On hunts, a pointed look slowed down a demon's movements and reaction times, a glimpse into the future to help him find a victim. So when he snapped the locks with nothing but their mind, burning off the sigils, they were well prepared. Sam threw the lid off, revealing a crying Jack, trembling in panic. Sam wasted no time pulling his son into his arms, holding him so tightly as if he feared Jack would disappear if he let go.
"You came back!" Jack cried into Sam's shoulder, his voice muffled in flannel.
"I did. Jack, I'm so sorry. I would never leave you in there."
"Promise?"
"I promise," Sam swore. He pulled back from Jack but still held onto his son's shoulders. "Jack, listen to me. You need to go to the garage. Fly there, do not let yourself be seen. Dean cannot know you are out. I will be there as soon as possible, but if Dean catches you, you need to go. Just fly away. Find Cas, tell him what happened and that I broke you out."
"Sam-."
"I know, Jack, but I'm doing this to protect you. You need to go to the garage now. I will be there as soon as possible."
"But, my soul-"
"We'll figure it out," Sam promised.
"Sam-"
"Jack, go," Sam ordered.
With a fearful nod, Jack disappeared. Now was their only chance. Sam turned around, away from where he had been holding his kid, and looked back at the Mal'ak Box. Then, quickly, he placed the lid back on the metal prison before reconnecting the locks with a quick closing of his fist. He didn't bother with the sigils. They would take way too long to try to recreate.
Making haste, Sam raced up the stairs and down the hall, trying his best to quiet his footfalls. Finally, he turned into his room, rapidly throwing essentials into his duffel. Sam consistently kept the bag packed for hunts, but that just held the bare necessities; most of what he needed for hunting was in the Impala. So there was quite a bit of packing that needed to be done. Phone chargers and a random burner so Dean wouldn't be able to track his phone. Sam gave his old cell one last look, the cell that still held the voicemail Dean had left him in 2009. Sure, Dean had never made good on his promise to kill Sam, but Sam refused to give Dean a chance to kill Sam's son.
He threw in knives, his laptop and charger, and a couple of guns. Also, an old grey hoodie Sam had long ago stolen from Dean; he didn't think Dean even knew Sam had it. Next, his favourite sweatpants and sleep shirt that Sam never took out of the bunker, and other clothing items that meant something to him that weren't already in the bag, which included his favourite flannel, which was the only one he still had from his Stanford days. Finally, Sam grabbed the keys for the black 1970 Dodge Challenger Sam took whenever they went out alone. He grabbed his key to the bunker, one that could open every bunker in the world, including the one in Nevada that Sam was planning to run to.
Taking one last sweeping look at his bedroom, he nearly missed the photo of him and Dean. Well, if he couldn't have his brother in his life for a while, the best he could hope for was a photograph. So he threw the picture into the bag.
Next, Sam had to hit up Jack's room. Quietly, he slung the bag over his shoulder before quickly darting to Jack's room just down the hall. Over the two years that Sam had known Jack, Sam had gotten exceptionally acquainted with him, so it sufficed to say that Sam knew what to pack. He threw in the kid's favourite sweatpants and t-shirt, which just so happened to be the same sweatpants brand Sam wore. Next, he tossed jeans, t-shirts, sweaters, socks and sneakers, which still had velcro. Sam needed to teach that kid how to tie his laces. Next, he threw Jack's laptop, charger and Kelly's USB plug with her message into the bag. Sam grabbed the chocolate nougat bars from the drawer where Sam knew Jack had been hiding them. Jack thought he was being clever, but Sam knew.
Once he was sure that everything Jack could have wanted was packed, he turned around to leave. He barely made it three steps down the hall when he heard his brother's voice.
"Going somewhere, Sam?"
Sam froze, his heart hammering in his chest. "Dean." He softly spoke.
"Heya, Sammy."
Sam spun around. Dean was standing outside his room, looking tense, worried, and even a little angry. "I-"
"What's in the duffles?" Dean demanded. "You going on a hunt and forget to tell me about it?"
Think. "Yeah, there's a rugaru in eastern Missouri. Fairly routine. I should be back in a couple of days."
