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On the other side of this system’s star there was... something, definitely a something, deep in hibernation inside of an asteroid. Rey could feel the steady thump of it’s heart, slow and waiting, just as she could feel the current of an ocean below the frozen surface of one of this planet’s moons, and the low whirring of R2-D2’s circuitry on the beach far below her in the Falcon. She could feel these things the way she felt wind rustle the grass below her crossed legs onto the skin of her bare calves and she tried to let the experiences flow through her, taking note of each one, acknowledging it and letting it go. But there was something about that thumping heart that made her sad. She squinted her eyelids together even harder than before and tried to focus on her breathing. This was an exercise in feeling the Force and she wasn’t about to ruin the afternoons work with some stray thoughts. Again. But despite her best efforts to clear her mind, Rey’s train of thought brought her back to the last time she had heard a heart beat that slow, her ear pressed against Finn’s chest on one of her last evenings with the Resistance before departing to find Luke.
“It’s normal, dear.” An attendant in the medical facility had told her, their tone clipped with sympathy so precise that it must be fake, “With damage to the back as extensive as this the best way to stop him from injuring himself further was to induce a comatose state.” There was a pat on her shoulder and Rey felt herself flinch away from it. “But he’s healing fine.”
It wasn’t until after the attendant left that Rey folded herself over Finn’s body, resting her weight on her hands on either side of his torso, and let herself be comforted by the slow, but even, sound of his heart. She knew she would have to leave soon. General Organa had approached her almost immediately after the debriefing regarding their escape. Rey was to seek Skywalker, learn to control this strange gift, and, if he was willing, bring him back to the Resistance. And in a bout of what she knew was terrible selfishness, Rey wished that someone would be willing to wake him up in time for her to say goodbye, injuries healed or not. She just didn’t want him to feel like she had abandoned him.
“Rey.” The memory scattered from Rey’s mind as she blinked her eyes open to the dazzling sunlight scattering off of the endless ocean on the horizon. The shadow of Luke Skywalker fell over her. She waited for another lecture (her actions were precise, Luke had told her many times over their last few months together, but her thoughts wandered far without a tether) but what he said next sent a ripple of excitement through her body, strong enough that he surely felt it through the humming connection that they shared, “I think it’s time to go back.”
~~~
To be honest Rey had been expecting a bit more... well, just more considering that the Millennium Falcon had just landed in the Resistance base in the middle of this planets night carrying the legendary Luke Skywalker. But, no, with the exception of quite possibly the exact same sentries stationed around the docking area as when she left, only General Organa stood to greet them. It wasn’t like she was expecting a parade; this was a war effort after all, but... No, it was silly. Rey shook her head and gave the General a curt nod as the older woman’s eyes briefly swept the scene. And then the siblings fell into the most expressive, and lengthy, starring contest that Rey had ever had the pleasure of witnessing. She turned to share a look of ‘are you seeing this, too?’ before realizing that no one else had come to greet her upon her return, despite the message of their arrival that she and Chewbacca had transmitted the moment they entered the range of this star system. Right. Suddenly it felt like all of the planet’s gravity hit her at once and she cleared her throat lightly to break the two, her superiors now she supposed absently, out of whatever spell they had cast around themselves. The General turned to her as though surprised that she was still there, “General-sorry, are my quarters the same as when I departed?” Rey asked, feeling hopelessly out of place amongst them.
The General, Leia as Luke referred to her on their trip, opened her mouth to speak and then closed it, a thoughtful look on her face before replying in the affirmative. “Of course, you both must be exhausted from such a long trip.” The last four words were delivered more sharply with a side-eye towards Luke, who rolled his eyes in return. It wasn’t until that moment that Rey had been able to picture them as brother and sister. “Come along, Luke. We have much to discuss.” With that the General, Jedi, and Chewbacca each gave Rey a nod of recognition before sweeping round and heading towards the HQ. Rey shook her head as she hitched her bag higher on her shoulder and made her way to the opposite end of the base. Weird few months. Very, very weird few months.
And where the hell was Finn?
Fine, she could admit it to herself out of the presence of the mind readers, there was a large part of her that had been expecting him there for her to come back to. Come... home to? When she said good-bye she had been completely earnest when she told him they’d meet again. It wasn’t just hope. It felt... bigger than that. She knew it the same way she knew the things inside of Kyl- Ben’s head. He would’ve been healed by now, she knew, the medical attendants had sworn it to her before she left. Though, she sighed as she entered the entrance code into the complex where her previous quarters were located, maybe normal people just didn’t wait around all the time; maybe they moved on when they were left behind. Before everything, the Starkiller base and the Force and secret maps, Finn had been looking to get as far away from this fight as possible. She couldn’t blame him, not really. But she could track his arse down the minute she was through mastering this strange new gift and avenging Han. She would not be made a liar. As the doors to her room pulled apart with a mechanical groan, she satisfied her disappointment with the resolution that Finn was just going to be stuck with her.
And then Finn was just standing in front of her.
“Rey!”
“Finn!”
They shouted at each other in the same breath, the shock that Rey felt was mirrored on his face, but it quickly gave way to a wide toothy smile. His face was just as wildly expressive as she remembered. As she was still amazed by. The edges of her lips pulled into a grin, the surprise being steadily replaced with what she thought might be delight. And then he was gathering her in his arms with so much force that it lifted her clear off the ground. The instant he made contact Rey realized that this was the welcome she had been hoping for and she wound her arms up his back, squeezing his shoulders with all her might, only just thinking to avoid where his injury had been.
“I missed you so much.” He whispered into her hair, and she was taken aback by how free he was with his emotions. Like the ability to express them had been storing up and he had to let them go all at once. She buried her nose into the juncture where his neck met his shoulder. He was so solid and present.
“I-I missed you too.” If he could say it, so could she. It was like a challenge to meet him stride for stride in this new world they were discovering together. “I missed you before I even left.”
“Did you just get back?” Finn loosened his grip only enough so her feet could firmly plant on the ground and he could speak to her face-to-face. He looked confused, but infinitely pleased.
Rey nodded, “Didn’t you know?”
