Chapter Text
Jax laid on his bed, unmoving. The past three adventures had been particularly stressful, and he was just… exhausted. He didn’t know why– they didn’t even feel high stakes. There was no reason for him to feel like this.
His brain was foggy. He had grown used to this fogginess, but he hated it. It made him feel dumb and thoughtless, and made him want stupid things. Like the cat plush he was currently holding to his chest. He stole it from the last adventure, and using cartoon logic, was able to hide it in his pocket without it looking like he had anything in there. It was a stupid and impulsive decision. He didn’t know why he did it.
Speaking of, he lifted the cat above his head to look at it. It was a little grey kitten with white socks, and it vaguely resembled a beanie baby. Not the ones with the bright fur and the glittery eyes, but one of the older ones– maybe from the 90’s or something. He clutched it back to his chest, sighing. It was from the most exhausting adventure Caine had ever made– making them take care of a daycare full of NPCs until the day was over. And somehow, Caine was spot-on when making toddler NPCs. It was horrifying. Which is why he took the cat– he didn’t get paid or anything for having to do that bullshit, so he deserved to get something from that adventure.
“Jaaax? Jaxxx?”
Ragatha’s call was muffled by his door, and he rolled over with a huff, facing the wall. He didn’t know why he did that– his door was locked, and he could just ignore her. Instead, he whined and covered his head with his pillow. He then realized he was no longer holding the cat, which was distressing. So he grabbed the cat with one hand, and held the pillow over his head with the other, trying to block out the world. He then heard a knock at his door.
“Jax? Are you in there?” He heard Ragatha call out, her signature pacifying, meek voice barely audible over the wood of his door. He didn’t want to respond. “I don’t want to bother you– But Caine has another adventure for us,”
Jax stopped himself from groaning loudly, and he slammed his cat and pillow down on his bed. He felt bad for the cat, and gave it a quick hug for being so rough with it, but then he stormed over to the door and flung it open.
“Fine.”
He huffed curtly, his tone clipped. He avoided Ragatha’s gaze and followed her through the halls, not having any smartass comments to make. He felt too tired and fuzzy to do it right now. His brain fog was horrible, and it was getting really, really irritating.
“Hey… Jax? Are you… you good?”
Ragatha asked, and he resisted the urge to yell at her for being patronizing. Of course he was fine! Why wouldn’t he be? He didn’t say anything for a moment, as they finally got to the main area. He was messing with his gloves idly as he walked, still refusing to look at her.
“Yeah. Fine. ‘m just tired,”
He grumbled, and he felt Ragatha’s gaze on him for a while longer, but she didn’t push it more. He just kept fidgeting with his gloves, rolling the part around his wrists before unrolling it. He was just following Ragatha, albeit, keeping his distance. However, he didn’t watch where he was going at all… and he collided facefirst with one of the blocks, falling unceremoniously on his ass.
“Jax! Are you okay?”
Ragatha rushed to his side, offering him a hand to help him up. He remained sitting on the floor for a second, rubbing his head.
It was one of the reasons he hated this fogginess– the fact that he was way more emotional and sensitive than he should be. It pissed him off, and he stared down at the floor for a second until he was able to will away the tears that tried to form. It was such a miniscule thing, he didn’t need to be a baby about it. He ignored Ragatha’s hand out of spite, standing up on his own and still rubbing his head. It was humiliating.
“...’m okay. Jus… Just… Uh. Tired,”
He murmured, still avoiding eye contact. He walked off before Ragatha could ask anything again, because this time, she probably would. She picked up the hint and caught up to him– which wasn’t hard because he was walking slowly. He was usually the king of speedwalking when he needed to, but he also just… couldn’t right now. He didn’t know why. He didn’t have the energy.
Ragatha tried to keep his pace, but she always walked fast. It was like a need for her to not inconvenience anyone and to be as quick as possible, which… she did. She was ahead of him once more, but he didn’t mind. He went back to fidgeting with his glove, but he was more careful this time. They eventually met up with the rest of the group, who were all waiting.