"And you were just going to go alone?" Dean pressed.
Sam nodded quickly. "Yeah, yep, just- just needed some alone time. Jack- he- I just need some time alone." Sam stammered.
"Right, and why the two bags?"
"Needed more stuff than I thought."
"What stuff?"
"Bunker books."
"Mhmm, well, you should probably get going then, huh," Dean suggested.
Sam nodded, turned, and was about to continue down the hall, hardly breathing, when Dean spoke again. "But, of course, and I feel dumb for asking this, that second bag isn't for Jack, now, is it?"
"What? No, of course not. Jack- Jack needs to stay in the box. He needs to be contained."
"I know that. And I know that you know that. Or I hope you understand that." Dean agreed.
"Right." Sam nodded, his heart hammering in his chest, turning to face his brother.
"So, and last question Sammy, if I went down to the garage with you, you would just leave for Missouri, right? Just you?"
"Dean, who else would be with me? You're here, Cas is out, and Jack is locked up."
"Right, well, you won't mind me seeing my little brother off, would you?" Dean asked.
Dean knows something's up. He has to. Sam jerkily nodded. "Yeah, yeah, no problem."
"Good."
"Jack, listen to me. Cloak yourself and hide in the backseat of the black Dodge Challenger. The black one that is closest to the garage door. Dean is following me, so do not let him see you." Sam prayed.
And while he never got any response, he wasn't expecting one, he knew Jack had received the message.
When they finally reached the garage, Sam had vowed a hundred times over that he would never touch caffeine again. He didn't think he could ever handle being this jittery again in his life. But, he thankfully kept his cool after roughly twenty years of hunting and training.
They reached the vehicle with no further questioning. And luckily for Sam, Jack was nowhere to be seen, which meant he had hidden as Sam had instructed.
Sam popped the trunk, depositing the bags into the back.
"Well, this is it. I'll see you soon." Sam lied. Sam had no intentions of seeing his brother anytime soon. Not until he could figure out what to do with the soul problem.
"Right, you call me if you need anything, or if you are," Dean paused, green eyes assessing Sam, "in over your head."
Sam swallowed nervously, nodding. "Right, of course."
"See you, Sammy."
Sam nodded again. "Bye, Dean."
As Sam climbed into the vehicle, he swallowed the lump of guilt lodged in his throat. He was doing the right thing. Sam had to be doing the right thing. His son's safety was his number one priority, even if it meant that he had to leave his brother behind.
So, as he pulled out of the garage, unable to look at the side mirrors where he knew Dean would be reflected, and drove off, headed for Nevada, Sam couldn't help but feel like he was betraying his brother once again. It was as though taking his son and running would somehow be the breaking point in their relationship. But how could Dean fault Sam? He'd treated Sam like his kid all their life. Dean once told him that Sam used to mistakingly call Dean 'Dad' when he was just a toddler. How far had Dean gone for family? He'd been Dad's perfect soldier, someone Sam could never be. He'd sold his soul for Sam so that Sam could live. So how was Sam taking care of his son any different to Dean taking care of Sam?
When they were maybe ten minutes away from the bunker and about to turn onto the highway, Sam breathed a sigh of relief.
"Jack? You can reveal yourself. It's safe." Sam announced.
Sam could see in his mirror when Jack appeared.
"Sam?" Jack asked.
"We're safe, kid. We'll figure this out, and when we do, we'll go home, okay?"
"Where are we going?"
"Nevada. There's a bunker there."
"How far is Nevada?"
"About sixteen hours away." Sam guessed.
"Sam, you didn't have to-"
"I did what I had to, Jack. We're going to figure this out, but until we do, we need to stay away from Dean."
"But he's your brother."
Sam jerkily nodded, holding back the tears gathering in his eyes. He hadn't lost Dean, but it almost felt like he was grieving. So much had happened, their mother was dead, and now they had to leave behind his brother. Maybe Sam was mourning a time in their life they couldn't get back.
"He is my brother, but you're my son. And right now, you come first." Sam whispered.
"Sam?" Jack spoke after a few minutes of silence.
"Yeah, kid?"
"There was no spell to fix my soul, right?"