“No,” He gave his head a shake in disbelief, “I would’ve met you at the Falcon. BB-8 and Poe, too. Everything to do with Skywalker is top classified. I had to beg the General to tell me why you left and then she wouldn’t even tell me where.” His eyes became very serious and it made Rey want to shrink away under the weight of it. Or maybe melt back into him. “The best pilot here owes me a favour. I would’ve followed.” Yes, Rey thought as she pulled herself back into his chest, definitely the latter option.
After the adrenaline had drained out of her body after the battle on the Starkiller base something had changed with the way Rey saw the world, not technically saw though, but sensed. Like something she had always been able to smell, but had only just noticed. Or the heat from a candle that she hadn’t been able to feel while standing under the sun. She first experienced it with Chewbacca; she could see him and hear him and also... sense him, something about him that felt like a moss covered tree on a crisp night. It was stronger in the General, a bustling static, like the air right after a blaster had gone off. Luke had explained it later as her awareness of the Force awakening, the ability to feel it through and around all things. But, at the time, all she knew was that she could barely feel anything coming from Finn. Something about him had been missing in the induced sleep. Now Rey squeezed her eyes shut and let herself be surrounded by him, the heat of his skin, the comforting thump of his heartbeat, and how he felt like the first time she stepped off the Falcon onto Takodana; a crystal lake surrounded by lush greens, a sun kinder than any she had ever known, and the slightest hint of humidity with each breath that promised something exciting and beautiful.
“Did you come straight here?” Finn asked a little breathlessly, breaking her out of her meditation on him
“Well, these are my quarters.”
“Ah!” Finn released his hold on her, taking all the heat in the room with him it seemed, and stepped back with a slightly puzzled look on his face, “I thought- I mean these are my quarters. They were assigned to me after, you know.” His hand gestured loosely behind him.
“Oh.”
“I mean, don’t worry, there’s couches in the common area that are way better than a lot of the barracks I’ve be-“
“Finn.” Rey cut him off sharply, despite the way his offer made her feel rather soft and all of her previous exhaustion must have slipped away the moment she saw him, “Stay. There’s so much I want to tell you.”
“Yeah- I mean yes, of course.”
Hours later, as the sun was just starting to tint the horizon pink, Rey found herself laying flat on the thin bunk pressed all along the side of Finn with their hands entwined between them as they stared at the ceiling. She had explained, as best as she could, what had happened after he had been knocked out by Kylo, “Ben” she kept correcting herself, and had begun to describe the first meeting with Luke. “And then of course the second he agreed to train me I made him furious.”
“What?” Finn asked with the strangled laugh that had begun to accompany their conversation as they both started to find every statement disproportionately hilarious within the last, early hour.
“Oh, I asked him if I should call him Master Skywalker.” Rey pronounced with a lofty tone that made Finn shake with s barely contained giggle beside her. “And then...” While her eyes had been moist in the corners from her laughter, they dried as a sudden wave of the same shame and fear she had felt in that moment overcame her and she felt her face and voice turn stony at the edges, “And then he said he wouldn’t be anyone’s master, not again.” Finn reacted instantly to the change in her tone, growing still for a moment before releasing her hand to shift to his side and stare down at her with his eyes large and gentle. “But he’d still teach me, he said, for my own safety. I was too terrified that he’d change his mind so I didn’t press, but I still don’t know what he meant by that.”
“Rey...”
“Am I- Is this thing I can do dangerous?”
“Rey.”
“You saw what happened to Ben; what he became. And he had everything I didn’t. A family and a home and a childhood...”
“Rey!” Finn cradled her chin in his palm, his hand spanning the length of her face, the contact shocking her into a careful silence. “I know Han Solo was this big legend to you and I have so much respect for General Organa and what she’s doing, but...” He sighed and Rey could feel the warm puff of air on her nose, “But their son was just a kid and he wasn’t as strong as you are. Do- do you think that just because you can’t remember where you came from means you can’t have a good heart?”
Rey stared at Finn, so open and vulnerable and clearly not just asking about her, and felt like in any other situation, with any other person, she would be embarrassed by letting her nerves get to her like that. But with Finn she didn’t feel shame, just comfort, and she wanted to return it to him twofold. And just as her lips were trying to form the right words to tell him that he possessed the best heart that she had ever known Rey was struck by the thought that while some people may always know exactly what to say, she had a knack for knowing just what to do. In the same way she had trusted her body to know exactly how to wield a lightsaber in a duel to the death, she let her instincts guide her now as she tilted her head up only the slightest fraction out of his gentle grasp and kissed Finn until both of their doubts and insecurities evaporated in the heat between them.
It was... uncoordinated to say the least. Rey had rarely seen people kiss, usually only vulgar displays from wandering traders in the corner of a cantina on Jakku, but this didn’t feel coarse and possessive like those instances had appeared. It felt sweet. He had hesitated only for the briefest moment before responding eagerly with a smile she could feel against her lips. It had made her smile in response and for a moment they were just grinning into each other before Finn used the hand still positioned along her cheek to tilt her face just a smidge so their noses brushed and their mouths began moving in an uncoordinated rhythm. It made her feel like she was made of light, gentle and low like the rising sun that was turning the walls around them pale orange. And then, following her instincts that had yet to steer her wrong with him, she parted her lips moving Finn’s along with her own and moved her tongue gently along his lower lip. His responding groan added burst of heat to the light she was feeling and she pulled away as a barely audible gasp rose out of her throat.
“Are you okay?” Finn asked immediately, his eyes laser focused on her’s once more, his fingers still softly brushing her cheek.
“I’m amazing.” It was the truth and he deserved to hear it for being the one to make her feel that way. Rey smiled wide at him before tucking herself into his side. “I’ve just never done that before.” Finn’s arms wrapped around her and squeezed her tight into his chest where she could feel his heartbeat setting a rapid pace. That felt amazing too.
“Wow, me neither.” He replied and Rey could just hear the smile in his tone, “Was it good? It seemed really good.”
“It was good,” Rey confirmed solemnly.
“We should definitely do that again sometime.”
“Definitely,” She parroted, letting a yawn escape as she entangled her legs with his, if only to get more comfortable.
“Are you falling asleep?” He asked, his voice lowering to a whisper.
“I’d like to.”
“Should I go?”
“No.”