“Well, there’s the last two mischievous pillowcases! Let's get this show on the road, shall we?”
The portal opened, and Jax had no clue where they were going, and it made him a bit anxious. But he hid it well. At least, he thought he did. He just stood behind Ragatha, looking down at his gloves and messing with them. He was bored, tired, and he did feel a bit grumpy. He’d go on the dumb adventure, but he wasn’t going to feel happy about it.
“Wait,”
Zooble interjected, and Caine sighed, looking at them with masked annoyance.
“Yes?”
“Jax–” They directed their attention towards him, crossing their arms across their chest like a disappointed parent. It made him feel uneasy. “Are you okay? You’re… a bit off,”
He resisted the urge to stamp his foot at that, and simply glared up at them, a brief bit of clarity washing over him in his anger.
“Yes. I’m fine. Now are we going to stand here and play twenty questions all day, or are we going to get on with it?”
He huffed, fighting against it. The foggy feeling. It was partially working, but it kept on wanting to come back, which was not good in the slightest. He walked through the portal first, and he waited for his eyes to adjust to the bright, faux sunlight. He heard the others walk through with him, and as soon as he was able to see…
“You have got to be kidding me,”
Caine appeared next to him, gesturing out to the rolling fields of green and yellow, with a red barn perched nicely upon a hill.
“Not kidding at all, friendo. For this adventure, you’ll be living and working on a farm, until the end of the day! I got this idea from Ragatha and her countryside story, actually,”
He assessed with a nod, seeming quite pleased with this adventure. Jax turned to look at Ragatha, to chew her out, but she seemed equally as displeased by this as he was. Jax didn’t think she’d be very fond of her farm days, so he kept his mouth shut for now, although he was violently bubbling underneath the surface.
“Good luck!”
And with that, Caine was gone. Pomni uncertainly started walking to the barn, with Zooble and Gangle following her. Ragatha cast an apologetic glance over at Jax, but didn’t say anything as she followed them as well. Jax reluctantly trailed behind, although he was less than pleased about having to do this at all.
Upon reaching the barn, Pomni pulled off a sheet of paper that was pinned to the wall. She glanced over it, before looking up at them with a bit of a nervous smile.
“Okay, well, this seems to be the task list for the day. Uhhh… someone needs to muck out the horse's stables, someone needs to feed the horses, the cattle need to be fed, aaand…”
She went silent, before sighing deeply and continuing.
“What I assume the main objective of this adventure is– to find the mushroom-sniffing that is lost in the forest,”
“I can muck out the horses stables… since I apparently got you all into this mess,”
Ragatha murmured, rubbing the nape of her neck as she peered inside of the barn. She didn’t waste a second, sighing deeply as she picked up one of the manure rakes and walked inside. Gangle cheered up immediately, following Ragatha and grabbing the other rake. She seemed very interested at the prospect of Horses, even if they were just NPCs.
“I’ll help Ragatha, and I’ll feed the horses!”
She called out, and her good mood could be attributed to her comedy mask still being intact, but she also just seemed genuinely excited to be around animals. Zooble nodded, starting towards the barn.
“Well. I’ll feed the cows then. That’s fine, I like cows,” They murmured, grabbing the paper from Pomni before nodding to the both of them.
“You guys can go search for the dog, if you want. That way this adventure is over with quicker,”
With that, Pomni and Jax were left standing alone outside of the barn. Jax didn’t have a clue where the damn dog was, and knowing Caine, it would take them a bit of searching. So he shoved his hands into his pockets with a huff, storming off towards the ominous looking woods. It was a stark contrast from the upbeat appearance of the barn and the fields around them, so he had a feeling there would be some sort of objective lying in the gloomy trees.
Pomni walked silently alongside him, glancing around at the cornfields. Speaking of, those things were already making Jax nervous. He couldn’t see the corn, but even just knowing it was there was setting him off. Instead of focusing on the creepy crops, he started to idly kick a pebble along their path, lagging behind Pomni a bit. It didn’t work as well as it did with Ragatha, as Ragatha was quicker. Pomni was better about falling in line with him, and matching his pace– although it did seem to be a subconscious behavior.