Sam swallowed back the guilt. "No, Jack, there wasn't a spell."
"You lied?"
"Yeah, kid, I lied. But only so Dean would believe that I was on board. I was always going to break you out." Sam promised. He never considered leaving his kid in that cage for a moment.
"Why? I'm dangerous. I killed Mary. I deserve it." Jack said, staring at his shoes.
"And I released the devil the first time," Sam confessed.
"What?" Jack looked up.
"When I was twenty-four, I- I was working with a demon named Ruby." Sam took a deep breath. "She was teaching me how to use my powers."
"Your powers?"
"Yeah, kid, my powers." Without looking away from the road, Sam let the keys to the bunker float into the air, spinning around.
"Woah," Jack whispered in awe as if he couldn't do way more than Sam could ever dream of.
"She helped me learn how to use them, but she convinced me that in order to get stronger, I had to drink demon blood."
"Demon blood?"
"Yeah, but I drank so much of it that I became addicted," Sam murmured. "The addiction and power blinded me so much that I didn't see how off the rails I had gone. Ruby tricked me into killing Lilith. She said that it would save the world. She lied."
"What happened?" Jack sounded invested as if this was just another bedtime story.
"I killed Lilith. And I freed Lucifer."
"That's how he got out?"
"That's how he got out."
"What happened next?"
"Jack, you have to understand; I hated myself for what I did. I wanted to-" Sam took a breath. "And then Dean and I parted ways for a while. He didn't trust me. I didn't trust myself. And then I found out I was Lucifer's vessel."
"Lucifer told me once that you were his vessel." Jack agreed, like he was confirming Sam's story.
"Right, well, I was going through a really rough time. If I could take back what I did, I would. But Lucifer promised that if I died before he could use me, he would just bring me back." Said Sam. Sam wouldn't tell Jack that he tried to kill himself over and over before giving up. "So I reached out to Dean. At first, he didn't want me back. He thought I was too much of a risk, but he eventually accepted me back. It was a while before he trusted me again, but we got there."
"And then?"
"And then we found out that if I could trap Lucifer in my mind and jump into the cage with him riding shotgun, I could trap him in the cage. But that would also mean I would be trapped in the cage."
"That's why you were in hell," Jack said.
"Yeah, that's why I was in hell." Sam agreed. "I was there for a very long time. I know more about the devil than anyone in the world."
"I'm sorry."
"Don't be sorry. For a while, I thought I deserved it. I thought I deserved to suffer in hell, in the cage, for the rest of eternity. Even while Lucifer tortured me for decades, I thought I deserved it for what I did. Do you think I deserved it?"
"No, of course not!" Jack exclaimed.
"Do you think I deserved to stay locked in the cage?"
"No! Sam, you didn't deserve to be in hell!"
"Then why do you think you deserve to be locked in the Ma'lak box for killing Mary?"
"I-" Jack stopped.
"Jack, we're going to figure out how to get your soul back. We just need to hunker down and work until we find something. I won't let you be locked away for eternity for something that you never meant to do."
"Promise?"
"From the bottom of my heart."
"Okay," Jack whispered.
"Okay."
For now, it would be just the two of them. Sam knew Dean would be worried sick about him, and he felt guilty for that, but he had Castiel. It's not like Sam was leaving Dean all on his own. He would ask Cas to pass on messages for him to Dean while he worked on ways to get Jack back to normal, but he just couldn't let his son be around Dean for a while.
Sam was barely gone an hour when he heard a phone ring. Dammit, he had forgotten his backup cell was in the glove box.
"Sam?" Jack asked.
"Just don't say anything." Sam quickly said. "Don't make a sound." Jack nodded. Sam picked up the phone. "Hello?"
"Sam?" Cas.
"Yeah, yeah, Cas, it's me."
"Where is Jack?"
"Ask Dean."
"Sam, where is Jack?" Cas repeated, emphasising the 'where'.
Sam sighed. "He's with me."
"He's safe?"
"Yes."
" You're safe?"
"Cas, I'm fine. We're both fine."
" Well, Dean is acting like he's about to blow an aneurysm."