~~~
Rey was in water, a body of it as endless as the ocean she had stared at every day for the past two months, but warm unlike anything she had ever felt. The heat was to her back, like she was floating on her stomach with the sun shining downwards, but there was no panic or uncertainty. Only a gentle current that surrounded her and flowed through her as she experienced various states of awareness. She couldn’t remember feeling more rested, content to spend the rest of her day just floating in this feeling, when all of a sudden the waters became rougher and a wave of cold splashed over her back. That wasn’t right, Rey thought to herself, rolling over to chase the fading warmth that had been surrounding her. She could hear lowered voices that almost made sense, both masculine, and one that was not at all unfamiliar to her dreams.
“...ut up, man. Gimme one second.” The mechanical groan of the doors sliding shut. Had she heard them open?
“Whassit?” Rey lifted her head from the pillow, blinking into the brightly lit room, her mouth too dry for her words to form quite right. She heard Finn’s low chuckle and the bed sank as he sat on it next to her prone form. She had spread herself diagonally across the mattress with her upper half rolled onto the side he had previously inhabited.
“It was just Poe checking in. I didn’t show up for duties this morning.”
“Poe?” Rey asked. She knew him. She knew she knew him, but faces and names weren’t matching like they were supposed to just yet.
“I have to get going, but you should go back to sleep. I...” She could hear a slight tremor of nervousness in his voice and she gave her hand a flailing wave to urge him on. Finn leaned down, she could sense his weight looming over her, and placed a light, lingering kiss right above her ear, “I’ll see you tonight.” And then the shadow of him and the dip in the bed were gone as Rey slipped back into her ocean, the water colder for the lack of his presence.
~~~
“General.” Rey nodded respectfully as she stood before Leia and Luke at the head table of the mess hall part way through what seemed to be lunchtime.
“Ah, Rey!” General Organa gestured to the seat across from her, “Please join us. I’m glad to see you up and about. The lag going from one planet’s rotation to another can be jarring. I trust your accommodations were suitable?”
“Of course.” Rey replied smoothly. It had struck her when she had awoken for the second time that obviously the General had known that Finn was assigned to her former quarters. Before Rey left Leia had assured her that she would take a special interest in the new recruit who had been so crucial to disabling the First Order’s most deadly weapon. It bothered Rey that her feelings were so apparent to someone she barely knew but, as she tried to read the energy around the General and found nothing more malicious than a hint of mischief, she supposed that was the cost of having acquaintances versed in the ways of the Force. She assumed that if she had any objections to the arrangement a different accommodation could be found. Worst case scenario she would be happy to sleep in her bunk on the Millennium Falcon. If she had any objections, that is. “I apologize for sleeping so much of the day away.” This she addressed to the man sitting beside her.
“No matter,” Luke waved his hand in a dismissive gesture, “I’ve been in discussion with my sister for the most part of the morning anyway. We shall resume your training, here amongst the Resistance, at dawn tomorrow.” He paused as a droid approached the table and placed a plate of food in front of Rey. She had never seen a plate loaded with so much food and as the steam wafted the smell of it to her nose it suddenly felt as if she hadn’t eaten for years. But Luke opened his mouth to speak again and Rey mournfully recalled that a Jedi must have discipline. “Our pace will be slower here so you must temper your expectations. Your weakness is your focus and with the energies that swirl amongst this place you will have to concentrate more than ever.”
Rey nodded sharply, “I can do it. I promise that to you.” And it would be worth it, in the end, to be here along with her friends.
Luke smiled, the lines around his bright eyes crinkling, “Your will is strong. “ He nodded down to her plate, “But I can hear your stomach. Go on. Leia?” He and the General rose as the droid swung round once more to clear their empty plates. Rey, needing no second invitation, began cutting into the meat on her plate with ferocity.
“It’s good to have you amongst us once more, Rey.” The General smiled fondly down at her as Rey gulped down her first bite and raised her head to stare back, “I’m sure we’ll be seeing much of each other.”
“Of course.” Rey responded, marvelling once again at how a scavenger from Jakku could find herself with a place in the Resistance, a lightsaber on her belt, and with a plate full of food waiting to be devoured in front of her. And, a stray thought supplied, a memory of a kiss so recent and fresh in her mind that the very recollection of it made her cheeks heat and heart race. She spun in her seat to make sure that Luke and Leia had left the area. Mind readers. She really did need to get a hang that concentration thing. But, first things first, was lunch.
~~~
After her meal Rey had every intention of going for a run around the perimeter of the base in an attempt to tire herself out as to adjust her sleep schedule to the planet’s rotation, but as she made her way towards the docking bay in search of the exit she found herself in the bustling hanger that held the majority of the Resistance’s X-Wing fleet. Rey wandered in awe, weaving through the busy mechanics and pilots who marched with what seemed like the weight of the galaxy on their shoulders. She was just peering over the head of a man welding a damaged wing when she heard a familiar series of whistles from a few ships down the aisle. Waiting for a line of pilots to pass, Rey ducked amongst their ranks until she spotted a droid with the distinct orange and white colouration beeping rapidly at a man that she recognized from her previous time at the base, Finn’s friend Poe.
“BB!” Rey called excitedly making her way to the pair. BB-8 spun it’s head around and let out a loud chirp before twisting it’s body and rolling into Rey’s legs at a considerable speed. “Ooof. It’s good to see you too. Staying out of trouble, I trust?” BB-8 let out a cheerful whirr in reply.
“Rey!” Poe exclaimed, extending his hand above the head of his droid. Rey grasped it and he gave her whole arm a hearty shake, “It’s great to have you back! Finn hasn’t shut up about you since he woke up.” He gave her a wink, “Though it seems like he still has plenty to say now that you’re here too.” She felt heat rise to her cheeks as she remembered now who Finn had said came to the door this morning, but Poe just let out a good natured laugh.
“I’m glad we can meet again under more fortunate circumstances.” Rey said hastily trying to change the subject. The only time she had conversed with him before had been while they both sat in the presence of Finn’s lifeless form after the Starkiller Base had been destroyed, when the consistent beeping of the monitors had drowned out every other noise and there wasn’t anything to say except platitudes about healing and time. He seemed more free now, unburdened, and she supposed that she must seem the same way,
“Of course, I hear that you were the best pilot on Jakku until I landed there. I’m sure we have a lot to talk about.” Rey laughed again and she could understand what Finn had meant last night when he said that it was impossible not to be friends with Poe Dameron. “Finn and I usually take dinner in the mess at 1800 hours, if you don’t have any special Jedi business.”