He felt the foggy feeling wash over again, and he tried to fight it, but given that they were just walking in silence, he allowed it to exist. He still didn’t let it take hold, but he didn’t put as much effort into fighting it as he had previously.
They made it into the woods, and he could distantly make out Pomni calling out for the sheepdog, but he didn’t really pay much attention. He just wandered and kicked the pebble around more, going along the path idly. He shoved his hands in his pockets and ignored Pomni’s jabs and requests for him to “actually help”. He didn’t wanna.
He stopped kicking the pebble when he realized he was lost from Pomni. They must’ve gotten separated. And while he was fine with being alone usually, his panic spiked, which only allowed the foggy feeling to take hold faster. He felt it snare around him like a net, one that would be soft and comforting if he wasn’t actively fighting it. With no clue what to do, he just started running, trying to find Pomni despite his panic. It wasn’t working, and he tripped over something squishy… just to land in a pile of equally squishy things. They felt like rubber fidget toys, and Jax whipped around to see what he landed in.
Distantly, he was able to recognize that Caine had no clue how actual mushrooms and mushroom sniffing dogs worked. However, at the front of his mind was the fact that he fell into a pile of morel mushrooms. They were worse than corn and pomegranates combined– with their wrinkly, porous surface and all of the little holes and crevices…
Jax quickly jumped up and away, tripping over his own feet again. He landed on something soft, and if he was in a better headspace, he could confidently say he found the dog. But right now, his skin was crawling, he felt nauseous from the pure sight of those things, and he was spiraling into a sort of panic. The foggy feeling was overwhelming right now, and so he curled up into a ball. He felt the puppy nuzzle him, before ultimately flopping by his side. Jax wanted to reach out and pet him, but he still felt so gross because he touched those disgusting mushrooms.
Lots of time had passed. He didn’t know how much, but he knew it wasn’t long enough for his panic to subside, but just long enough for him to completely slip to the fogginess. He didn’t register the damp feeling on his face, or the fact that the dog was desperately trying to cheer him up. Instead, he just felt small and helpless and horrible.
“Jax? Oh, Jax, there you are! You found… the dog,”
He distantly heard Pomni’s footsteps approaching him, slowing as they reached his side. For once, she bent down to get more on his level, and he felt a hand on his shoulder. He didn’t lean into it out of stubbornness, but he kind of wanted to right now.
“Jax? What happened? Are you okay?”
He didn’t respond, instead huffing out a petulant “Nuh-uh!”, muffled due to the fact that he was hiding his face. Pomni went silent, which made him nervous.
“You wanna… you wanna go meet back up with the others?”
“No!”
He felt Pomni’s hand fall off of his shoulder for a moment, and he felt an overwhelming surge of shame. He was bad, he shouldn’t yell, he was being mean and rude and–
“Oh, that's a shame. I was going to say you could make sure the dog doesn’t run off again when we walk back!”
Jax paused. On one hand, he was scared and he didn’t want to see the stupid mushrooms again. On the other hand, he did really like the puppy, and he’d be sad if it ran away again. He looked up at Pomni, who was now standing. She smiled down at Jax, although she definitely seemed nervous and unsure of herself. He sniffled grumpily before also standing up, crossing his arms across his chest and refusing to make eye contact with her. They walked back in relative silence again, Jax in charge of the dog. He was almost thrown into another fit whenever he saw a piece of corn that had fallen, half eaten by a caterpillar looking thing. It grossed him out, even more than usual, because now it wasn’t just the grossness of the corn, but it also had a nasty bug on it. But Pomni just encouraged him to keep walking, and he didn’t want to be a baby, so he tried his best to ignore it. He gave it a wide berth on the path, though, because it was still super gross.
Eventually, they reached the barn again. Zooble poked their head out to greet them, but Pomni ran up to them before they could get a word out. He heard her mutter something in a hushed whisper to Zooble, and for a moment, he got really scared. What if Pomni was making fun of him? He’d be super embarrassed and it would be very mean. But Zooble’s eyes softened as they walked over to Jax.