"Well, tell him I'm okay. I'm going to figure out how to get Jack's soul back."
"Sam, we have no idea if getting Jack's soul back is even possible."
"I know, Cas. But I need to try, at least. He's my kid. I'm not giving up on him.
"Well, can you please call your brother? He's acting," Cas paused, "erratic."
"What do you mean?" Sam asked. He really didn't need to ask, though. He could already guess what Dean was doing. As soon as Sam had left with Jack, Dean would have raced down to the dungeon and confirmed that Sam had broken Jack out. Whether Dean figured it out by the destroyed sigils or poorly fixed locks - Sam really hadn't stayed long enough to make them look convincing - or he knew all along, Dean knew. Sam was sure Dean knew Sam was up to something when he caught him with two duffles, but now Dean knew for sure. Dean would begin calling all of Sam's numbers, and when Dean wouldn't get an answer, he would start tracking them. All except the one he was talking to Cas on now would point back to the bunker. Which meant Sam had to dispose of the phone as soon as he could. Next, Dean would call Jody to see if she had heard from Sam. When that didn't pan out, Dean would call every hunter he thought Sam would contact before finally calling on Cas, forcing him to tell the angel what he'd done.
"He's been calling every cell you have. I'm surprised he hasn't gotten to this one yet." Cas mentioned. "He called Jody, Garth, Donna, Rowena and a couple of others, but when he got no answer to where you are, he called me."
"Yeah, I figured. I'm sure Dean will remember this number eventually. Cas, I'm sorry I didn't call you, but it was a matter of-"
" Sam, you don't have to apologise. I understand. You are doing what's best for Jack, just tell me where you are, and I'll find you."
"Cas, I can't do that. For a while, you and Dean can't know where we are. It's not that I don't trust you because I do. But I can't have someone questioning my decisions. Especially since I don't know what I'll have to do to get his soul back."
"Sam, you can't just expect me to let you do something potentially dangerous when I could be helping you." Cas chastised.
"Cas, it's not like I want to be doing what I'm doing, but it's what's best for everyone."
"Sam, putting your life in danger isn't what's best for anyone."
"Cas, this is my decision. Jack is my kid, and I'm not letting him live the rest of his life soulless just because I'm too scared to take risks. I know what it's like to have no soul, and I wouldn't wish that upon anyone." Sam countered. "It's empty and awful, you feel nothing.
"Sam, Jack is my kid too. Kelly asked me to watch over him." Cas softly responded though Sam could hear the desperate fear in the angel's voice.
Sam took a deep breath, eyeing Jack in the mirror to see his faux concerned face. Sam couldn't handle any more fake looks of sincerity from his kid, they just couldn't. "I know, Cas. But I need you to trust me. I know what I'm doing, and I promise I'll keep you updated."
"Sam-"
"Trust me, Castiel."
There was silence on the other end of the line for so long that Sam was worried that Cas had hung up in frustration. He was about to hang up himself when Cas spoke.
"I trust you. Just," Cas paused, " bring him home safe."
"I will."
It was three weeks before Sam figured out what to do. It was in some long-forgotten book he found in the Nevada bunker, written in Enochian. Who knows where the Men of Letters got the book. Sam doubted any of them could have read it, but he could. While there was nothing about the cage that Sam looked back on with fondness, especially not how Sam learned the language of the angels, speaking and understanding Enochian definitely came in handy from time to time. In fact, Sam was sure he spoke Enochian more fluently than English. On particularly bad days, Sam had to translate English to Enochian. But his knowledge of the archaic language was especially helpful when the answer to Jack's missing soul was written in the pages of the ancient text. The Men of Letter's Nevada bunker had so many books the Kansas bunker didn't have, and quite a few of them were written in Enochian. Sam would have to take some of those home with him when he was finished here. But at the moment,
"Jack?"
Jack looked up from the book Sam had instructed him to read through. "Yeah?"
"I have an idea."
Jack seemed to perk up. "You do?"
"It's risky, but if I draw on parts of my soul that are less damaged, I might be able to transfer it to you," Sam stated. "With your grace, the spell would remake the parts of my soul you take in your image so that it would be all yours."