“No, actually.” Rey was pleased that he had mentioned Finn, not knowing exactly how to ask where he was and what he was doing for the Resistance, “I don’t begin, um, Jedi business until tomorrow.”
“Excellent.” Poe exclaimed as he wrapped his arm around her shoulder and steered her back towards the X-Wing he and BB-8 had been working on, “I swear my baby has started veering to the left when I hit atmo, but I can’t get any of these mechanics to believe me and I hear you know your way around a ship.”
“Seems like you hear a lot of things about me.”
“Like I said, the kid doesn’t shut up.”
~~~
Dinner that night was the best meal that Rey could ever remember attending. As she entered the mess hall with Poe, engine grease washed from her hands but still streaking all up her arms, she saw Luke once again at the head table with the General. He raised an eyebrow at her, but she just replied with a wave and continued with Poe to grab some plates piled high with food before settling at the end of a long table across from each other. Her stomach rumbled, but Rey couldn’t concentrate on eating for more than a few moments at a time before her eyes flicked around the room.
“The only thing about this place that makes me miss Coruscant is the food.”
“Really?” Rey asked through a mouthful of something mashed and buttery and warm and maybe the best thing she’d ever eaten. “Is this bad?”
“Hmmm.” Rey, through their incredibly short acquaintance, expected Poe to laugh off her question like he seemed to do with everything else, but instead he looked at her thoughtfully. Nervously she dabbed around her mouth with a napkin. “I suppose it’s a matter of perspective.” He finally replied.
“What’s Coruscant like? Is it true that it’s just one city covering the whole planet?”
“Yeah,” Poe nodded into his plate, “It’s loud. Constantly. And you can never see the stars.” He seemed so forlorn when he said that and Rey was about to ask if that was why he wanted to become a pilot when she suddenly felt something, an awareness that tickled the back of her neck. She held a finger up to Poe who looked like he was about to ask what was wrong and tried to focus on that feeling, bring it to the forefront of her mind. It was... pleasant. Not something dangerous so she didn’t feel the need to search out Luke in her thoughts. It felt like... a clear lake and slightly humid air.
“I think Finn is coming.” She said in a low voice, mostly to herself, but Poe’s eyebrows rose into his hairline and he twisted in his seat towards the entrance just a moment before Finn indeed came striding in, his eyes scanning the room until he found their table and broke into a huge grin before heading to grab his own plate.
“Did you just use the Force?” Poe leaned in to excitedly whisper to her.
“I didn’t use the Force.” Rey whispered back, not entirely sure how secret her abilities were supposed to be, “The Force just kind of... happens sometimes.”
“Well if it isn’t my two favourite people!” Finn exclaimed dropping his plate beside Rey’s and sliding himself onto bench next to her, their sides touching from shoulder to toe, the soft leather of his jacket cool against her bare arm. Rey let herself apply the slightest pressure against him and shovelled another bite of the mashed stuff into her mouth in order to hide the silly grin that was threatening to plaster itself on her face. “What did everyone get up to today?”
Poe started recounting his argument with the groups of mechanics who kept insisting he was imagining any mechanical issues in his X-Wing after it had came out clean in the scan, “Like I wouldn’t be able to tell.” He scoffed. When he got the part where Rey had decided to flush the steering mechanism and “Just chunks of brown sludge came out. I’ll have to wait till tomorrow for a test run, but I’m thinking that’s gotta be the problem. It’s not supposed to be chunky, right?” Finn just laughed and beamed proudly while beneath the table he moved his foot against her’s in a way that sent shivers down her back. And then Finn started sharing the stories from his day, sifting through intel with the intelligence officers.
“Like spies?” Rey asked, incredibly interested to know what sort of place Finn had carved out for himself here.
“Yeah, I guess.” He laughed and shook his head, “I mean I’m no good a subterfuge. At all. But I can help with decrypting First Order transmissions up until the ones a few months ago. And I have an idea of what’s real information and what’s just the decoy stuff. I don’t think I’ll be useful for that much longer though. Everything I know is getting pretty outdated by now.”
“Help me convince him that he ought to get himself behind a control panel on a ship.” Poe chimed in while giving Rey a conspiratorial look. She laughed and turned to Finn only to find him gazing at her with a serious expression. He blinked, flustered at being caught staring, and turned down towards his plate.
Rey spent the rest of the meal working through the huge pile of food she had served herself, simply out of the joy of being able to do so, and listening to the easy chatter between Finn and Poe, laughing at the friendly insults that were passed back and forth every so often. Her belly was full and she was surrounded by friends. A warmth spread through her and, as she realized that the mess hall was almost completely cleared of people by this point, she felt tired. Not hungry and worn down. Just content and ready to go to bed after a full day spent well. Pushing herself away from the table and off of the bench, Rey announced that she had to be up early for training the next day and to please excuse her. Poe just waved her off with a cheerful goodnight, while Finn looked shocked for a moment before jumping up along side her.
“Me too. I mean- I should go to bed too. And I’ll walk with you, if you want.” Rey felt herself blush again as Poe let out a bark of laughter, but she just nodded, entwined her fingers with Finn’s, and let him lead her out of the mess hall into the cool air as they headed towards the complex that their quarters were in. They walked in silence for the most part, with her focusing of the feel of his fingers against hers, until he started to punch in the entrance code.
“I hope you don’t mind that I didn’t ask the General to arrange for a different room for me?” Rey asked, almost positive that he didn’t, but it felt rude not to check.
“Not at all.” Finn responded seriously as the doors pulled apart.
“Good,” They walked in silence halfway down the hall until she added, “Because I think we should try that kissing thing again.” Finn turned to look at her quickly and she couldn’t help but laugh at his awe-filled expression, the breath rushing out of her as he started pulling her towards their room at an increased pace.
