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  1. Public Bookmark *

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    Summary

    Shane: You know, believe it or not, eating women out actually wasn't my favorite pastime
    Ilya: Sure.
    Shane: Ilya. I’m GAY
    Ilya: Not too gay to eat lots of pussy

    In which the women Shane has slept with share their experiences on social media, Shane and Ilya both react totally normally, and Hayden would like some clarity on his best friend's sex life

    A sequel to "ten out of ten"

    Series
    Language:
    English
    Words:
    12,353
    Chapters:
    1/1
    Comments:
    2,025
    Kudos:
    25,025
    Bookmarks:
    2,208
    Hits:
    189,485

    25 Apr 2026

  2. Public Bookmark *

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    Summary

    The problem is that Shane’s not just a sweet, occasionally funny, soon to be famous millionaire. He’s also fucking hot. He’s got these warm brown eyes, perfect skin, and abs. Actual, literal abs.

    But when Jessica licked them last week, he didn’t even get hard. He said he was too stressed about the scouts coming to his next game. Her entire Centaurs loving family would be disappointed in her, but she’s really starting to hate hockey.

    Or: 5 times someone wanted Shane (and later found out why they couldn't have him), +1 time Shane wanted someone back

    Language:
    English
    Words:
    7,205
    Chapters:
    1/1
    Comments:
    836
    Kudos:
    15,240
    Bookmarks:
    2,576
    Hits:
    89,724

    12 Apr 2026

  3. Public Bookmark *

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    Summary

    Cliff sighed. It was time to bite the bullet. “Man, y’know, I always wanted a little brother. And my dad, God bless him, he musta been shooting just X chromosome sperm. Love all three of my little sisters, but what the fuck? No brother? I was born to be a big brother. I think of you as the little brother I never got growing up. You’re my favorite person to hang out with, and I feel like I’m at least sort of mentoring you. My kids adore you and call you Uncle Ilya. You’re the little brother I never had, and I’m so lucky to have you in my life.”

    “Aww, Cliff, I like you too,” said Ilya jokingly.

    “Roz, what I’m saying is, it’s okay that your Montreal girl is Shane Hollander. Scott Hunter is an asshole for whatever he was doing.”

    Ilya was silent for a minute, “He was threatening to out us.”

    “I’ll break both his fucking legs,” Cliff promised. “No one is getting you fired.”

    “We’ve never thrown a game,” said Ilya, looking nervous, earnest.

    “Of course you haven’t: you’re too competitive and he’s too autistic.”

    “Artistic?” repeated Ilya. “I don’t think he can draw.”

    Here's a story of six times people clocked Ilya and Shane over the years.

    Series
    Language:
    English
    Words:
    6,812
    Chapters:
    1/1
    Comments:
    104
    Kudos:
    5,099
    Bookmarks:
    718
    Hits:
    68,481

    05 Apr 2026

  4. Public Bookmark *

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    Summary

    Want to win a date with an All Star?

    When the NHL hosts a charity gala during the 2016 All Stars weekend, both Shane and Ilya are put on auction as donors bid on a chance to go on a date with them in support of a good cause.

    Too bad they bet on each other.

    Language:
    English
    Words:
    24,623
    Chapters:
    6/?
    Comments:
    616
    Kudos:
    3,281
    Bookmarks:
    825
    Hits:
    58,992

    02 Apr 2026

  5. Public Bookmark *

    Tags
    Summary

    “So,” Cliff starts. “Ottawa.”

    “Ottawa,” Roz repeats, and the way he says it, half-amused, half-quizzical, gives Cliff nothing.

    “It’s not Montreal.”

    Roz looks offended. “Why would I go to fucking Montreal?”

    Cliff shrugs, going for casual. “Montreal Girl? I thought, you know, if you ever go to Canada…”

    Roz scoffs. “You and Montreal girl. You say I am obsessed with her, but is you who always talks about her.”

    “Yeah, because you’re always texting her!”

    “Well, I like to get laid.”

    And there’s Cliff’s opening.

    Or: Cliff has been suspecting that Roz moved to Ottawa for his Montreal girl for a while now. And tonight, they’re going to go out for drinks and he’s finally going to get some answers. Not even two overeager rookies are going to stop him. Except things don’t quite go as Cliff planned and Jane from Montreal is not what he expected.

    Series
    Language:
    English
    Words:
    6,737
    Chapters:
    1/1
    Comments:
    582
    Kudos:
    12,550
    Bookmarks:
    1,728
    Hits:
    71,474

    12 Mar 2026

  6. Public Bookmark *

    Tags
    Summary

    “I’m right here. And you are okay, and you are safe, and healthy, and you are at home, yes? It is quiet, and nobody is there, nobody is bothering you. And the world is full of stupid idiots, but you are not one of them. And I am here. When you need me, I am here.”

    ---------

    or: The whole world thinks Shane is gay because of some stupid internet rumors, and he doesn't even have to confirm it. He's losing control of his entire life and he needs somewhere to put what little he does have.

    Ilya has open hands.