“Hey, bud,”
They murmured, and Jax refused to look at them. Zooble could be really mean sometimes and he didn’t really like them. He knew they were only mean because he was mean first, but it still made him upset. They clicked their tongue and looked at Pomni.
“Yep. I had a roommate who did the same thing. I think it’s subconscious, if I remember correctly?”
Zooble observed, and Jax didn’t know what Zooble’s roommate had to do with any of this. He just wanted to go home and be left alone, and for nobody to bother him. He wanted his kitty plush and a nap, but no. He had to be on the stupid farm and it made him angry.
“Well… what is it, exactly?”
“It’s called age regression. People go back to a younger state of mind, often unconsciously. I’m assuming… that's what this is,”
Jax was offended! He was big! He was an adult! He wasn’t little or younger, and he wanted to yell at Zooble for saying that. But he didn’t want to be mean again, so he kept his mouth shut and just glared at them. They either didn’t notice, or they didn’t care. So they continued on.
“Honestly? I’d just see if Caine will let you guys quit the adventure early, especially since you already found the dog. We can hold down the fort from here,”
“What? Me?? But I don’t– I don’t know the first thing about this. I don’t want to mess up,”
Pomni protested, and now he was confused. Did they finally get to go home? He wanted to go home, but it seemed like Pomni didn’t want them to. He huffed loudly to express his clear displeasure, and for some strange reason, Zooble laughed at him! He glared at them harder, because that wasn’t nice at all.
“You’ll get the hang of it. Besides, I think he’s already spoken, alright? I’m not sure if he wants me to be there. Maybe Ragatha, but you know how those two are. Kinger… would be fine if he had a few more marbles. And I don’t think Gangle would want to. So if you’re fine with it, I think you’re the best option,”
Pomni tried protesting for a few more moments, before eventually relenting. Jax felt her nervous, sheepish glance, and he wasn’t sure why she was looking at him like that. Was something wrong?
“CAINE!”
Zooble shouted into the void, and after there was no response for a solid minute or so, they called out again. Caine appeared a minute after the second call.
“Why hello there, my impish ice cubes! What can I do for you?”
“I think Jax is feeling sick. Him and Pomni have already finished their part, can they go back?”
Zooble asked, and Caine considered it for a moment, drumming his fingers on his arm.
“Well, I’d say that's not really in the spirit of teamwork. But if Jax is actually sick, and the two of them have participated in this adventure… I suppose I can allow it,”
He opened a portal, and Jax was not sick. He felt fine. But any opportunity to go back was a good one, so he just absentmindedly walked through the colorful swirl. He heard Pomni follow him, but not before she muttered a soft “thanks, Caine” to him.
As soon as they got back, Jax stumbled to his room, as fast as he possibly could. He was still feeling fuzzy, but he knew he wanted to be alone. This wasn’t good. He wasn’t good.
“What– Jax, wait!”
He heard Pomni follow quickly after him, and she was much faster than he gave her credit for, even with her shorter legs. It didn’t help he was stumbling, and so he eventually slowed down, but only because his vision was getting blurry. Today had been so stressful, and he’d been fighting it for so long, he just wanted his kitty and he just wanted to go to his room. He heard Pomni catch up to him as he just stood there and cried, ashamed and embarrassed and pathetic.
“Hey… Jax, let's get to your room, okay?”
Naturally, jax wanted to be oppositional, but he followed Pomni as he finally reached his room. He didn’t like how pink it was, but it was more comfortable than the hallway. Pomni opened the door and followed him in, and he didn’t know what to do, now that she was with him. He felt like he should do something, but he didn’t know what. And then he noticed that Pomni saw his kitty, which was still sitting on the bed right where he left it. He quickly felt embarrassed, but Pomni simply walked over to the bed and picked up the grey kitten. She still seemed very awkward, but she offered it out to Jax. He hesitated for a moment– because only babies had stuffies– but he eventually gave in and took it from her wordlessly. She sat on the edge of the bed, and Jax followed suit, because he felt like that was what he should do. He clutched the plush tightly, not saying anything.
