Ias
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Summary
“Did you do this? Put that shit in my dreams?”
What possible reason would I have to do that?
It’s not technically a denial.
“To fuck with me,” Daniel decides. “It’s kind of your MO.”
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“That was quite an original flavor of martyrdom.”
Ted lifts his head to peer over the two impressive bags of frozen peas slapped over both sides of his chest to see Trent lounging in the doorway to his living room, a plastic Tesco bag dangling from his fingers. Ted hadn’t even heard him come in. Possibly he’s been in some kind of pain-induced coma.
“Call me Saint Lasso,” Ted sighs, letting his head fall back down again. “They can make a little statue of me holding a pot of wax and a bale of my own chest hair.”
Ted loses a bet, gets his chest waxed, and enjoys some unexpected perks.
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When a player calls in sick to the photoshoot for Richmond's tastefully suggestive charity calendar, Ted gamely fills in.
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It’s not a particularly nice card. Cheap cardstock, lightly embossed, with shoddily printed flowers bordering the font in the center. Roses are red, Violets are blue… As far as Valentines’ day cards go, it appears to be standard fare.
Then Trent opens it, and splutters coffee all down his t-shirt.
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It’s a mediocre second date, even before Trent spots Ted Lasso across the bar.
Recent series
Recent bookmarks
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The Mortifying Ordeal of Being Known by SerotoninShift
Fandoms: Project Hail Mary (2026), Project Hail Mary - Andy Weir
19 Jun 2026
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After the Taumoeba leak, after I decided to die after all and turned my ship around to save Rocky, after Rocky's frantic calculations about food supplies, Taumoeba multiplication rates, and human caloric intake needs, after we realized that with some rationing and luck I would make it, but that we were headed toward the unknown territory of trying to rapid-prototype me a life support system and synthetic food supply on an inhospitable planet: after all of that, after everything, I shouldn't have been surprised that it only took a few months on board the Hail Mary for things to get weird.
~~~
Edit: I made some minor continuity and grammar edits on 6/20, this is the final version!
- Language:
- English
- Words:
- 31,917
- Chapters:
- 10/10
- Comments:
- 679
- Kudos:
- 1,378
- Bookmarks:
- 328
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- 13,756
Bookmarked by Ias
22 Jun 2026
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This signal will repeat until there are none left to send it by Moonshine_Dan, Synthyk (Moonshine_Dan)
Fandoms: Project Hail Mary - Andy Weir, Project Hail Mary (2026), Andy Weir's Project Hail Mary - All Media Types
21 Apr 2026
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The elevator's receiver array picks up a garbage signal beamed in from deep space. No matter their attempts, Eridian scientists cannot make top or bottom of it. A misfire, or an echo of that long lost crew's final transmission, most likely. It is recorded, but never publicized.
And then it happens again.
Bookmarked by Ias
12 Jun 2026
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Pines! Pines! Pines! - A Gravity Falls Fan Comic Collection by hellmandraws
Fandoms: Gravity Falls
19 Nov 2024
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A collection of my various Gravity Falls fan comics, previously posted on Tumblr. The main focus tends to be on the Stan twins.
Please do NOT repost my art! Please do NOT pin it to Pinterest!
- Language:
- English
- Words:
- 0
- Chapters:
- 34/?
- Comments:
- 1,446
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- 6,219
- Bookmarks:
- 1,198
- Hits:
- 75,862
Bookmarked by Ias
18 Nov 2024
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In which Ford's attempt to survive entirely on caffeine and paranoia suffers some pitfalls, and things happen differently in 1982.
- Language:
- English
- Words:
- 70,144
- Chapters:
- 10/10
- Collections:
- 2
- Comments:
- 980
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- 7,350
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- 2,202
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- 140,103
Bookmarked by Ias
13 Nov 2024
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In which Mabel and Ford are both aromantic, and neither of them has the vocabulary to express it.
A sequel to “Well, You Did Ask.”
Series
- Part 2 of I Hold Ford Pines at Gunpoint and Force Him to Talk About His Feelings
- Part 2 of The Queer Cinematic Universe
Bookmarked by Ias
01 Nov 2024