She had wanted to tease him a little, insist that they get ready for bed properly first, wash the day off themselves and the oil and grease from her arms, but the second the door shut behind her Rey felt herself pressed flat against it, Finn wrapped entirely around her with his lips hovering just a fraction of an inch above her own. Maybe tonight she was too impatient for teasing too. She wondered, as she pushed herself upwards to close the distance between them, if he had been thinking about this all day as well. If, in the middle of whatever files he’d been perusing, the memory of the kisses they shared last night bombarded his thoughts like they had hers. Given the enthusiasm with which he was pressing himself against her as their mouths, maybe a bit more coordinated than their first attempt, moved with each other, she assumed that he had been. This time it was Finn who parted his lips first and Rey mentally prepared herself for the shivers that wracked through her as his tongue brushed against her own lips.
Back on Jakku, as they worked at scrubbing clean the day’s finds, the older women would sometimes tell stories about their past; about handsome traders, dashing rogues, and scandalous liaisons that would make Rey blush and the older women in turn would giggle at her prudishness. And then they would sigh forlornly while looking into the distant dunes, leaving Rey to wonder if it was all worth it for just a few days of passion. Now, with one of Finn’s hands tangled in her hair, half undone from his ministrations, and the other holding onto her side with his thumb rubbing circles on her hip just below the hem of her tunic, she could definitely see their point. The utter quantity of feelings and sensations he was inspiring in her was staggering and confusing, but something she fully intended to pursue further. After all, they had much more than just a few days together.
They spent... maybe another quarter of an hour, Rey was too distracted to properly keep track of the time, just exploring the different speeds and pressures that they could apply to get reactions out of the other. Finn had even gone as far as to lightly sink his teeth into her bottom lip and Rey was struggling to come up with a good way to give into the urge to rub herself closer to him while still being pressed into the door when his mouth left hers and a fairly embarrassingly breathless whine left her throat in response to their absence. He replied with another light peck and then stepped back only far enough that their bodies were no longer flush against each other, his forehead resting softly on her own. They both caught their breath in silence before Finn started chuckling lowly, his breath tickling the strands of hair loose on her cheeks. She laughed along with him and he sighed in a wonderfully content way.
“So this is kind of the best thing ever, right?” He asked.
“Then why did you stop?” Rey said, a little huffily. He laughed harder at that, stepping away from her fully and bringing his arm up to rub the back of his neck bashfully. The strip of skin revealed from his shirt riding up gave Rey a sudden curiosity to exactly what his skin there felt like and really why did he stop?
“We could-I guess I mean if you want to we can...” He trailed off and bit his lip. “It’s just, I know you said you had to be up early and I only have, like, five more hours until I have to wake up at this point.”
“What?” Rey turned to look at the computer panel above the nightstand. Apparently a quarter of an hour had been a bad estimate. “Oh! Oh no, you’re right.” She pressed a palm to her forehead. Getting up at the crack of dawn was hard enough when she got a full night’s sleep. Finn laughed again and pulled her hand away from her face and brought it to up so he could kiss her palm. It was achingly sweet after the hour they had spent in a passionate embrace.
“There’s always tomorrow night.” He suggested hopefully.
Rey laughed in response and pressed another light kiss to his lips, before pulling her hand away and heading to the adjoining lavatory to wash up for the night. When she returned Finn was already tucked into what she was already thinking of as his side of the bed. She rounded to the other side and pulled the covers over herself. “Goodnight.” She whispered. Finn turned with a smile and pressed his lips against hers before pulling her into his arms.
“Goodnight,” He replied with a stifled yawn that she could feel in the stretch of his chest. Soon Finn was dozing off, his even breaths lulling her to a similar state of drowsiness, but not before she had a moment to reflect and thrill to the thought that this could become a her life, her routine. Having someone to wish goodnight and good morning, friends to share meals with, and spending her days learning something old and powerful and precious. When she started to fall asleep she was sure there was still a smile alight on her face.
~~~
To Rey’s infinite delight that is exactly what happened. The First Order had backed into the shadows since the battle of the Starkiller Base, “Tail tucked firmly between the legs,” according to Poe, so the Resistance was taking time for recruitment and training. Over the course of the next few weeks she spent her days training with Luke in the forests outside of the base only stopping for rations between physical conditioning and meditation exercises. On the occasionally afternoon off, when Luke’s presence was required for a strategy meeting or a diplomatic matter, Rey would spend her time in the X-Wing hanger in intense discussions with the platoon of mechanics continuously performing checks on the fleet. On one such day, when the Intelligence team was out of commission due to a computer malfunction, Finn took her on a picnic by a nearby pond he had found when he had been under orders to take walks each day for his recuperation. In the evenings Luke would consult with his sister, Chewbacca, and other high ranking Resistance officers while Rey met with Finn, Poe, and BB-8 for their supper spent sharing the adventures from the day and making jokes. After, Rey and Finn would walk back to their room hand in hand, belonging only to each other for the rest of the night. It was the happiest that Rey had ever been and she polished every memory like a precious stone, always aware of what was lurking in the darkness of their near future, and knowing now what exactly she needed to fight to get back after the dust settled.
One morning, three weeks after arriving at the Resistance base, Luke placed a book beside where Rey sat crossed legged and focused on her breathing. She heard the thump of leather against the moss covered dirt and smelled the stale dustiness of the pages, but could also sense an energy around it. She opened her eyes one at a time and stared down at it with curiosity. “This book,” Luke began, “was recovered from the home of the Jedi Obi Won Kenobi.” He settled across from her, the book between them and flipped open the first page to a diagram of a light saber handle. Then he unfolded the page further to reveal blueprints. Rey couldn’t contain her excited gasp. “It seems like you know a thing or two about engineering. I think it’s time for you to create a light saber of your own.” He folded the page back in and shut the book, pushing it towards her. “Look carefully through this book and pay special attention to any design that you think calls out to you. Trust your feelings.”