“Thats… a nice cat you have there, Jax. It’s very cute. Have you given it a name?”
He looked down at his Kitty, and solemnly shook his head. He was trying to fight against it again, the foggy feeling, because he knew, distantly, he shouldn’t be acting this way. His behavior was shameful. But he couldn’t fight against it. So instead he looked down at his kitten and hummed for a moment
“No… she doesn’t have any name,”
Jax murmured, suddenly feeling really bad for the grey plushie in his hands. He was supposed to be big and tough and strong, but realizing that he had been mean to his kitty and forgot to give her a name made him sad. He felt tears bubbling to the surface again and he glared away from Pomni, not wanting her to see him being such a crybaby.
“Hey, hey, don’t worry about it, Jax. We can… we can think of a name for her together, alright?”
He just nodded stupidly, but he rubbed at his eyes with the back of his hand, trying to be big and strong like he was supposed to be. He wasn’t very good at it. But Pomni reluctantly brought a hand to his back, and just rubbed in small circles. It made him want to cry harder, which made him angry. He didn’t want to be a baby, and he didn’t want the desire to be comforted and handled so carefully. He didn’t know how to deal with it, so he slammed one of his hands down on the bed, the one holding the kitten still closest to Pomni.
“Jax!”
Pomni shouted, which made him flinch. She quickly realized, and it seemed she was much more startled than upset, but Jax didn’t realize that. Thinking he was in trouble, he turned away from Pomni and curled into a ball again. She froze, contemplating what to even do in this situation.
“Hey, buddy… I’m sorry, you just— you just startled me. I’m not exactly the best at this… in fact, I’m not really sure why they chose me of all people to do this,”
She murmured, before reaching out and resting a hand on Jax’s shoulder again. He refused to come out of hiding, and something about it made a soft, endeared smile paint over her face. She had no clue how age regression worked, but Jax was still the same, if not a bit more whiny and pouty. But she’d take it over him pushing everyone away. For now, she just had to figure out a way to fix it. She had no clue how, she was new to this, but she’d find a way.
She didn’t exactly like touch, but Jax hadn’t shoved her off the past few times she’d rested a hand on his shoulder or his back. So she drew her hand away and steeled her nerves. She wouldn’t fuck this up. She wouldn’t!
“Hey, bud? You want a hug?”
Jax didn’t respond for a long moment, still remaining in his little cocoon of anger and sulking. But after a moment he lifted his head to look back at her.
“But… ‘m bad. I’m in trouble,”
He protested weakly, before glaring away, as if he hated that he even had to say that. Pomni shook her head firmly, tapping his shoulder so he’d look at her again
“You’re not in trouble, Jax. And you’re not bad, okay? You just startled me, is all. You can have a hug if you want one, okay?”
He seemed to ponder that for a moment, clutching the grey kitten tighter, thinking hard about it. Did he want a hug? He always did, but he was also supposed to be big. But also, he didn’t really want to be big right now.
“…promise? It’s okay?”
She simply nodded in response to him, and so he reluctantly leaned over and into her arms. Granted, it wasn’t much of a hug, per se. Given their differing statures and the way they sat on the bed, it was more Jax curling into Pomni’s side, as Pomni slung an arm around him. But they worked with what they had.
Jax still felt a bit silly about it. But he didn’t fight it, and just held his little grey kitten.
“I think I wanna name her…”
He looked around the room. He didn’t know what to name her. His gaze landed on a photo on his wall. He vaguely recognized the people in the picture, and it made him sad and happy at the same time. He looked down at the kitten and hummed for a moment.
“…Frog,”
Pomni didn’t laugh, her gaze landing on the photo as well. But she didn’t say anything about it, instead just nodding in approval.
“Frog? That’s a bit silly,” she murmured, reaching out and petting the top of the stuffed cat’s head, “But I think it fits,”