    Language:
    English
    Words:
    37,065
    Chapters:
    1/1
    Comments:
    1,411
    Kudos:
    30,240
    Bookmarks:
    10,091
    Hits:
    431,344

    10 Mar 2026

  7. Public Bookmark *

    Tags
    Summary

    Hayden watches Shane, almost expecting him to go, "wow, I was hacked while we were at practice, look at these weird messages!". But no such luck. Shane smiles.

    A real smile, a big one, his text from Lily smile. God, Hayden was so sure they were sending each other endless strings of heart emojis and "I miss you more" "no, I miss you more"s, not…that. Never in a million years would he have guessed that.

    Or: 5 times someone's shocked to learn that Shane's a little freaky, +1 time someone isn't

    Language:
    English
    Words:
    5,913
    Chapters:
    1/1
    Comments:
    991
    Kudos:
    28,338
    Bookmarks:
    4,857
    Hits:
    181,049

    03 Mar 2026

  8. Public Bookmark *

    Tags
    Summary

    “Okay, no, you’re right. Fuck the Admirals. But fuck their stupid gay-kiss Stanley Cup win, too.”
    What?
    Another moment of quiet, then:
    “I never kissed my boyfriend on the ice, though,” Shane muttered resentfully. Hayden’s heart thudded at the bitterness in his tone. Shane didn’t talk like that.

    As Shane becomes more comfortable in his and Ilya’s relationship, he starts letting his guard down, bit by bit. Hayden is subject to some very confusing one-sided phone conversations.

    Language:
    English
    Words:
    16,547
    Chapters:
    6/6
    Comments:
    559
    Kudos:
    12,999
    Bookmarks:
    2,062
    Hits:
    122,358

    03 Mar 2026

  9. Public Bookmark *

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    Summary

    They’d considered it—Shane being gay. It’d been an option. But Ilya Rozanov and the way Shane looks at him like he’s the love of his life has blindsided them. Blindsided both of them, and there’s almost nothing Yuna likes less than being blindsided. 

    She’s not mad, David wants to say. We’re so proud of you. We’re so happy for you. We just didn’t know. 

    Somehow we missed it, you falling in love.

     

    or, what David Hollander and Ilya Rozanov talk about while Shane and Yuna are outside in episode six.

    Series
    Language:
    English
    Words:
    4,585
    Chapters:
    1/1
    Collections:
    1
    Comments:
    818
    Kudos:
    22,090
    Bookmarks:
    3,917
    Hits:
    158,212

    23 Feb 2026

  10. Public Bookmark *

    Tags
    Summary

    After a mix-up leaves Hayden with the wrong phone for three days, he ends up learning more about Ilya Rozanov and his secret girlfriend, Jane.

    Another Hayden-Finds-Out, because we can't have too many.

    *now with the extra continuing Hayden-Rozanov friendship text threads*

    Series
    Language:
    English
    Words:
    17,663
    Chapters:
    4/4
    Collections:
    19
    Comments:
    2,878
    Kudos:
    40,269
    Bookmarks:
    8,325
    Hits:
    454,575

    16 Feb 2026

  11. Public Bookmark *

    Tags
    Summary

    “Well, you are getting something from me. Two things actually: Life-changing sex skills and an opportunity to fuck me—”

    “—Oh, give me a break—”

    “—But,” Ilya says. “What am I getting out of this?”

    “The opportunity to f-fuck me,” Hollander snaps, and yeah, a pretty fair point.

    ilya is failing a class, shane is failing at exploring his sexuality. despite their seven-year-long animosity on the ice, they turn to each other for guidance. a deal is struck.

    Language:
    English
    Words:
    114,540
    Chapters:
    7/13
    Comments:
    1,611
    Kudos:
    9,208
    Bookmarks:
    4,148
    Hits:
    367,365

    14 Feb 2026

  12. Public Bookmark *

    Tags
    Summary

    Ilya doesn’t even realize when Arthur slips from his thoughts. There’s no sharp turn, no clear moment where the article stops being about a little boy who loves reptiles and starts being about the man lying beside him in bed. It just… happens. The way his mind always seems to find Shane eventually, like water finding its lowest point.

    a character study on shane’s undiagnosed autism

    Language:
    English
    Words:
    8,630
    Chapters:
    1/1
    Comments:
    999
    Kudos:
    27,989
    Bookmarks:
    6,549
    Hits:
    206,786

    09 Feb 2026

  13. Public Bookmark *

    Tags
    Summary

    Shane is silent for so long that Rozanov leans, slouching against the doorframe, and raises his eyebrows at him expectantly. “Yes? You are selling bibles?”
    “You fucked my girlfriend.” It tears out of him.
    “Ah,” Rozanov drawls, as if the thought is just now occurring to him, “yes. I did.”

     

    based on a tweet

    Language:
    English
    Words:
    11,710
    Chapters:
    1/1
    Comments:
    410
    Kudos:
    12,565
    Bookmarks:
    3,265
    Hits:
    151,747

    05 Feb 2026

  14. Public Bookmark *

    Tags
    Summary

    Barstool Sports Canada reports that Montreal Metros captain Shane Hollander has started learning Russian from new teammate and Russian rookie Sergei Dovonchezky.