"Isn't that dangerous?" Jack pressed, though his tone reeked of apathy.
"Well, yes, I'd guess so." Sam relented. "But, I'd expect anything we tried to get your soul back would be dangerous."
"Sam, are you sure? You don't have to do this. Getting my soul back was one thing, but using some of yours is something else entirely." Jack reasoned. The kid was very logical now that he didn't have a soul to cloud his judgement. "And shouldn't we at least call Cas and Dean, so they know what we're doing in case something goes wrong?"
Sam shook his head, smiling softly at his kid. He gently took Jack's hands in his. "Jack, you're my kid. I'd do anything for you to be whole again. If I have to take some of my soul to do that, then so be it."
Jack smiled with a slight nod. "How?"
A grin broke across Sam's face.
After completing the spell, which was both beautiful to watch as a silvery wispy substance - Sam's soul - poured from his chest into Jack's, incredibly painful for Sam, who felt like his insides were being ripped out, and exhilaratingly blissful for Jack who finally felt whole again, Sam staggered, bracing himself against a table, gasping for breath. Before he promptly collapsed to the floor, eyes rolling back, his head just narrowly avoiding the table as he fell. Now fully 're-soulled', Jack began feeling the fear, guilt and anxiety he should have felt before agreeing with Sam on the spell; the emotions Jack should have felt when he saw Sam in a rictus of pain and exhaustion as he pulled a glowing white, whispy soul from his chest. Jack, as selfish as he was in his soulless state, had greedily absorbed the soul, excited to return to normal and uncaring about what it did to his dad. Now, though, Jack's heart was pounding in his chest as he tried to rouse Sam, whose head was in Jack's lap, long legs in a fallen tangle.
"Sam! Sam, please!" Jack begged, shaking their shoulders. "Sam, I'm sorry, take it back. Take it back!" Jack felt tears in his eyes as he tried to rouse Sam to no avail. Finally, when Sam still didn't stir, Jack took a deep breath. "I'm sorry, Sam." Jack pulled Sam's new burner cell phone out of their pocket, quickly dialling Cas's number.
It rang twice before Cas answered. "Sam?"
"Cas! Cas, please, I need your help!"
"Jack? What happened? What's wrong?"
"We- it's Sam! He's hurt! I have a soul, but-"
"You have a soul?" Cas interrupted.
"What?" Jack heard Dean shout in the background.
"How?" Cas demanded.
"Well, and if I had had a soul, I never would have agreed to this, but we sort of used some of the less damaged parts of Sam's soul."
"You what!" Dean yelled.
"Jack, tell me exactly where you are. We can be there in a minute." Cas gently said though Jack could hear the fear in his voice.
"We're in the Men of Letters bunker in Nevada."
"Do you know the street name?"
"It's-" Sam would know. Sam knew everything. "I don't know! I don't know! I never went outside! Sam would know!"
"Okay, okay, calm down, Jack. We're going to track your location and find you. Try to remain calm." Cas instructed. "Have you tried-"
"Have you tried knuckling his sternum?" Dean demanded, cutting off Cas.
"What?"
"His sternum, make a fist and rub your knuckles against it in up and down motions. Don't be afraid to press hard. You're trying to wake him." Castiel instructed. In the background, Jack could hear Dean rapidly clicking keys as he tracked their location.
Jack quickly rubbed Sam's sternum, desperate to wake him. It took a couple of tries, but finally, Sam weakly opened their eyes with a groan.
"Sam!"
"What's happening?" Dean demanded.
"Jack?" Sam breathed.
Vaguely, Jack could hear Dean say, "Oh, thank god!" but he couldn't focus on that as he pulled Sam up to hug him.
"Sam!" Jack cried, clutching at the hunter desperately. "I'm so sorry! Please forgive me!"
Sam groaned from the tightness of the hug against his aching chest. "Jack, Jack, it's okay." Sam breathed, sounding exhausted, as Jack lowered him to his lap. "Did it work?"
"It worked, it worked! Thank you, Sam!"
"Good," Sam breathed, eyes half-mast, his breathing slow and quiet. "That's... that's good."
"Cas, I need your help! Something's wrong with Sam!"
