ditheringmind
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“Hey,” the message says. Just that nothing more. Easily ignored. If it were important, there would be more detail or Derek’s phone would ring. He shoves the anxiety-inducing technology back under his belly. He is exhausted once again, just the possibility of being needed to have to pull himself together, to appear normal. It makes his bones ache
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“Oh, god! Um yeah, clearly you are male I just um, how does this work? Like the baby thing then if you're, ya know a dude?”
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But…But then he looks at Derek and gets hot all over, and his already overactive imagination goes into overdrive. Images of a long neck tilted to the side, fluttering eyelashes against golden skin, and full lips parted over a breathy moan.
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Derek has a crick in his neck, a sore spot right at the back where that long tendon meets shoulder. It’s been hurting for days now, and Derek thinks it’s going to become a permanent condition. But the thing is, he knows exactly why he has the crick in his neck. Stiles Stilinski. He is the reason for Derek’s suffering. He is literally a pain in Derek’s neck.
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Micheal doesn’t know why Alex is here, he isn’t in his uniform, so it can’t be anything official, and Micheal doesn’t think he can endure being accused of dealing drugs or cooking them, or whatever it is Alex believes he is doing. The first time was enough. It had left him feeling slimy and guilty even though he hadn’t done anything wrong, he had tossed it off like it meant nothing, but it did. It really fucking did.
Series
- Part 2 of Convulsions
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“So, what if he kisses me and I have bad breath! There’s no coming back from bad breath on a first date, Eddie!”
Eddie rolls his eyes, clearly not grasping the gravity of the situation.
“Can you check?” Buck asks, a little desperately.
“Check… your breath?” Eddie sounds amused. He’s definitely not grasping the gravity of the situation.
Buck nods. Eddie rolls his eyes again but beckons Buck to lean in. Buck does, slowly, Eddie’s warm brown eyes on his as he does. At a respectable but effective distance, he pauses.
“Do your worst, dragon breath,” Eddie says softly.
or, buck asks eddie to check if he’s got bad breath before a date. eddie checks. thoroughly.
Bookmarked by ditheringmind
25 Jul 2026
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But he had to keep going, couldn’t just stop existing because he had a broken heart. Because the guy he was in love with ignored him like the plague. Gotta fake it til you make it, or something like that, no matter how miserable he is.
So he hid it, didn’t let anyone know how truely miserable he was. He handled his shit, because Buck was tough. He was always a tough kid, always pushing his sorrow and pain away, hid his hurt because he didn’t want to be a burden. Pushed it down and away until it was almost non existent. Because he thought he deserved it anyway.
He needed to pretend. So he smiled and worked and did what he could, and did it well, hit all his marks, grinning the whole time as if he was happy, as if he was winning, but it didn’t stop the gaping hollowness of nothing that appeared in his chest and swallowed him whole.
[part one of taylor swift songs series]
Series
- Part 1 of taylor swift is my muse
Bookmarked by ditheringmind
24 Jul 2026
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Whatever retort Eddie thought he was expecting, this was not it. Empty eyes and a mirthless laugh; a tight-lipped smile that might as well have been a grimace, a slow nod before Buck dragged his gaze back up to flit across the team’s faces and land, finally, on Eddie’s.
He almost missed it – a flash of something cold across dull blue eyes, there and gone in the same moment: resignation, or catharsis, or apathy – something cruelly familiar and dangerously absolute.
“I should have died under that truck. At least then, you would still have been my family.”
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Bookmarked by ditheringmind
23 Jul 2026
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I want to build a house with you, tell me it's a whole life too by Lacerta26
Fandoms: 9-1-1 (TV)
16 Jul 2026
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Buck didn't think he'd end up back at Eddie's after everything. All the things that drove him here haven't changed and neither have the things that made him leave again. Thirty four years old and able to drop everything in his life because he had no dependents, no responsibilities, no ties. Chris was gone and Eddie was following him and Buck was only at South Bedford because he was being left behind.
Buck has reckoned with his feelings by now, this past year after Bobby, after everything that went on in the desert, the lengths Eddie went to, bringing things into sharper focus. He's in love with Eddie, has been in love with Eddie for so long it just became part of the fabric of the universe, the baseline from which Buck operates. He's made his peace with it too, aware that Eddie doesn't feel the same.
He'd do anything for Eddie and Chris but he felt more like a guest than he ever had when they came back to LA, sleeping on their couch, waiting to be asked to leave. Better to go than be pushed, he figured, and yet the path always seems to lead back to here.
So, South Bedford it is, only there are four of them now, not three because Buck is responsible for more than himself these days.
Bookmarked by ditheringmind
21 Jul 2026
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“Aw,” Harry says, smiling. “That’s adorable. Is it like—is it a thing? Do all of you keep pictures in your helmets?”
A murmur of general consensus ripples through their group. Harry, apparently delighted by this new knowledge, demands to see everyone’s secret photos.
“They’re kind of private,” Eddie says, crouched down to unlace his boots. He has a smudge of soot over his left cheek, and his hair has come loose from the gel, a lock of it curling over his brow. Buck likes him like this, just a little dishevelled.
or, firefighters sometimes keep photographs of the people they love inside their helmets, to remember who they’re fighting to come home to. eddie’s isn’t what buck expects.
Bookmarked by ditheringmind
01 Jul 2026