    Ilya has some thoughts. None of them are particularly kind.

    Series
    Language:
    English
    Words:
    29,008
    Chapters:
    4/4
    Collections:
    1
    Comments:
    3,454
    Kudos:
    53,709
    Bookmarks:
    16,270
    Hits:
    871,686

    05 Feb 2026

  15. Public Bookmark *

    Tags
    Summary

    "God, you're such a fucking asshole," Shane said, but his breathing was beginning to even out. 

    "You love it." Rozanov's voice filtered through the phone. 

    A pause. 

    "You feel better now?"

    "Yeah... thanks,"

    "Good. Listen to me properly, Hollander. Scott Hunter doesn't know shit about us. And if he does, why has he noticed it, hmm? Think about that."

    Shane let out another laugh, almost hysterical sounding. "You can't seriously be suggesting that Scott Hunter is gay? You're fucking crazy, Roz."

    Oh my God. 

    The pieces clicked together. Shane and Rozanov?

    (shane calls ilya after he fights scott hunter. hayden & jj overhear)

    Series
    Language:
    English
    Words:
    3,240
    Chapters:
    1/1
    Collections:
    2
    Comments:
    460
    Kudos:
    20,818
    Bookmarks:
    1,831
    Hits:
    180,549

    05 Feb 2026

  16. Public Bookmark *

    Tags
    Summary

    "My point is that Rozanov, like, talks Shane down before he even realizes he’s panicking. He makes him snacks with fucking buckwheat in them and he even gets Shane to take a day off once in a blue moon. He’s an asshole,” Hayden says. “He’s obnoxious and rude and frankly, unpleasant. I’m not saying he’s a good guy. But he is a good husband.”

    Or: 5 times Hayden defends Ilya behind his back, +1 time he defends Ilya in front of him

    Language:
    English
    Words:
    4,315
    Chapters:
    1/1
    Comments:
    472
    Kudos:
    20,539
    Bookmarks:
    3,142
    Hits:
    97,417

    03 Feb 2026

  17. Public Bookmark *

    Tags
    Summary

    It’s not going viral because Jane’s true identity was exposed—or even because Ilya was blatantly sexting in public. That part’s as expected as Shane doing yoga or any human being on earth breathing.

    No, the texts are going viral because no one can believe how bad this “Jane” is at sexting.

    The women of the world are outraged. The men of the world are baffled. No one can understand why Ilya Rozanov, whose abs have their own fan club, is wasting his time on ‘a piece of cardboard that wished to be turned into a real girl’ (this particular joke has 300k likes and counting).

    Or: After a social media trend mocks Shane's sexting skills, he tries to improve them. It goes about as poorly as you'd expect.

    Now available in Russian

    Language:
    English
    Words:
    7,196
    Chapters:
    1/1
    Comments:
    1,594
    Kudos:
    52,513
    Bookmarks:
    10,787
    Hits:
    350,719

    03 Feb 2026

  18. Public Bookmark *

    Tags
    Summary

    Harris launches a new series for the Centaurs' social media: having the team answer his question of the day!

    This follows the season after The Long Game, when Shane joins the team on their road to the Stanley Cup, as they answer questions like who's the hottest/funniest/most perceptive Centaur, different preferences, rituals, and more.

    Language:
    English
    Words:
    50,205
    Chapters:
    45/45
    Comments:
    5,989
    Kudos:
    38,219
    Bookmarks:
    8,791
    Hits:
    731,354

    03 Feb 2026

  19. Public Bookmark *

    Tags
    Summary

    “Rozanov needs a place to stay. His visa won’t allow him to go home to Russia over the break, and we don’t have the cash to put him in a hotel.”

    Did the Harvard dorms completely shut down over the winter break? What about the dining hall? Shane supposed he didn’t really know. He’d never stuck around to find out, when he was younger. 

    “Okay?” 

    Coach raised his eyebrows. “So, he’s staying with you.” 

    Shane’s eyes went wide. 

    “What?” 

    “Come on, Captain,” Wiebe looked down his nose at Shane. “Try not to look too thrilled.”

     
    *

     
    or, Shane's a senior captain with an empty house over winter break. and Ilya's the freshman who will be crashing his Christmas. 

    Series
    Language:
    English
    Words:
    80,396
    Chapters:
    11/11
    Comments:
    3,701
    Kudos:
    16,001
    Bookmarks:
    5,517
    Hits:
    433,822

    28 Jan 2026

  20. Public Bookmark *

    Tags
    Summary

    All in all, it could have been worse.

    It’s not like you can measure the full length of Shane’s dick, or see the exact moment that Ilya swallows down the mess of spit and his own cum from Shane’s mouth after he sucked the life out of him.

    It’s just, well, everything else.

    Language:
    English
    Words:
    4,455
    Chapters:
    1/1
    Comments:
    131
    Kudos:
    6,386
    Bookmarks:
    1,043
    Hits:
    48,656

    25 Jan 2026

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