“Yes, of course.” Rey said, taking the volume with great care, “Thank you so much.” Luke merely gave her a wane smile in response before settling into his preferred posture for meditation. Very gently she settled the book on the ground and hunched over it as she turned through page after page of varying light saber designs. Did any of them call to her? They were all fairly similar in basic design and function. Every so often she would unfold a page to reveal the more detailed blueprints which would occasionally have hand written notes in many different writing styles added to the instructions. Those were more fascinating than the slight modifications between models and she wondered about each Jedi that had added their input. As Rey was unfolding a page that pictured a design with a pointed little star beside it, a piece of paper fell from the folds. It was yellowed with age, but not as much as the rest of the pages, and contained an intricate drawing of a... What was it? Rey wondered, squinting at the lines drawn so close they almost bled together. No, she thought disbelievingly, as her mind quickly flicked back to her old quarterstaff from Jakku that was nestled safely back on her bunk in the Millennium Falcon. She flipped the page to the side and then back again. These were blueprints for a dual-ended light saber. Was that even possible? Her eyes started to scan the notes that were scribbled onto the margins of the page, sharp little lines, but still legible. Many instructions were crossed out and it never indicated that it was successfully built, but the longer Rey studied the blueprints, both the handle in the book and the handmade ones, the more and idea started to solidify in her mind. This Jedi, an A.S. she noted the initial on the bottom right corner of the page, just tried to solve their problems by adding more complexity to the design. She saw it all the time. But this? She could definitely make this work.
“Luke,” She called, too excited to wait for him to complete his meditation, “I can pick any design in the book right?”
“Well, yes.” He gave her an unsure look, focusing on the paper in her hand, before rising and taking it gently from her. He stared at it for a long time and Rey wondered if she had done something disrespectful by picking a doodle for the plans of her sacred weapon, but he simple sighed and smiled sadly at her. “Of course. We’ll need to go on a journey though. I only have one set of focusing crystals to spare.”
~~~
“It will probably be a few days before we leave though.” Rey said to Poe and Finn that night, buzzing with excitement and a sense of purpose. She was going to build herself a light saber! “The First Order reinstated the Empire’s ban on the trade of focusing crystals so Luke is going to ask the General for whatever knowledge she has about Dantooine and if we’d be able to access the Crystal Cave. It’s like an actual Jedi mission.” Poe slapped a hand on the table as he laughed at her excitement and called for a toast. When she turned to beam at Finn he responded with a tight-lipped smile, but the expression didn’t quite reach his eyes. Her own excitement wavered for a moment before Poe was clinking his cup with hers and congratulating her on finally getting to go off world.
“It’s been too long. I hate staying grounded like this.” He said with a huff.
Later, as they walked back to their room, Rey could sense a shift in Finn’s normally unflappable good mood. The silence between them, for the first time, was heavy and tense instead of it’s usual peaceful ease. As the door to their quarters slid shut behind her Rey took a deep breath and steeled her resolve as she turned on him, “Are you mad at me?”
“What?” Finn sputtered, looking to either side of him as though there was someone else in the room she could’ve been addressing, “No, never. I would never be mad at you for Jedi-ing!”
“Well, okay.” Rey responded tersely, relieved but still a little on edge, “Then what’s the matter with you?”
“I’m just... sad, I guess? I knew you and Skywalker would start heading out on missions. I just didn’t think it would be this soon.” He rubbed the back of his neck nervously and Rey felt herself soften.
“Finn...” She stepped into his personal space and threw her arms around him in a tight embrace.
“I’ll just miss you.” Finn murmured into her hair, the vibrations in his chest echoing against her ear. He pulled away just enough to cup her chin and pull her face towards his for an achingly sweet kiss. They stood like that for a long time, embracing in the middle of their room, exchanging tender kisses that made Rey’s heart feel almost painfully full. Finn was seeking comfort and she was desperate to give him whatever he needed.
“I love you, you know.” She whispered to him between the soft pressing of their lips. Finn pulled his head away from her, his face as shocked and happy as the night she had shown up at his door after her several month absence.
“I really, really didn’t.” He responded before ducking down once more to kiss her with more force than she had expected. Eagerly she attempted to match his movements, push everything she felt about him into the breath that they were sharing. “I love you too. Obviously.” He added when they both broke off to gasp for air. She couldn’t help but laugh at the sublimely happy expression on his face, delighted that his moping was over, delighted that she had been the one to put it there. Rey pushed herself up on her toes to plant a kiss on him with enough force that he had to take a step back to balance with the weight of her. That was... good. That was actually definitely the direction she wanted them to go, if she paused long enough to think about it. So she kept pushing Finn back, arms wrapped around his neck, kissing him hungrily the entire time until his calves hit the edge of their bed. Finn, wonderfully clever Finn, seemed to pick up on her intention as he sat himself on the edge of the bed and helped her arrange herself with her knees planted on either side of his legs. Rey let her hands wander up and down his back, always careful of where the skin was still sensitive from his injury while Finn gripped her shoulders and pulled her as close into him as possible. Rey couldn’t help the deep moan that escaped her lips as something she had never experienced before rolled through her body. She broke off their kiss and rested her forehead against his shoulder, panting for air, still trying to move herself as close as she could to him while planted on his lap. “Are you okay?” He asked in that ceaselessly caring way he had, though she could tell by his voice that he was just as affected as she was.
“I’m amazing.” She repeated, as she remembered the first night she kissed him.
“I’ve never-” He started but paused, looking down at her uncertainly, “I mean, we can stop if you want. I wouldn’t presume anything.”
“I know.” Rey smiled at him before pulling back from him just enough to be able to move her arms between them. Even the slightest movement caused him to close his eyes and take a deep steadying breath. Rey felt exactly the same way as she wiggled maybe a tad more than necessary while unwrapping the ties on her tunic. By the time Finn reopened his eyes she was pulling her undershirt over her head and his mouth fell open into a perfect, round ‘O’.
“Wow. I mean- no, just wow.” Rey willed herself not to blush, knowing too well that it would start exactly at the crest of her breasts and work it’s way up. She moved her hands back around Finn’s back and toyed with the hem of his shirt.
“May I?” She asked, before she got too distracted by the way Finn’s fingers were tracing upwards over her bare side. He looked up from the path of goosebumps he was creating on her skin and it looked like he was taking a moment to process her request before his eyes lit up.
“Yeah! Of course.” She gripped the fabric between her fingers and pulled the dark cloth clear over his head before tossing it carelessly behind her. Rey stared at the expanse of skin that she had just revealed and was momentarily terrified by the notion that she had absolutely no idea what to do past this point. Finn seemed to sense her hesitation because in the next breath she was pulled into him once again as he kissed herslowly, his hands roaming over the skin of her back, making her shiver uncontrollably in his arms. Rey licked into his mouth as her own arms wound around his back and she let her fingers explore the ways his muscles rolled and shifted beneath her hands. She paused once again as she encountered where his flesh changed texture below her hands, raised and rough, and Finn responded to her touch by sitting up straighter and pulling out of her grasp, just a bit.