"Sam! What's wrong!" Dean yelled over the phone.
"Nothin'," Sam slurred, "just tired."
"Jack! Keep him awake. We have your location! We'll be there in less than a minute!" Dean yelled.
Sure enough, while Jack tried desperately to keep Sam awake, Dean and Cas flew through the Nevada bunker's doors. They dashed down the steps, which were less than the ones in Kansas, but still a good amount. Quickly, the pair reached Jack and Sam, kneeling by them. Dean looked at Jack momentarily before nodding as he shifted Sam from Jack's lap to his.
Dean patted Sam's cheek, trying to keep them awake. "Hey, hey, Sammy. I'm here. I'm going to need you to wake up for me, okay?"
Oh, when had Sam closed their eyes? Jack wasn't sure. But slowly, Sam cracked his eyes open. "Hey, De'," Sam murmured. "I fixed him."
"You sure did, dumbass, at the expense of some of your soul." Dean both commended and chastised his brother. "How are you feeling?"
Sam hummed. "Tired."
"Cas?" Dean asked.
Cas placed a hand on Sam's forehead. Jack could see the warmth of Castiel's grace wash over his dad. Sam let out a soft sigh, relaxing further onto Dean's lap.
"He will be fine. His soul is depleted by about fifty per cent, the other half being in Jack. Jack's grace should be able to help protect the soul so it won't burn off when he uses his grace. Where Jack's soul is no longer dependent on his power, he should be able to continue to use his abilities without fear of his soul being burned off."
Jack felt a wave of excitement rush up into his chest. He had his soul again, and he wouldn't lose it. He was finally whole.
"And Sam?" Dean demanded. "Is he alright?"
"He used a lot of energy on the spell. Soul magic is no easy feat. I guarantee that if it weren't for Rowena's teachings, Sam wouldn't have been able to complete the spell. It most likely would have backfired, or Sam would have lost his soul again. But as it is, he is quite the accomplished witch, so he should be alright. He just needs a lot of rest. But yes, he should be fine."
"Does that mean I can sleep?" Sam slurred through a yawn.
"Yes, Sam, you can sleep." Cas nodded.
"'kay." Sam sighed, his eyes slipping closed.
"But we are having a conversation about this later. And about the fact that you lied about your powers being gone." Dean warned though the warning fell on deaf ears as Sam slipped into blissful unconsciousness.
When Sam awoke, he was back in his room in Kansas. He wasn't sure if Cas or Jack brought them back or if he slept through the sixteen-hour car ride back to Kansas, but one thing was certain; he had never had a better sleep in his life. With half-open eyes, he looked around. Dean was asleep in an armchair that Sam was positive belonged to the library. Cas was reading at his desk a book that looked suspiciously like the Enochian book on soul magic Sam had used from the Nevada bunker's library. Sam would have to go back there at some point. There were a lot of books that their bunker didn't have that Sam would very much like to.
"Cas?" Sam whispered, still groggy from sleep, which seemed to call for them once more.
Cas looked up from the book, placing a finger on his lips to keep Sam quiet. "How are you, Sam?" Cas whispered.
Sam assessed themself for a moment. He didn't have the aches and pain from the spell anymore, or if he did, it was minute. Though, despite the wonderful feeling of refreshment from the sleep, he couldn't be more tired. "Fine. Tired, but fine."
"You took on quite the risk doing that spell," Cas informed him. "You could have lost your soul; you could have caused an explosion worth three nukes; you could have died, Sam." Cas had such worry in his eyes that it almost made Sam feel guilty, but Jack was whole again. How could Sam feel guilty about that?
Sam nodded, remembering the pain that had erupted from their chest when he drew power from his soul. It felt like someone was reaching inside his chest and pulling out their lungs. Like they couldn't breathe. The spell felt like it was ripping him apart. If it weren't for their fierce love for his son, Sam wouldn't have been able to continue the spell. "I know, Cas, but he's my son. I couldn't let him-"
Just as Sam was about to continue with his reasoning, he felt a shift by his side. It was only then did he notice the sleeping Nephilim curled into his side. Sam raised an eyebrow at Cas.