“Does it hurt?” It wasn’t the first time she had asked him that, but this time it felt like a completely different question.
“No.” Finn shook his head, his hands continuing to caress her back lightly, distractingly. “I just... I haven’t really seen it myself. It might be kind of a mood killer.” Rey laughed and pulled back from him, his eyes almost immediately trailing from her face over her shoulders and down to her chest, but she wanted him to look lower and pointed to a jagged pink line that stretched across the entirety of her right hip.
“I slipped on some oil while ripping the guts out of an Imperial Cruiser’s engine and fell on a breach in the hull. Not nearly as cool as how you got yours.” Finn traced the scar with the pad of his thumb, sending a tremor of heat through her body. “And, um, this one...” She lifted her left arm to show off a faded silver patch of skin, her voice soft and airy as she tried to concentrate on anything other than the way Finn had both of his hands now running lightly along the hem of her waistband. “Is from before I was any good at scavenging. I nicked a pack of nutrients from a trader and he nicked me with his blaster.” His hands stopped moving and she exceedingly missed the sensation.
“How old were you?”
“Young. Ten, I think.” Rey lowered her arm and met his eye, horribly afraid of the pity she’d see looking back at her, but instead he was staring at her with wonder. Like she had somehow done something more impressive than pickpocket a drunk. Like he hadn’t undergone something just as horrible and still come out of it the best man she knew. Suddenly they were kissing again, just as frantic as before, Rey’s hands pulling Finn’s face and tilting it just so while his hands resumed their exploration of her, more forward than before, running up and down her sides and kneading at her breasts. She groaned into his mouth unable to stop herself from reacting to the sensations wracking her body and she suddenly felt herself being lifted and laid down on the bed. For all of his kindness and gentleness, Rey often forgot just how strong Finn was, his body trained to be a weapon despite his heart full of love. Staring into her eyes, he sat up and gripped the waistband of her pants and undergarments, waiting. Rey gulped down any stray nerves that she felt and nodded to him. Finn smiled a happy crooked grin, one that was completely contagious, and proceeded to remove the remainder of her clothes.
“You’re the best,” He said as his eyes roamed up and down her body, “Have I told you that you’re the best lately. Really just the greatest person I’ve ever met.” Rey laughed and covered her eyes with her arm as she felt him move over her body again.
“Wait,” She said, uncovering her eyes and sitting up on her elbows. Finn freezed immediately, looking uncertain. But Rey just smiled wide and gestured to his lower half. “You too!”
“Right.” Finn looked bashful, but he stood up and removed his clothes while Rey kept her gaze on his face, not entirely sure where she was supposed to be looking right now. And then he was covering her again, smiling and kissing her all over her face while keeping the majority of his weight resting on his forearms. “I love you.” He sighed happily before pecking her on the tip of her nose. Rey rolled her eyes and smiled up at him.
“I love you too.” And then she swerved her head just in time to avoid the undoubtedly sweet, playful peck she was just about to receive on her cheek and instead planted her lips on his for a real kiss. A real kiss that turned real heated, real quick. It was the lack of clothes, Rey thought to herself before her head became too dizzy with feelings and urges to form a complete sentence, feeling his skin against hers from head to toe made everything somehow more. Finn’s hands seemed to want to touch her everywhere and she definitely reciprocated that feeling. As she spread her legs so that his body could fit more neatly above her, his fingers were working their way down her neck, over her shoulder, between her breasts. They lingered there a moment as his lips started to trace the same path, making her gasp as he kissed down her neck, and stopping at her shoulder where he pressed a series of light kisses as his fingers travelled even lower down her body, over her stomach that was rising and falling in rapid succession along with her breath, and “Oh! Oh, oh, oh,” she found herself babbling as he dipped them even lower.
“Is this good?” Finn asked nervously, fingers still brushing over her slowly. Rey nodded, unable to find the right words to describe just how good it was. This was... unbelievable. This was nothing she’d ever felt before. When Finn pushed a finger into her it made her toes curl and she clenched her teeth to keep down a scream. “Wow...” Finn whispered into her neck with awe in his voice. Oh, she really hoped he was having as good of a time with this as she was. Her body began moving in tandem with the pace his hand was setting, her hips pushing up without any direct command from her brain.
“Finn...?” She whimpered. It felt like a question, but she didn’t know enough about this kind of thing to understand what she was asking for.
“How does it feel, Rey?” He asked, his eyes searching her face for any kind of feedback. And, oh, the way he said her name like that, breathless and desperate, made her cry out again.
“I can’t... I think....”
“Anything. I’ll do anything you want.”
“Can you... go faster? Or deeper? I just need... more.” She gasped out and Finn swore before planting a frantic kiss on her that just made everything seem so much more intense. And when Finn pressed in another finger she couldn’t contain her yelp.
“I think this is the best thing ever.” Finn said into her mouth between kisses that she was sure she wasn’t able to keep up with.
“You always say that.” She breathed before another toe-curling wave of pleasure overtook her.
“Umm, I’m positive that after this I’m never going to say it about anything else ever again.” Rey’s responding giggle formed into a gasp as Finn began, she wasn’t sure, curling his fingers maybe? And the rolling feeling through her thighs started increasing rapidly.
“We could always...” Rey trailed off, not wanting to use the crude innuendos she learned in her childhood. They didn’t have a place with what was happening between her and Finn right now. “Sex.”
At the same time Finn offered hopefully, “Make love?”
“Yes!” Whatever it was called, that was what they should be doing. Her back arched off the bed just from thinking about it at the same time that Finn was doing whatever it was that he was doing to her. “Right now.”
“Right. Yes.” Finn gulped as he withdrew his hand from her and Rey shuddered at the sensation. Now, less distracted, she raised an eyebrow at him.
“Make love?” She asked, rolling the phrase around her mouth, unsure of how it tasted.
“Umm, that’s what Poe called it.” Finn let out an embarrassed laugh as he reached down into the space between their bodies.
“I like it.” Rey decided.
“Yeah?” Finn asked, as her stared down at her fondly. “Me too. But, are you sure about this?”