"He refused to leave your side." Came Cas's reply.
"He's okay, right?" A pang of worry blossomed in Sam's chest.
"Thanks to you." Cas nodded.
"Then I don't regret it for a moment." Sam decided.
Cas smiled at Sam with the same eyes that made him feel like the angel was worried about him. "He's lucky to have you. I love him, Sam. Kelly asked me to take care of her son, but really, he's yours. A blind man could see it. He looks up to you and loves you. And despite his parentage, you've never made him feel anything other than loved."
Sam stifled a yawn. "He's my son, Cas. I would give anything for him. Lucifer destroyed me from the inside out, but Jack has nothing to do with that. He didn't choose his father."
Cas studied him for a moment before finally speaking."Lucifer may be his father, but you are his dad."
A warm feeling spread in Sam's chest. Looking down at his sleeping son, he placed a kiss on the fluffy, light brown-haired head, smiling as Jack nuzzled into Sam's side, cheek pressed against Sam's favourite hoodie - Dean's hoodie. Fuck, Dean would surely know that Sam had taken his hoodie now. Eh, a problem for later. Dean wasn't getting it back anyway. He'd taken it all the way to Nevada. He wasn't letting it get away from him that easily.
"Dean was really worried about you, you know." Cas murmurs. "And he was even more stressed when he realised that you still had your abilities. How you managed to hide them all this time, I don't know."
Sam looked up from his sleeping son to face the angel, ignoring how Jack's warmth made him increasingly tired. "For a little while, I just pretended they didn't exist. But they didn't go away. So, while Dean and I were apart after I let out Lucifer, I learned how to use them without drinking demon blood. I still use them from time to time. Small things, like telekinesis, inhibiting a demon's movements, that sort of thing. Obviously, I never used them on hunts, I always chickened out, but I guess that can change now since you and Dean know, but they can be helpful sometimes." Sam explained, letting out a sigh. "And yeah, I know I worried him. I always worry him, but I did what I had to do. You understand that, right, Cas?"
"Of course, I understand why you did it, Sam. I didn't like it, but I understood. But the days you forgot to call, he was certain you were dead. Sam, I was worried. We both were. But I trusted you, I trust you to make the best decisions for Jack. But, your brother is very stubborn. It took everything in my power to stop him from going on a wild goose chase."
Sam huffed out a laugh. "Thank you, Castiel. And thank you for trusting me."
Cas nodded. "Of course, Sam. If there's one thing I know about you, it's that you would do anything for your family."
Sam shifted his gaze from Cas to the alarm clock by his bed which read in bold red lights 05:22. Suddenly, something dawned on him, how long had he been asleep? "Cas? How long was I out?"
"Three and a half days."
Sam gaped at him. "Three and a half days," Sam repeated. So they really shouldn't be tired, then.
"As I said, the spell took a lot out of you, as well as the effects of using your soul. The fact that you were awake at all after the spell was a miracle." Cas emphasised. "A true testament to the Winchester stubbornness."
"Has Dean slept?" Sam asked, ignoring the worry in Cas's voice.
"Not much, but I put him to sleep at eleven. He really needed it."
"He's not going to like that, but thank you. He needs it. I assume that's why he hasn't woken up?"
Cas nodded. "I thought it would be best. He should wake up around noon."
"Thirteen hours, huh? I think," Sam paused, stifling a yawn. "I think that's more than we've ever gotten in our lives."
Cas's eyebrows crinkled, his head cocked his head to the side in confusion. "Surely you've slept more than thirteen hours in your lives. You've slept more than thirteen hours in the ten years I've known you."
"No, Cas." Sam laughed. "I mean consecutively."
"Oh, I see." Cas nodded, understanding in his eyes.
Sam yawned, feeling the heavy pull of sleep weigh on his eyes. "Sorry," Sam murmured, feeling unconsciousness pull on his mind.
"Sleep, Sam. We'll still be here when you wake up."
"Thank you, Cas." Sam sleepily responded, tucking his scruffy with stubble cheek into Jack's hair.
"Of course."
As Sam drifted off to sleep, he could have sworn he heard Cas whisper, "Jack is lucky to have you."