“Completely. You?” Finn nodded and leaned down to kiss her tenderly as she felt him start to push himself inside of her. Rey broke off the kiss with a groan.
“Are you-” Finn began to ask, before Rey leaned up to silence him with another kiss. It was very sweet of him, she thought as she tilted her hips up to stretch more of her body around him, but now was so incredibly not the time. Once he was completely inside of her, Finn paused and stared down at her with a look of such absolute devotion that her heart fell full enough to burst. “Okay,” He whispered, “This is the best thing ever. Last time.” He winked and Rey felt herself burst out laughing, the vibrations of it creating interesting sensations in her lower body. Finn could apparently feel them too as he groaned, lowering his forehead to rest on hers, and began to roll his hips away from and then back into her. It was like what he had been doing with his fingers, but a thousand times better. Beyond just how much more she felt, she could watch the pleasure as it flickered over Finn’s expression, and, oh wow, she could sense it as well. Her own sensations along with the echo of the things he was experiencing were clashing within Rey, the waves of feeling were synchronizing and building along her abdomen and down to her thighs. Every exhale was accompanied by a cry and, when she was able to summon the presence of mind to open her eyes, the expression on Finn’s face brought out a new layer of emotion to the whole experience and she’d have to squeeze her eyes closed again just to get a hold of herself. “Rey...” Finn gasped out from above her. And, oh, there was that voice of his again, the one that sent flutters down into her belly when her said her name like that. Only now the flutters were like an earthquake and she felt something building inside of herself that had her rocking her hips desperately against Finn’s as her hands pulled on his shoulders.
“Finn, Finn, Finn...” She tried to reply before his name just became a chant in time with each thrust of their bodies. He kissed her again, completely lacking in finesse, just his mouth open against hers as they gasped each other’s name. The feelings she was having, the strange mixture of what she knew were her own and what she felt coming from him in burning waves started to overwhelm her. Her breathe made it out only in short, sharp gasps and she could feel wetness forming in the corners of her eyes because it was all so much. “Finn!” She shouted, more urgently this time, she could feel that something was about to happen. Something intense. Rey locked her legs around Finn’s hips as he thrusted steadily into her until whatever that had been pulling taunt down the muscles of her thighs snapped and she felt her whole body contract and release at once as she gasped against Finn’s mouth. Finn cursed again, his pace increasing and turning sporadic as each thrust sent a rolling shiver of pleasure through all of her limbs. Distantly, like an aftershock, she could sense the pleasure of his own peak as his body shuddered above her, his head buried in her shoulder while he whispered her name.
They stayed connected like that for a long few moments, catching their breath and exchanging short, sweet kisses. Rey revelled in the intimacy of their sweat slick skin and matching heartbeats. Finn, though, slowly rolled off of her and flopped to his side with his head propped up on his elbow as he stared at her with his wide smile. Rey pulled herself up to lean back on her elbows, wiggling her sore legs and testing the sharp ache that shot through her centre whenever she moved them. She turned to Finn, whose gaze was trailing down her body when his expression suddenly shifted to something... nervous. “I didn’t think of it, but... was there something we should’ve done?” Rey stared at him confused, “Um... about babies?”
“Oh no!” Rey’s hands flew to her forehead, how could she have been so stupid? They’d spent three weeks kissing each other late into the night, had she really not thought to ask anyone what to do for... that? She tried to recall every single thing the older women had ever said about their brief affairs because none of them had any children that she heard of. “No...” Rey turned back to him and shook her head, “I don’t think we have to worry. There’s a, um, shot, I think? It works before or after. I’ll go ask at medical facility about it in the morning.” Rey grimaced slightly at the thought.
“I’ll come too,” Finn said immediately. Rey laughed and shook her head.
“I don’t think it works like that.” Though honestly she wouldn’t know.
“No, I know.” Finn smiled and pressed a kiss to her forehead, “But I’ll come too.” Rey wrapped her arms around him and held herself tight against him while pressing small kisses into whatever skin she could reach on his chest. Finn, she knew, would follow her anywhere.
“And you’ll come to Dantooine, too?” Rey asked suddenly, sitting up and turning her whole body to face him.
“What?” He asked, eyes still shining.
“You should come to Dantooine!” Rey exclaimed, suddenly seeing the whole situation with perfect clarity, “There’s no way that General Organa will let the only Jedi and his apprentice fly off without an escort! You should come, too!” Finn laughed and shook his head and Rey suddenly felt self-conscious. Was it too much, too soon? She’d never felt like that was the case with Finn ever before. “I mean, if you want to.”
“Of course I want to!” He laughed while pulling her in for a hug. “I’ve been waiting for you to ask me about that for weeks!”
“I haven’t had a mission for weeks.”
“Like I said, I knew it was gonna happen sooner or later. Listen, I respect General Organa and what she and the Resistance are doing here. But I didn’t stay for that. I stayed for you. Jedi bodyguard is the only job I want that they can give me.”
“You could’ve said something instead of moping all night.”
“I wouldn’t want to assume anything. You’re a Jedi; you don’t need any extra muscle. I was just hoping you’d want some.” Rey laughed and planted a kiss on the side of his mouth.
“I do.
~~~
A week later the Millenium Falcon was loaded with fuel and provisions, and Rey was circling the exterior doing her final check before take-off as Finn and Poe hugged goodbye at the edge of the docking area.
“Take care of that jacket, man.” Poe said as he released Finn with a clap to the arm, “And take care of Finn, Rey! May the Force be with you both!” He called over. Rey rolled her eyes and waved him off. Finn gave BB-8 a last thumbs up that was returned by the droid flicking it’s torch and then they were grabbing the last of the bags and heading onboard. Rey took the pilots chair and Chewy came to sit at her right. Luke and Leia were exchanging farewells below, the General glancing at the Falcon with a mix of envy and sorrow that broke Rey’s heart. But then the siblings hugged and the General waved up to her with a laughing smile while she heard the stomp of Luke striding up the ramp.
“All ready?” Rey called back, her leg bouncing in anticipation.
“Proceed.” Luke replied from back in the common area.
“Good to go.” Said Finn, as he leaned against the doorway of the cockpit, right behind her as always. Chewbacca roared his own consent and Rey reached up to flip the three switches to engage launch.
“Here we go!”